


A Thorn In My Heart (Levi x Reader)

by Aluesaeri



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anger, Angst, Eventual Fluff, F/M, Guilt, Slow Burn, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:14:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 54
Words: 63,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25274509
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aluesaeri/pseuds/Aluesaeri
Summary: You recently lost your entire squad including your brother Rhys in a mission where the Female Titan appeared. You're angry at your loss but even angrier at the fact that Captain Levi has interfered. As if things couldn't get any worse for you, being one of the few who encountered the Female Titan, you are assigned to Squad Levi and now have to deal with him more often than you would prefer. Will you survive this transition and your loss? And will you be able to deal with this infuriating man being your commanding officer?Completed: Main Story at Chapter 33Chapter 34 Onward are One-Shots for this particular fic <3
Relationships: Hints of Hange Zoe/Moblit Berner, Jean Kirstein/Reader (Unrequited), Levi & Reader, Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Reader, Sasha Blouse/Connie Springer
Comments: 199
Kudos: 223





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first Shingeki No Kyojin/Attack On Titan Fanfic. Let me know what you think in the comments and I hope you enjoy this as much as I did writing it :)

“No. No.” The words spill from your mouth as you try to convince your brain that your eyes must be lying to you. That the scene before you is false. That your world isn’t painted with blood and mangled comrades. You crash to your knees taking in your fallen squad, well what was left of them. Byron Cohen, your squad leader, a red-headed man, quick-tempered but also quick to laugh, is smeared against one of the giant trees. His lower half dangles from his 3-D Maneuver Gear. “No.” Anton Barlow, kind-hearted but one to drink away his sorrows. All that is left of him is a blood-stained boot. “No.” And lastly, your brother, Rhys. The gentlest man you had ever known. Your role model and the only family you had left after the breach of Wall Maria. His torso is twisted beyond recognition and what is left of his face is an expression of sheer terror. Tears flood down your cheeks as you scramble closer. “No! No!” The Female Titan had done this to him. She had turned him into a human windmill and murdered him. Him and the rest of your squad. You stroke Rhys’s cheek closing his horror-stricken eye which you knew would haunt you forever. “I’m so sorry, Rhys. I’m so sorry.” 

As you stare down at your brother’s mangled form, you can feel the vibrations. The tell-tale signs that a titan is approaching. Thump. Thump. It’s getting louder, yet you can’t tear your eyes away from his body. Can’t free yourself of his bloody image. Thump. It’s almost here. Thump. The trees shiver in front of you and you finally rip your gaze from Rhys. It’s a six-meter class titan: a gaping mouth of teeth and shaggy grey hair. You tremble as the titan snaps its head forward snatching Squad Leader Byron’s remains into its wide mouth. Blood trickles through its hellish teeth and the wires from his gear hang from the side of its maw. It pivots its head eyeballing you and Rhys. It takes a step towards you both. Its eyes are dark orbs in a fat disgusting head. Drool laced with blood drips from its mouth and you whimper involuntarily. It takes another step forward before squatting in front of you. Hot breath wraps around you as it grabs Rhys with a steady hand. It lifts him above its head jaws opened wide. Something breaks at the sight of Rhys’s limp form being lowered into the chasm of its disgusting mouth. 

“No!” You scream ripping your blades from your belt and sending the line from your gear hurtling into its shoulder. “You can’t have him!” Before you’re able to reach it. Before you can even sink your blades into its nape. Something heavy collides with your shoulder. Your sent hurtling sideways. You watch as Rhys’s body disappears into its jaws. “No!” You fight against the force that is depriving you of saving your brother. It’s only when you finally peel your eyes away from the titan that you notice it’s Captain Levi and that he’s carrying you away from your squad and from Rhys. Slate eyes meet yours and fury bubbles to the surface. “Let me go!” You struggle against his grip promptly kicking him in the shin. 

He grimaces before leveling you with a glare. “You little shit.” You’re getting farther away from the titan. Farther away from your squad. You punch him in the gut. “Fuck. I should have left your sorry ass.” But despite his words, his grip doesn’t loosen.

“Let me go! I have to save him.” You yell striking him again. The scenery slowly stills around you and you realize you’re perched in one of the trees. He’s out of breath and his expression is unreadable. He steals a glance back towards the titan as if contemplating something. You take this as your chance, pushing off from his chest and sending him flying back into the trunk of the tree. You take aim, targeting a branch behind him when something flat and cold connects with your head. 

“You brat.” He says. You only see the anger and exasperation in his narrowed eyes before black spots blossom across your vision. There’s a soft thud on the branch behind you and another voice.

“Yeager. Get her back to the rest of the Corps.” He says.

“Yes sir. But Captain won’t you be accompanying us?” The voice responds.

“Tch. Follow your orders, brat. Tell Erwin I’ll be there shortly.”

“Yes sir.”

Your world goes completely black.

************************************************************************************************************************  
It’s been four days since the mission beyond the walls. Four days since your squad and your brother were brutally murdered before your eyes. Four days of misery spent in and out of the infirmary and Commander Erwin Smith’s office. You’d barely slept and in all the chaos of being back behind the walls, your anger dug a well deep within the pit of your stomach. You snapped at anyone who gave you the chance. It was even so bad that you had yelled at a first-year recruit for even looking in your direction in the mess hall. Life was dull now. What little light you had had was gone. They were gone. Your only friends. You wouldn’t hear another crude joke pass Byron’s lips, or see the tips of Anton’s ears go red as he tried to persuade your squad leader that it was highly inappropriate to make suggestive comments about the women in the Corps. Worst of all, you would never see Rhys smile at you again shaking his head at their antics. 

You sigh deeply, rounding the corner on your way to your room. You almost make it to the door when a high-pitched voice yells your name. “Private l/n!” You turn to see Squad Leader Hange Zoe barreling in your direction. Her face is flushed and she huffs heavily as she finally reaches you. You put your fist to your heart in a half-hearted salute.

“Yes, Squad Leader Zoe?” You ask. Despite her seemingly genuine appearance, you’re a little nervous. You recall Squad Leader Byron mentioning her and her obsession with the titans. Let alone her weird experiments. 

She takes a deep breath before speaking. “I’d like to speak with you about the Female Titan and about your reassignment.” Her words sting. You were already being reassigned.

“With all due respect, I’ve already met with Commander Smith several times.” You say. She gives you a meek grin. 

“I know. I know you’ve been through the ringer these past few days but I need to tell you about the severity of it all.” She says readjusting her glasses. You bite your lip. What is she talking about? Was it not enough that you were being forced into another squad so soon? Not enough that you had been questioned day in-and-out for at least three days straight? You glare at her and she smiles, wrapping her arm around your shoulder. “We have a lot to discuss. Let’s go to my office.”

***************************************************************************************************************************  
“Wait what?” You ask. Squad Leader Hange Zoe sat behind her desk her hands tented in front of her. Her desk was a mess of paperwork and behind her a chalkboard was littered with chalk drawings of titans. Some were missing limbs. 

“Commander Erwin wants you reassigned to the Special Ops Squad. For Eren’s safety. You’re one of the only ones who knows about the female titan’s true form and how important Eren is to our cause.” 

“Commander Smith wants me on Squad Levi?! Is he insane?” You ask.

Hange laughs. “Sometimes I wonder the same thing. Though he hasn’t steered humanity wrong yet.”

“And why didn’t he tell me on the numerous occasions that I was in his office?” You ask.

She shrugs. “Not a clue. Why he does things the way he does is a mystery to all of us. But I do know that he wanted me to explain to you about the titan shifters so maybe it made the most sense to him?” She leans back in her chair crossing her arms behind her back. She smiles apologetically. 

“Great. Just great.” You mutter. You can picture Captain Levi from the day your squad was murdered and you clench your fists. “I have to take orders from that prick.” 

Hange snorts. “You may not want to call him that in person.” 

“Oh, trust me. I have worse words for that bastard when I see him.” You say.

She gives you a cross look but doesn’t address it any further. 

“When?” You ask hoping you have more time before you join your new squad. More time before you have to get back out there beyond the walls.

“In two days.” She says.

“Great.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think? Leave me a comment :)


	2. Chapter 2

Two days wasn’t nearly enough time. You’d woken up that morning puffy-eyed and lacking sleep as you’d been hit with a bout of nightmares that night. They’d been filled with titans and the dead and you wondered how many others suffered the same nightmares before putting on your uniform. 

Now, you stand outside the training grounds. Fist to your heart and surrounded by recruits far younger than you. Whereas you were twenty-five, your new squad members could be no older than nineteen and you wonder how the hell this bunch of kids managed to weasel their way into Levi’s squad. Eren Yeager stands to your right. His green eyes brim with determination and the rigid way he holds himself as he salutes tells you all you need to know. He’s eager and he’d seen too much for someone his age. Next to him was Mikasa Ackerman and even to you she’s a bit intimidating. Black hair and dark eyes that stare at nothing but Eren. She’s aloof and frankly her attitude reminds you a little bit of Captain Levi, the few times you had seen him before that day. Armin Arlert stands beside her. The boy looks far too innocent with his mop of blonde hair and quivering blue eyes.

“Private l/n, was it?” Jean Kirstein asks from your left. He’s a tall boy with lanky features and boy was he full of himself. He smiles coyly. “Sorry that you have to be put on a squad with this bunch of losers.” He says eyeing Eren. 

“Who are you calling a loser?” Connie Springer asks. His close-shaved head bobs beside Jean eyebrows furrowed. You snort at his outrage.

“Everyone here except myself and Private l/n, of course.” Jean says looking down at Connie with a smirk. 

“Hey! Sasha and I aren’t losers!” Connie spits back. He turns to Sasha who weirdly has a half of a baked potato in her mouth. Connie sighs. “Sasha! You’re supposed to have my back.” She doesn’t answer and by the blank stare she’s giving, you can only assume she’s spaced out.

“If you’re done being obnoxious. We have work to do.” Your eyes shot to the person speaking and find that Captain Levi has already arrived. His expression blank as he looks at each of his new squad members. Your body stiffens in his presence.

“Captain Levi, sir.” Eren says. “I apologize for their idiocy.” He makes a pointed look towards Jean.

Levi eyes you briefly before sighing and turning towards the arena. “We don’t have all day.”

It seems your first team-building exercise would be sparring. Everyone was paired off into twos and had to fight until the other was pinned or could no longer get up. Unfortunately for Jean, he’d been your first partner and had landed with his face in the dirt and your knee on his back in mere minutes after the bout had started. Captain Levi had stared blankly at the two of you and frankly it had infuriated you. 

Now Mikasa stands before you. Her fists held in front of her and her stance wide. You mimic the position readying yourself for what you know is going to be one hell of a fight. Mikasa strikes first kicking off from her stance and nearly kicking your legs out from under you. You dodge aiming a jab to her shoulder hoping to throw her off kilter. Your hand barely touches her as she slides past you kicking at your head from behind. You duck sending your elbow back into her stomach. You hear her gasp for air briefly before she retreats and punches you in the shoulder blade. You know the hit hurt you both. You wheel around aiming a punch to her face. You miss. 

“Hey, watch the faces ladies!” You hear Jean yell. 

Rolling your eyes, you circle the girl. There’s no doubt she’s good. But there is no way you are going to let her win. You have years on her. Years of titan killing and getting out of sticky situations. You smirk before running at her head on. Her dark eyes widen as she jumps to avoid your kick at her legs. You duck down low grabbing her calf in the crook of your elbow. You drive your momentum forward spinning and throwing her to the ground. A small yelp escapes her as she falls on her back. She’s quick though and you see her roll on her side. You see her grab a handful of sand and before she can throw it you pin her arm to the ground with your boot. She squirms and she does the unthinkable. She fucking bites your leg. 

“You bitch!” You yell both in anger and pain. Her dark eyes narrow and you bring your other leg back ready to kick the living shit out of her. You don’t get the chance. With a swift kick to your chest you're sent sprawling. Captain Levi stands in front of Mikasa his eyes shooting daggers at you.

“Oi. That’s enough.” He says. 

“The fuck?!” You yell. “I get bit and I’m the one you send flying?”

He raises an eyebrow at you. “Maybe you shouldn’t have underestimated her.” He says before turning to return to his previous spot under a nearby tree. You spot a rock next to you and you chuck it at him without remote hesitation. He dodges it easily, but as he turns and fixes you with a murderous glare you wonder if that had been a mistake.

“Private l/n. My office after dinner. Don’t be late or you’re off the squad.” He says. “You’re all dismissed for today.” 

Eren helps Mikasa to her feet and you glower at her. Damn her and her abilities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	3. Chapter 3

Dinner was tasteless. You’d been dished a bowl of vegetable soup and a small loaf of bread, yet you’d found you had little appetite. Your leg still hurt from your spar with Mikasa, but that didn’t hurt as much as your pride. Captain Levi had humiliated you in front of a bunch of kids. Let alone your new squad mates. You sigh shoveling a spoonful of the soup into your mouth. 

“Why all the dramatic sighing, beautiful?” Jean says taking a seat beside you. You pinch the bridge of your nose. You really don’t need this right now. 

“Hey! Leave her alone, Jean.” Eren says knocking him on the back of the head. 

“Hey asshole!” Jean barks about to get up and face him. “No one asked you.”

You grab the back of his collar forcing him back into his seat. There is no way these two are going to fight in your general vicinity and over you. His eyes widen and you give him a smile. “I’m fine. Thanks for your concern. Both of you.” You look to Eren who nods before taking a seat across from you. Mikasa glares at you but takes a seat next to him. Before you know it, all your squad are sitting with you. Sasha is shoveling food down her throat faster than should be humanly possible. 

“So, you worried about the Captain’s punishment?” Jean asks. You stare at him wondering if he truly is an idiot. 

Eren kicks him under the table. “Jean, shut your mouth. Y/n is probably already worried enough without you asking her.”

“Stop telling me what to do Yeager!” Jean yells.

“Do you two ever not bark at one another?” You ask. “I swear it’s like the two of you have some deep found respect for one another but won’t say it.” You say sarcastically. Both boys blush slightly before turning their attention to their food.

“As if.” Jean says tearing into his bread. 

You chuckle looking back at your own food. There’s no way you’re going to eat the rest of it. Your stomach is in knots. You rise from the table with your tray when Sasha fixes you with a creepy stare.  
“Are you going to finish that?” She asks and you swear you can see just a faint line of drool on her chin. 

“Uh no.” You say as she swipes the tray from your grasp. Connie scolds her as she downs your soup. “Um, okay. I’ll see you guys tomorrow. Time to go face Captain Prick.” It gets a few chuckles out of the group and they wave their goodbyes. 

****************************************************************************************

You find yourself outside the Captain’s office and yet your hand hovers just inches from the door. Why the hell is your heart hammering away inside your chest? He’s not that intimidating, you tell yourself. You take a deep breath and rap your knuckles against the door.

“Come in.” You hear from the other side. As you enter the room, you’re genuinely surprised by how tidy it is especially compared to Hange’s office. Papers lay in a neat stack on his desk, his Survey Corp jacket hangs over the back of his chair, and you swear the books on the bookshelf are alphabetized. Levi doesn’t look up from the report he’s reading. You stare at him waiting for him to at least acknowledge your presence. He doesn’t. You glare at him. His head rests on his fist as his eyes shift across the paper and you notice that this is the first time that you’ve seen him in any sort of casual wear. He’s in just a white button down and black pants. The first button undone and your eyes linger just a tad too long on the bare skin there. His black undercut hangs in his eyes and as you search his face for any indication that he might tell you why you’re here he speaks.

“Like what you see?” he asks not once looking up. You blush tightening your hands into fists.

“Fuck you.” You say and a hint of a smirk touches his lips. Finally, he tucks the report into his desk and looks up at you. “Why am I here?”

He stares blankly. “Is that really a question?” 

“Tell me why I’m here or I’m leaving. I don’t need anymore of your shit. Frankly, I’ve seen enough of you for a lifetime.” You say through gritted teeth.

“Clearly.” He says and you know your face is bright red now. You wheel towards the door and he sighs. “Private l/n take a seat. I’m not done with you yet.” You glower at the man before taking a seat across from him. His expression doesn’t change and you wish you could read him even a little bit. “You did well today.” He says and you’re genuinely shocked at the praise. “Though kicking your squad mate’s brains in might have been a bad idea.”

“Is that why you sent me sprawling on my ass?” You ask sarcastically.

“Yes.” He says. “That and you’re too cocky.” 

“Excuse me?” You ask incredulously.

“You underestimated Mikasa because you think you have more experience.” He says.

“I do.” You retort and he rolls his eyes.

“Shit ton that did for you out in the field.” He says. You wince. “Just because you have experience doesn’t mean you can’t learn anything new. You need to expect the unexpected. You didn’t and that’s why you got bit and why I stopped you from kicking the shit out of Ackerman.”

You bite your lip. “What the fuck do you know?” He raises an eyebrow but doesn’t respond. “I’m tired of your shit, Captain. Frankly, I didn’t ask for any of this. I didn’t ask to be on your squad. I didn’t ask to be put with a bunch of third-year recruits.”

“You’re right. You’d rather be dead in the belly of a titan with the rest of your squad.” He says his eyes narrowed.

“Fuck you!” You yell rising from your seat. “You don’t get to talk about them. You don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about.”

“Clearly. I suppose you were using your 3D gear to escape that titan then?” He asks his tone biting.

“I could have killed the bastard if you hadn’t interfered. I could have saved Rhys if you hadn’t stopped me!” You can feel the tears pricking at the corners of your eyes and you hate it. You hate him.

“You can’t save the dead, l/n.” He says, and his eyes don’t seem quite as hard.

“I’m leaving.” You growl. You can’t deal with anymore of this. You don’t know what he wanted but frankly you don’t care. You’ve had enough. You turn for the door.

“L/n. You have cleaning duties for a week. I expect to see you in my office after dinner tomorrow. Consider it your punishment for trying to kill me with a rock.” He says.

“I should have thrown it harder.” You say as you storm out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning your head is pounding as you make your way through breakfast and to the titan training course. Last night was a bit of a blur, you had made your way to the tavern after your argument with the Captain and frankly you didn’t really remember how many drinks you’d had. Luckily, Hange had been there and she had walked you home before you’d had the chance to fall asleep at the bar.

You rub your temples trying to make sense of what the Captain is asking of you all. “Private l/n, were you listening?” He asks.

“Yes sir.” You say hoping he believes you.

His eyes linger a moment on you before he continues speaking. “You’re running the course today and you’ll all be working against one another. One of you will run the course while the others try to stop you.”

“But sir, what’s the point of this exercise? We won’t have to deal with human interference when we take down titans in the field.” Armin says. His words make you twitch and you wonder if Captain Levi created this drill just to get under your skin.

“You never know what kind of dangers there are out there beyond the wall.” He says. “That’s enough talk.” 

You watch Eren run the course. He’s quick on his feet and he dodges Jean and Armin easily as they fly towards him with their 3D gear. He swoops below them slicing the nape free of one of the titans. His cut is too shallow.

“Damn it!” He curses from his position in a tree. You wonder if the Captain has noticed. Your eyes wander to him. His back is against a tree, his expression bored. He’s eyeing Eren’s handiwork. He’s noticed. His eyes shift to the tree next to Eren and you follow his gaze. Mikasa emerges from the brush shooting towards Eren with incredible speed. She kicks the poor boy in the jaw sending him reeling. He shoots off his gear at the last minute breaking his fall but unfortunately it leaves him dangling upside down by his leg as the wire twists around him.

Levi snorts as Mikasa and Connie try to untangle him. “You’re up l/n.” He says his dark eyes meeting yours and you sigh. Hopefully your stomach won’t swim quite as much when you run the course.  
You launch yourself from the ground, your h/c hair whipping around your face as you hop from tree branch to tree branch. 

Sasha emerges from a tree to your right yelling at the top of her lungs. You duck under her fist before kicking her feet out from under her. She loses her balance clutching the branch for dear life. “Hey, y/n that’s not fair.” She says her brown eyes furious. You shrug kicking off from the branch and homing in on the titan. Your blades cut through the nape like melted butter. It slips free hurtling toward the ground. You smile. Your eyes search the treetop for any movement and sure enough Mikasa is heading straight towards you. You can see the tread of her boot as she aims for your shoulder. You duck and she sails past you. You use the butt end of your blades nailing her between the shoulders. She tumbles to the ground her expression livid. You know the blow will bruise and you smirk. Serves her right for biting you. You drop lower targeting the next titan. Unfortunately, it seems it won’t be that easy. Captain Levi stands on top of the titan’s shoulder his blades at the ready. 

“Fuck.” You say under your breath. Of course, he wouldn’t let you run the course without getting involved. His dark eyes find you amongst the trees and he smirks. You stop moving and balance yourself on a branch trying to assess the situation and your best move forward. Any way you look at it, he has the advantage. You’ve seen him in action a few times beyond the wall and you know you can’t possibly beat him in close quarters. You bite your lip before launching off from your branch. You shoot past him and just barely catch the faintest look of surprise on his features. You go for the other remaining titan. Hoping that the Captain will leave you and your pounding head alone. Of course, he doesn’t. You can hear him behind you. His boots thud against the boughs as he gives chase. You drop lower among the trees. The titan is in your sight now. You launch towards it swinging your blade in a deadly arc. Your blade spins out of your hand and clanks noisily to the ground. Pain twinges your wrist where he struck you and Levi shoots towards you again. “Fuck.” He’s quick. You try to right yourself but he closes in. He swings his blades towards you and you just barely block with your remaining blade. The steel screeches as he kicks off from you and comes in for another blow. His blows are heavy for someone of his stature and you find yourself reeling as to what the hell you can do to get yourself out of this situation. You look up seeing a dead branch hanging just above you. You propel yourself towards it careful to land closer to the trunk. Levi follows putting his full weight on the branch as he charges you. You smile at his confused expression as it snaps. He falls not-so- gracefully and you take this as your chance to get away from him. 

You throw yourself at the titan gripping your blade with both hands as you target the nape. You rip through it once. Twice. It’s sloppy but the nape slides down to the ground with a satisfying thud. You take a deep breath trying to steady your ragged breathing. Sweat pools at your lower back and you hate the way your uniform is sticking to you. You take another breath preparing to go back for the other titan. Instead you feel a boot collide with your back and you’re sent plummeting to the ground. You spin hoping to right yourself with your gear. Instead your met with another kick to your stomach and Levi’s hard eyes. The ground knocks the air out of you and Levi’s knee rests on your abdomen. His blades hover over your throat as he breathes heavily. You notice a nick at his temple and a trickle of blood along his jaw. He doesn’t speak but his eyes search your face. You blush slightly at the awkward position you’re in. 

“Woohoo! Go y/n!” You hear Jean and Connie’s voices before you see them emerge from the woods. The others follow. They grin at you, but Eren’s expression turns to worry. 

“Uh, Captain. You can get off her now.” Eren says.

Levi digs the blades into the ground on either side of you using them to lift himself off you in one fluid movement. He grips the blades ripping them free and sheathing them as he walks away from you. You watch his retreating figure as Jean gives you his hand to help you back on your feet. 

“What the hell was that?” Jean says and you shrug as you dust yourself off. You can still see the Captain’s eyes as he pinned you down and you shiver. 

“Come on. Let’s grab dinner before it gets too late.” You say and Sasha pumps her fist into the air. You laugh as you and your squad head for the mess hall. 

****************************************************************************** 

The mess hall is loud but you’re grateful for the chance to be off your feet. Even today’s stew seems a tad more enticing as you take another bite. Eren’s been watching you since you left the titan course and Jean’s finally noticed.

“Yeager, keep your eyes to yourself.” Jean says slamming his fist on the table. It nearly sends Connie’s spoon to the floor but luckily Sasha catches it for him. Eren narrows his eyes at Jean and you sigh knowing all to well that an argument is about to start.

You peck Jean on the cheek and his face flushes red stopping any further nasty comment from leaving his mouth. You smile at him. “Thanks for looking out for me.” You say. “But I can protect myself. Besides, Eren’s concern isn’t something I really need protecting from.” Jean sputters but no words form and you laugh. You look to Eren who is rolling his eyes. 

“I don’t think you need much protecting with the way you fought today.” Armin chimes and you stare at the blonde. He smiles up at you. “I didn’t think anyone could take Captain Levi the way you did today.” 

You run a hand through your hair a little unnerved by his praise. “If you recall Armin, I lost today.” 

His smile grew. “But you held your own. That’s admirable y/n.”

“Thanks Armin.” You say taking another bite of your stew. Eren meets your gaze and a hint of a smile touches his lips.

“I just wish Captain Levi had shown you a little more lenience.” He says and you furrow your eyebrows. “I mean its only been a week since Annie attacked.” The group fell silent and you stare at the contents of your bowl. You no longer feel hungry. 

You hear a thud and look up to see Mikasa had hit Eren upside the head. “Eren.” She hisses and you notice all eyes are on you. You try to give them some sort of smile.

“It’s okay.” You say though you don’t necessarily feel that way. “After all, you can’t save the dead.” You find yourself echoing what the Captain had said to you the day prior and his words finally sink in. What he had said was true and the truth hurt. You sigh feeling just how hollow you are. “Besides I wouldn’t have met you guys if not.” The words are true enough but you know that its only a half measure. They were your squad but they weren’t. No one could fill the vacuum that Byron, Anton, and Rhys left behind. You smile half-heartedly. “Anyway, it’s six. I need to get to the Captain’s office before I get my ass handed to me again.” 

Eren nods and you say your farewells.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	5. Chapter 5

You step over the threshold of the Captain’s office. You’d barely had time to shower and change before you’d made it to his office and it was obvious by the way the fabric of your shirt dampens beneath the tail of your side braid. Levi sits at his desk scrawling across a piece of paper and once again isn’t looking up at you as you enter. 

“Captain?” You ask not sure what he wants you to do and feeling slightly uncomfortable just standing there in front of his desk. He looks up from his paperwork briefly. 

“There’s cleaning supplies in the cabinet over there.” He motions to the cabinet across the room but says nothing else. You sigh striding across the room to said cabinet. You open the doors and aren’t surprised to see that various cleaners and supplies are set in neat rows. You grab a rag and a spray bottle that smells faintly of lemons. You start dusting though perhaps you wouldn’t exactly call it dusting as there was almost no trace of dust or dirt anywhere in the office. You wipe down the bookshelf intrigued by some of the titles. It seems Levi enjoys reading in his spare time and not just boring history books either. You eye the spine of a fantasy romance and smirk at the thought of him curled up on the green couch in the corner reading it. You steal a glance his way and notice just how tired he looks. Dark circles ring his eyes and from this angle you can see the small bandage on his temple from where he’d been injured earlier today. You’d done that. You grip the rag tighter in your hand as you eye the tea kettle on the table near the fireplace. You sigh.

“Something wrong Private l/n?” He asks without looking up.

“Would you like some tea, Captain?” You ask. 

He looks back at you his dark hair falling into his eyes as he nods. “Sure.”

You’re not entirely sure why you had offered to make tea for him. Hell, the last time you’d made tea was when Rhys had been sick and that had been months ago. You convince yourself that you were only being logical. Tea meant sitting and getting off your feet. You grab the kettle, its already full of water, and you hook it above the fire.

You go back to dusting, sweeping the rag across the few shelves that litter the wall. There isn’t much on them. A few knives and two black picture frames. The first is a picture of Hange and Erwin with Levi sandwiched in between them. He looks seriously annoyed as Hange hangs on his shoulder and Erwin gives the slightest of smiles. Small print is scrawled in the bottom right corner and you can just make out “Happy 30th Shorty. Love, Hange & Commander Eyebrows”. You try to contain your laughter at Hange’s nickname for the Commander let alone Levi. You look at the other frame. This one holds a picture of a larger group of people. Levi is at its center surrounded by other members of the Corps. A girl with short ginger hair smiles with her hand on the Captain’s shoulder. A man with a bun smiles timidly to her right while another with dark hair sticks his tongue out behind Levi. Towards the back is a man with an undercut and a slight smirk. Even from the photo you can tell he’s trying to copy Levi’s appearance but no one can match those dark eyes or his near deadpan expression. You wonder if this was his previous squad. 

“Y/n. The water’s boiling.” Levi’s words grab your attention and you hear the screeching of the tea kettle. How the hell hadn’t you heard it before? 

“Sorry.” You say and it hits you that he’s just called you by your first name. You shake your head grabbing the kettle from the fire and pouring the hot water into two of the porcelain cups on the table. There’s a small canister in the middle of the table and you can only assume its tea leaves. You spot tea eggs clustered near the canister and quickly fill them with the leaves before lowering them into the cups of hot water. You nearly jump when Levi flops down on the couch across from you.

“Thanks.” He mutters grabbing the cup by the rim. It’s the weirdest way you’ve ever seen anyone hold their cup but you try not to focus on it as he puts his bare feet on the table. You’re surprised to see him without shoes. He yawns taking a sip of his tea and you grab your own cup cradling it in your hands. 

“Do you ever sleep?” You ask and he quirks an eyebrow.

“I’m not sure why my sleeping habits are any concern of yours.” He says taking another sip. 

“Sorry. You just look like shit.” You say.

He snorts. “Thanks. You truly have a way with words.”

You roll your eyes. “You know what I mean.”

He shrugs. “I sleep when I can.”

“I get that.” You say watching the steam roll off your cup. 

He looks up from his tea his eyes unreadable. “Y/n- “

“I didn’t realize we were on a first name basis.” You say and he looks like he might almost frown.

“Private l/n…” He tries again.

“Captain?” You ask.

He sighs. “Nevermind.” 

A moment passes and you’re starting to feel uncomfortable again. “Thanks for the bruises today.” You say trying to break the awkward silence. 

A hint of a smirk brushes his lips. “Anytime.” He gets up and walks back to his desk. You drink your tea noting that its now dark outside. You put the cleaning supplies back in their respective places and head for the door.

“I’ll see you tomorrow Captain.” You say waving over your shoulder though you’re sure he doesn’t see it. 

“L/n.” You turn towards him. He holds out a cream-colored envelope. “This is for you.” He says. You take the envelope. “See you tomorrow.” He says as you turn to leave.

Back in your room you pull the covers over your legs and stare at the envelope. You wonder what the hell could be in it. Was it a letter? Discharge paperwork? You take a deep breath before wrenching your finger beneath the lip of the envelope and tearing it open. Fabric brushes your fingers and you lift not one but three roughly cut out Survey Corp insignias from the envelope. You cover your mouth with your free hand as you take note of the blood spattered across the blue and white wings of liberty. Tears prick your eyes. You know they’re from your squad. You clutch them to your chest and you let yourself cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	6. Chapter 6

Weirdly, the next day everyone on your squad had the day off. It seemed Captain Levi was stuck in a meeting with Commander Smith and other high-ranking officials. You’d taken most of the day getting some much-needed rest until Sasha and Connie had come pounding on your door coercing you into joining the rest of your squad for drinks later that afternoon. 

You sigh checking yourself in the mirror. It was odd having to decide what you were going to wear out. It wasn’t that you particularly cared what you wore, you just didn’t want to appear too casual with the younger members of your squad. You sigh sweeping the last strand of hair into a messy bun at the crown of your head. You’d decided on a loose black button up with ¾ sleeves, grey slacks, and your boots. It was comfortable if a tad dressy for the tavern. You make a face at yourself in the mirror before heading for the door. 

It’s a short walk to the tavern from your quarters and you smell the place before you even step foot inside. It’s crowded and a little too loud but you immediately spot your squad and chuckle. It seems they started without you. Connie and Sasha are taking shots and Armin waves over to you his free hand wrapped around a flagon of what you can only assume is beer. You smile taking a seat between Jean and Eren. Both their cheeks are tinged pink and frankly it’s adorable. 

“Y/n!” Sasha yells a little too loudly. “You have to do shots with me and Connie!” 

You snort. “Okay. Okay.” A shot of whiskey is slid down the table and you lift it to your lips in unison with them. 

“To Squad Levi!” Connie says and everyone lifts their glasses. You down the shot feeling the whiskey burn down your throat. You wince and slam the shot glass back onto the table.

“Another!” You chime and you can see their faces light up. You down another shot and look at Eren whose eyes are wandering the room. Mikasa glares at the surrounding room and you wonder if her drinking has made her paranoid.

“It’s a shame the Captain isn’t here with us.” Eren says and you can’t help but laugh.

“Trust me, Eren. This is not Captain Levi’s scene.” You say and you know it’s true. Your squad had frequented the tavern especially after missions and you had never seen him there.

Eren sighs into his cup before taking a sip. “It’s kind of sad though don’t you think?” He asks and you can’t help but give him an awkward pat on the back. This poor boy has such a kind heart. 

“I’ll let the Captain know he has a fanboy.” You chuckle as you down another shot that Connie places in front of you. Eren gives you his best disgruntled look and you can’t help but smile.

“If anyone is a fanboy it’s Jean.” Eren says and you look at Jean. His chin is resting on the table as he cradles his flagon of beer in his hand. “For you, of course.” Eren winks and you nearly spit out the whiskey you’d just drank. 

“Is that right, Jean?” You ask and his eyebrows raise slightly.

“Fuck off.” He slurs and you pull the boy into a hug. 

“That’s sweet Jean, but you’re not really my type.” You say with a wink. Jean flicks you off and you laugh. 

“Then what is your type?” Eren asks and you blush slightly at his forwardness. 

“If I had to guess. Short, dark, and angry?” Jean says his eyes narrowed. 

You punch him in the shoulder. “Fuck off.”

“Make me.” He says. You put the boy into a loose choke hold.

“Hey, let me go!” He yelps. 

“Wait, you can’t really be suggesting the Captain?” Eren asks incredulously. 

“He isn’t suggesting the Captain.” You say rolling your eyes.

“Actually I am.” Jean says and you tighten your hold on him. “Let go!”

“It makes sense from my perspective.” Armin says and you stare at the boy feeling somewhat betrayed. 

“Not you too, Armin?” You ask finally releasing Jean who grumbles his displeasure into his flagon.

“I mean maybe he isn’t necessarily your type but you might be his.” Armin says and you stare at him floored by the words tumbling out of his mouth.

“You’re drunk, Armin.” You say taking another shot and this time enjoying the burning sensation.

“I mean clearly, y/n. But it makes sense to me. I mean how do you explain yesterday?” He says.

“He has a point.” Eren says.

“What the hell are you talking about?” You ask feeling that this evening had somehow taken a turn for the worse. You really wish they would stop pulling at straws.

“Y/n, the man was practically straddling you during practice yesterday.” Jean says and you knock him on the back of the head. “Ow!”

“Shut up already. There’s no way in hell and for any of you to think so is disturbing.” You say. 

“Y/n, he is tougher on you than any of us.” Sasha points out munching on a slice of bread.

“Yeah, because I’m a higher rank than all of you.” You say and they level you with disdainful stares.

“Mikasa?” You ask the dark-haired girl hoping for someone with any sense of clarity.

Her face screws up in distaste. “That’s disgusting.” She says and you feel a sense of relief.

“Thank you.” You say.

“But Mikasa has no sense of romance.” Connie finally chimes in. “I mean look at her following Eren around like a puppy dog.”

“Hey!” Mikasa yells swatting Connie who rubs the back of his head. Eren looks slightly sheepish.

You take another shot rolling your eyes. What had started as a fun evening had turned into an insane one. “Alright, well you guys have fun living in your delusions. I’m going to go back to the real world.” You say and you sway a little on your feet as you stand. 

“Whatever. Have a fun night in denial.” Jean yells after you as you stumble through the crowd. You nearly make it to the door when Hange grabs you by your arm.

“Y/n! I didn’t know you’d be here.” She says a little too loudly. Her cheeks are flushed and her laughter is more high pitch than usual. 

“I was just leaving Hange.” You say and she frowns. 

“Aw, and here I thought I’d get to spend some quality time with you.” She says and you try not to laugh at how much your superior is pouting right now. She sighs. “Fine. Fine. I have a favor to ask then.” She says and she takes off across the tavern. You see her return to a small group of Corps men and you only recognize Moblit, her right-hand man amongst the group. Hange was wrestling a bottle away from one of the other men and once she’d gotten it free, she prances towards you. “Can you bring this to Shorty? Please. Please.” 

You rub the back of your neck remembering all the heckling you’d just received from your own squad. “Um can’t you have anyone else take it to him?”

“No! It’s a secret mission.” She says. “And I only trust you.” 

You sigh as Moblit beckons Hange back to their group. “Fine.” You say.

“Oh, y/n! Thank you! You’re a lifesaver!” She says sweeping you into a hug. You pat her on the shoulder.

“Have fun Hange.” You say to her as she disappears back into the crowd. You look down at the bottle of whiskey in your hands and sigh once again. “Well this is going to be fun.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	7. Chapter 7

You’d contemplated every possible scenario. From leaving the bottle in the hall with a note to delivering it to him the next morning during practice which had been your stupidest idea. Yet none of them were practical. Damn Hange for giving you this task. This responsibility. You stared at the amber liquid and at the door to his office. 

“Fuck it.” You say under your breath and you go to knock on the door. The door creaks open at your touch and you stumble in. The room is dark but the fire is still lit in the fireplace and you can just make out Levi slumped in the green couch a book laying haphazardly across his lap. “Captain?” You ask and he doesn’t respond. You take a cautious step closer and see that he’s asleep. You stand there staring despite yourself. It’s the calmest you’ve ever seen him. Dark lashes like shadows across his pale cheeks and his hair falling dramatically over his lidded eyes. One muscular arm cradles his head and the other lays in his lap his fingers cradling the spine of the book still. 

Your face flushes red as you remember the Captain’s words from a few days ago. You like what you see?

You shake your head setting the bottle on the table in front of him. You walk to his desk grabbing a piece of paper and a pen. You scribble down that the bottle is from Hange and that he owes you for having to be a delivery girl. You sign your name and the pen slips from your grip clanking against the wooden floor. You hear a sharp intake of breath before you hear Levi’s footsteps. Before you can turn. Before you can even say anything you're pinned against the wall, your arm twisted behind your back.

“What are you doing here?” Levi’s harsh voice sends goose pimples up your arms. He twists your arm further and you yelp.

“Captain. Captain, it’s just me.” You say. 

His grip loosens. “Y/n?” He lets go of your arm and you take the opportunity to punch him in the chest. He takes a step back but it’s the only evidence he gives you that it even remotely hurt.

“You asshole.” You say rubbing your arm. 

He fixes you with a glare. “What the hell are you doing here?” 

“I don’t even know.” You say getting angrier by the second. “Why don’t you ask fucking Hange?” You yell before storming out of his office. 

You make it back to your room and you slam the door back on its hinges. “Fuck him.” You say looking down at the red marks he’d left on your arm. “Everyone is fucking crazy.” You yell to no one as you undress and slide into your night gown. You pull the covers over your head and close your eyes though the alcohol keeps you from any real sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	8. Chapter 8

You sigh waddling over to a water trough near the stables your calves burning from running laps since early morning. Your squad mates are all in some sort of disarray. Connie and Sasha sit back to back on the ground their breathing anything but normal.

“I’m dying.” Sasha says as she grabs her collar trying to fan air into her shirt. You roll your eyes at her melodrama as you dunk your hands into the trough.

“Oi, brat. What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Captain Levi struts towards your group and you can see everyone visibly stiffen. 

He’s in a hellish mood today. Seeing most of his squad lumber into the stables with hangovers that morning, he’d ordered everyone to run laps around the horse track they used for endurance with some measly excuse about sweating the alcohol out of their systems. You had been the only one to arrive not hungover, the alcohol had been purged from your system when you’d woken up at three in the morning and promptly thrown up in your bathroom.

“What does it look like Captain? I’m trying to cool myself down.” You say. He stiffens and stares at your submerged hands with disgust.

“That’s fucking disgusting.” He says and you raise an eyebrow. 

“I’m glad you think so Captain.” You say splashing your face with the water. It feels great against your burning skin.

He tuts before looking to the other squad members. “I hope you’ve learned your lesson.” He growls and they bolt to their feet fists over their hearts. 

“Yes Captain Levi, sir.” They say in unison. 

Without another word, he walks off and all of you are left standing there in confusion. 

“Does this mean we’re dismissed?” Eren asks as he catches his breath. 

You shrug starting the walk back to the barracks. They follow and weirdly Sasha is shadowing you. The boys drift off to their rooms and you stop by your room to grab clothes before heading to the showers. There’s barely anyone around and you strip off your sweat-drenched uniform and step into the cold water. Usually you’d despise the cold, but today you welcome it. You hear someone clear their throat and you nearly jump out of your skin as you realize Sasha is sitting outside the showers. 

“Christ, Sasha. You almost gave me a heart attack.” You say feeling mildly uncomfortable that she’d followed you here of all places. 

“Sorry y/n.” She says fixing her eyes to the ground. “Did something happen?” 

You rinse the shampoo from your hair before answering. “What do you mean?” 

“You seem a little angrier than usual.” She says and you sigh stepping out of the shower and into a clean towel. “I’ve never seen you like you were today. I mean you overtook Connie and I today while we were running.” You wrung out your wet hair before taking a seat beside her.

“Sorry.” You say. “I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”

“Is it about what we said to you yesterday? If so, I’m sorry. We were all being stupid. Especially Jean.” 

You chuckle. “It’s okay. We all had a little too much to drink.” 

Her brown eyes meet yours. “Though to be fair. I do think you might be able to wrench the stick out of the Captain’s ass.” 

“Sasha!” You laugh punching her in the shoulder. 

She giggles. “What?” She asks. “He seriously needs to unwind.” 

You shake your head. “That’s not in my job description.” You say before getting dressed. You rake your fingers through your h/c hair tying it into a loose braid. “Now how about we go and get some food before all the boys eat it all?” You ask and her eyes light up.

“Hell yeah!”  
***************************************************  
Dinner had been uneventful. Everyone had been exhausted from the day. So much so that even Eren and Jean hadn’t argued. Now you were on your knees in the Captain’s office scrubbing the baseboards. The smell of disinfectant was making you nauseous but you gritted your teeth and scrubbed harder. The sooner they were clean the sooner you could leave. Per usual Captain Levi hadn’t addressed you when you’d arrived and the room felt tenser than usual today. You drop the rag into the bucket and take a deep breath. 

“Captain, permission to get more water?” You ask knowing you’ll have to walk past his room to refill the bucket. You turn your head and see that he’s staring at you. Your ears turn red as you rise to your feet and his eyes roam over your figure before settling on your chest and then your face. He nods. You walk briskly to the bathroom bucket in tow. What the hell was that? You ask yourself as you fill the bucket with fresh water. You return to his office gulping as you pass the door to his room and you mentally kick yourself for even thinking about your squad’s comments at the tavern. When you come back into the office you notice Levi has moved to the couch. The whiskey you’d delivered sits on the table and you watch as he downs a shot. He sits legs crossed his eyes lifting to meet your e/c ones.  
“Care to join me?” He asks pouring another shot for himself. 

“I have baseboards to clean, sir.” You say standing a little straighter. 

He lifts an eyebrow. “They’re clean enough.” Your jaw nearly falls open.

“Who the hell are you and what have you done with Captain Levi?” You ask.

“Tch. Piss off.” He says and you can’t help but giggle as he downs the shot. You set the bucket down next to where you’d stopped and take a seat next to him. He pours you a shot and you smirk.

“Isn’t this a little hypocritical, Captain? After all, you did just have us run laps for drinking today.” 

He levels you with irritated slate eyes as he pours himself yet another shot. “Are you going to drink, or not?”

You grab the cup from the table. “Of course, I have to see what’s so great about this whiskey that I got man handled while delivering it.” 

“Enough, l/n.” He says.

You down your shot relishing in the fire it burns down your throat. “What? Do you not like being bitched at? I know the feeling.” 

“L/n.” He warns and you glare at him.

“I don’t understand where you get off, Captain. You beat the fuck out of your squad members. You inspire fear more than understanding or respect. Your squad is terrified of you, Captain. I do hope you know that.” You say.

“Enough!” He slams his cup down on the table and you flinch. He pinches the bridge of his nose. 

“What the fuck is your problem?” You ask and he looks like he wants to lash out at you. Like he’s ready to bite off your head, but instead he sighs. He looks more tired than usual and you wonder if he’s been sleeping at all. Maybe that was why he was in such an awful fucking mood.

“L/n, do you ever see them when you close your eyes?” He asks. His question confuses you.

“Who?” You ask and his eyes flick to the pictures on the shelf. “My squad?”

He nods.

You pour yourself some more of the whiskey and take a drink. “All the time.” You admit. “That female titan mocks me every night I try to go to sleep.”

“Annie Leonhart.” He says. His jaw twitches and you pour him a drink. He lifts the cup to his lips but he hesitates. 

“What were they like?” You ask. “The original Squad Levi?”

He takes a sip his finger stroking the cup as he thinks. “They were the biggest pain in the ass but I trusted them.” He says. 

You roll your eyes. “Their names, Captain?” 

“Petra Ral, Gunther Schultz, Eld Jinn, and Oluo Bozado.” He says his eyes distant. “Eld was my second in command. He was capable, generous, and he didn’t hold his drink well.” A ghost of a smile touches his lips. “Gunther was an insufferable romantic and he always had Petra’s back especially in arguments with Oluo.” You remembered Gunther slightly. He’d flirted with you once or twice but had been shut down immediately by Rhys.

“I’m assuming Oluo was the biggest pain in the ass?” You ask and he looks up at you with a pained expression. 

“He was. I wanted to beat his ass when he came down to breakfast one day with an undercut.” 

“I’m surprised you didn’t.” You say.

“He’s lucky Petra was there to plead his case.” He says finishing his drink.

“Sounds like she was your soft spot.” You say and he glares at you. You refill his cup and hide your face behind your own. 

“Petra was kind and hard-working. She was more of a soldier than Oluo could have ever hoped to be though I suppose her and Oluo were a little too much alike in the end.” You got the sense that there was something he was leaving out but you let it be. His eyes lifted from his cup.

“What about your squad?” He asks and you fill your cup to the brim before drinking. You grimace.

“Byron was an idiot.” You begin. “He could be highly inappropriate especially when he drank. One of us always had to babysit his ass but he also had our backs whenever we needed him.”

“I remember him.” He says. “He was an idiot but he was skilled in the field.” 

You chuckle. “Anton was a sweetheart. I swear he was a virgin with how red he got when Byron talked about any of the women in the Corps.”

Levi wrinkles his nose. “Or he could have just been respectable.” 

You laugh. “Or that. “You stare at your hands. They’re starting to tremble and you grip your cup tighter. 

“And Rhys was your brother.” He says and you nod.

“He was my center. My protector and confidant in this fucked up world, and to think I’m the one who convinced him to join the Survey Corps. I’m the one who got him killed.” 

You look up at Levi and are met by sad yet understanding eyes. He looks down at his hand that lays in his lap and you wonder what he’s thinking. You reach out to him your fingers brushing his forearm and you give his arm a gentle squeeze. He’s warmer than you expected. Human underneath your fingertips. 

“L/n.” He says.

“You can call me by my given name.” You say.

“Y/n, I’m sorry.” He says and you raise your eyebrows not sure you’ve heard him right. “About the other night. I didn’t know it was you.” 

“It’s fine.” You say. “Just lock your office door from now on, will you?”

He smirks. “Worried about me, now are you? Last I remember you were telling me to go fuck myself.” You retract your hand glaring at him. 

“Actually, I called you an asshole.” You say and he snorts.

“Same difference.”

You roll your eyes. “Shut up and pour us another drink, Captain.” You say and he chuckles. His features are a little softer and you wonder what the squad would think if they saw even a sliver of the man behind the mask. 

You raise your cup. “To our squads. Past and present.” You say.

You both drink.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	9. Chapter 9

You groan trying to get more comfortable. You have a slight crick in your neck and your eyes open as you prepare to fluff your pillow back into a more comfortable position. You blink as your eyes focus. This isn’t your pillow. Dark hair and the white collar of a shirt flood your field of vision. Your face reddens as you see the Captain’s slightly parted lips and feel his gentle breathing next to you. You feel like your heart is about to beat out of your chest. What the hell? 

Levi flinches and his eyes flutter open. He runs a hand through his hair and turns his head. His eyes widen as he notices you staring at him. “Fuck.” 

“Fuck indeed.” You say trying to push away from him. He quickly removes his arm from your shoulder. He rubs his temples before rising to his feet. He grabs the tea kettle and strikes a new fire. You watch him dumbstruck. You wake up the way you did and the first thing he thinks to do is make tea? You try to calm your breathing and look at anything but him. You notice the near empty whiskey bottle on the table and feel like punching yourself. 

“Fuck.” You hear Captain Levi say again and you glance his way. He’s staring out the window and its only then that you notice how bright it is outside. You should already be at the stables running drills. Both of you. 

You get to your feet. You wobble slightly before bolting for the door. You nearly crash into Hange as you sprint down the hallway.

“Y/n?” She asks. You slip past her.

“Sorry Hange! Can’t talk.” You call over your shoulder. You keep running until you reach your room. Luckily you hadn’t run into anyone else on your way back. You grab your uniform and rush to the bathroom and look in the mirror. You look like shit. Your eyes are a little red and your hair is beyond a mess. You cringe knowing that Captain Levi had seen you like this. “Ugh. What am I thinking? Get it together y/n. Get your ass in gear.” You say to yourself. You turn on the sink splashing your face and trying to scrub at any exposed skin. You reek of alcohol. You change into your uniform and when your hair doesn’t cooperate you growl in frustration, run your hands through it, and leave it to hang loose over your shoulders. Finally, ready, you rush to the stables.

When you arrive, you’re out of breath but happy to see that Captain Levi hasn’t arrived just yet. Mikasa gives you a weird look and Sasha tackles you with a hug. You groan as the impact makes you realize that your head feels like it wants to split open. 

“Y/n!” Sasha says. “I was looking all over for you this morning at breakfast. You overslept, huh?” 

You smile. “Yeah, I did.” You really hope she doesn’t smell you, but she smiles and teeters backward until she’s leaning against a fence post.

“At least you haven’t been waiting here for an hour, princess.” Jean says.

“Princess?” You ask.

Eren yawns. “Don’t mind him. He’s just pissed he couldn’t sleep in. We’ve been waiting for the Captain to arrive for an hour now.” 

You sit on the fence not trusting your body not to give you away. “Maybe he’s doing paperwork.”

Armin gazes at you and scratches the back of his head. “Maybe.” He says.

“Oi, brats. Get off your asses. We have drills to run.” Captain Levi’s voice scares the hell out of you as you bolt upright with the rest of your squad. You salute along with everyone else before he orders you all to go and tack up a horse. You catch a glimpse of him before you turn for the stables and he seems grumpier than usual. You wonder how much of a hangover he has as you reach the stall of your horse. You quickly brush him down, cinch the saddle, and slide the bit into his mouth making sure not to catch his ears as you loop the bridle over them. You lead your horse out and Eren falls in stride with you.

“You okay, y/n?” He asks. “You seem jumpy today.”

“I’m alright. I’m always a little nervous to get on these guys.” You lie patting your horse’s neck.

Eren gives you a small smile. “Well don’t be. You’ll do great.”

“Thanks, Eren.” You say as you fall in line with the rest of your squad.

Riding was a chore. Not only were you forced to endure the bouncing stride of your horse but you’d had to mount and dismount with your 3D gear which caused you to almost lose the contents of your stomach more than once. On top of that, the Captain was snappy today. He even barked at Mikasa who had mounted and dismounted almost perfectly. You sigh as you finally dismount from your horse. Your legs hurt and you’re exhausted.

“L/n, did I tell you that you were done with drills?” Captain Levi says from somewhere behind you. You take a breath before throwing him an exasperated look.

“No sir.” You say your head still pounding as he glares at you. You wonder if you’d imagined him being more relaxed the night before. 

He sighs looking at the rest of the squad. “You can have the rest of the day off.”

“Really?” Connie asks barely containing his excitement.

“Don’t make me change my mind, Springer.” Captain Levi says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	10. Chapter 10

Somehow, they had convinced you to go to the small market in town with them. You had wanted to go back to your quarters and get some real rest but had relented with the promise that you would hit the tea house first. You needed something to try to ease this awful headache after all. 

You and your squad walk down the road. Eren and Armin are engaged in a fervent discussion of the world beyond the wall. Mikasa follows behind them like a baby chick while Connie and Sasha are talking about all the food they want to try while you're out.

“Maybe they’ll have honey cakes! I miss honey.” Connie says and Sasha’s eyes widen in wonder.

Jean walks behind you and its starting to irritate you. You can feel his eyes on you and usually you’d let it slide but you really weren’t in the mood. “Jean, stop staring at my ass.” You say casting him a glance over your shoulder. His face goes red and he scowls.

“I wasn’t looking at your ass.” He says. 

You raise an eyebrow and stop walking. He runs into you and you wrap your arm around his shoulder leaning closer so that your face is inches from his. “Then you must have been daydreaming about me. Why don’t you walk in front of me before I give you something to daydream about, hm?” You lower your voice to a sultry purr. His ears are now red and his fawn-colored eyes betray the fact that he at the very least has been considering you in a sexual way. You sigh and kick him in the calf sending him reeling forward. He rights himself and casts you a hurt look.

“The hell, y/n?” He says rubbing the back of his neck. “You’re in one hell of a mood today.”

“It’s probably because she’s hungover.” Sasha chimes and you stare at her like she has a third head. So, she had noticed earlier. She chuckles. “That is why we’re going to the tea house isn’t it?” You’d reached the tea house as she finished speaking.

“Shut up, and let’s go in.” You say not looking any of them in the eye.

The tea house is simple if not quaint. There are maybe eight tables in the whole establishment and the woman serving tea is both polite and beautiful. You notice the boys blush as she serves them and you stifle a chuckle. A steaming cup of black tea is set before you and you finally let yourself relax. You take a sip relishing in its bitterness and hope that it’ll remedy your pounding head. 

“They don’t serve food here?” Sasha asks bewildered. She looks like she might cry.

“Sasha, it is a tea house.” Armin says to her and she just stares at him. You take another sobering sip of your tea.

“Is that the Captain?” Connie asks and you nearly spit your tea out. You cough and look at Connie.

“What?” You ask. He motions to a table in the corner and sure enough, Captain Levi is sitting there one hand gripping his teacup in his weird way and his head resting in his other hand. 

“He looks moody.” Connie says. 

“He’s always moody, Connie.” Jean says taking a tepid sip of his tea and sneering at it. 

“Y’know, I think he was actually trying to be nice today.” Connie says and you stare at the boy. “I mean usually he has us do drills till dinner.”

“Nice? He was barking at even Mikasa today.” Jean scoffs. Connie shrugs and takes a drink. 

Your eyes stray back to Levi. Was he being nice today? Maybe he had listened to you the night before about how hard he was on his squad. You bite your lip remembering how cruel you had been at the beginning of the night. It’s only when his slate eyes meet yours that you realize you’ve been staring. You avert your gaze and stare into your cup, hoping that your face isn’t red. You gulp down the rest of your drink and pull Sasha to her feet. 

“Come on! Let’s go find Sasha something to eat.” You say, putting money on the table, and she hugs you. You laugh as the group rises and heads for the door. You cast Levi one last glance and you swear you can see just a hint of a smirk as he sips his tea.

Sasha pulls you towards a vendor and she’s definitely drooling as she eyeballs all the fresh produce in the stall. Connie pries a carrot out of Sasha’s hands.

“You have to pay for it first, you idiot.” He says. She glares at him before she focuses in on something else. 

“Apples!” She says nearly toppling Connie over as she marvels over the red and gold fruit. “We have to get some!” 

“Ah, I see you’ve found my prime wares.” The shopkeeper says. He’s an older man with a bent back and a beard that is way too long in your book. “These are the last apples of the season. Swindled them from those fat merchants in Wall Sina myself.” You stare at the man wondering if it was wise for him to be openly talking about stealing from anyone within Wall Sina. You swear you’d seen at least three military police on your way through town. 

“I’ll take three!” Sasha says. Her eyes never leave the apples. 

The merchant smiles. “That’ll be ten coins a piece.”

“What?!” Sasha looks like she’s about to cry. “But I only have three coins left total.” She says and she desperately searches your group. No one looks her in the eye. You get it. All of you don’t get paid a lot for your services and spending it on fruit, even some as enticing as these apples, seems like a waste.

“No coin. No apples.” The merchant says glaring at everyone. 

You put a hand on Sasha’s shoulder. “Come on. Maybe we can find something else for you to eat.” You turn her preparing to walk to another stall but Hange blocks your path. Her hair is messy and weirdly there’s dirt on her uniform that looks a little too much like a boot print. You wonder if she’s been doing some weird experiment again. 

“Y/n.” She says your name, wearing a wolfish grin, and you’re not going to lie, she’s starting to freak you out.

“Um yes?” You ask letting go of Sasha. Hange slides into her place immediately wrapping a surprisingly strong arm around your shoulder. She pushes her glasses farther up on the ridge of her nose and stares at you a crazy glint in her eye. 

“I saw you leaving Shorty’s office this morning.” She says and your breath hitches. 

“What?” You can hear your squad mates say behind you. You don’t even want to know what their faces look like right now.

“Did you guys let off some steam last night?” She asks wiggling her eyebrows. “God knows, he needs to.” Your face flushes and you push her away.

“No!” You say your voice coming out higher pitched than you want it to. “Dear god, no!”

Hange’s smile grows and you feel like you’re having heart palpitations. You can see Eren’s surprised face behind her and your face only flushes a deeper red. “I know you spent the night.” She says. “I heard you talking with him last night.”

You glare at her and she waves it off.

“I had a report I was going to deliver to him.” She explains. “I just decided to wait till this morning instead, and I caught you running out of there looking like a hot mess.”

You really want the ground to open and swallow you at this point. Sasha is giving you a thumbs up. You rub your temples trying to think of how best to explain what happened without Hange getting anymore of a wrong idea.

“We got drunk.” You say immediately kicking yourself as Hange’s eyes widen.

“Oh, well I suppose-“

You cut her off. “No. Nope. We just had drinks and talked.”

“Then why were you leaving his office this morning?” She asks.

“I…we sort of fell asleep.” You say. You remember how peaceful he looked this morning and look at your boots not wanting to see anyone’s reactions to what you’d said.

“I see.” You hear Hange say. “Well that’s less exciting.”

“Shouldn’t you be happy that y/n didn’t sleep with her superior?” You hear Eren ask baffled.

You look up and see Hange sigh. “Honestly, I was just hoping he had some sort of physical or emotional connection with anyone.” She says. “He keeps walling himself off to others. Especially after the female titan attacked.” You bite your lip. Though you were annoyed at the way she’d just embarrassed you in front of your squad, you were touched that she genuinely cared about Levi. You wonder if he even knows that he has her in his corner rooting for him. Hange rubs the back of her neck before fixing you with a smile. “Anyway, y/n keep cracking at that rough exterior of his. Eventually he might just invite you back to his quarters.” She winks at you.

You can’t help it. You punch her in the shoulder and she stumbles backward laughing. “Anyway, see you around.” She waves and turns back towards the barracks. You watch her leave before turning back to your squad. Mikasa is giving you a disapproving look and you choose to ignore her. Jean though is smirking.

“What’s your problem?” You ask him. 

His smirk widens. “Nothing. It just explains why you and the Captain were late for drills this morning.”

“Fuck you, Kirstein.” You say. Your poor face can’t take much more of this taunting.

“Y/n.” Eren says and you look at him. He seems worried. “I don’t think you should report for your cleaning duties.” 

“Why?” You ask.

He looks up at you and you notice he doesn’t just look worried. He looks a little angry too. “I just don’t want him taking advantage of the situation.”

You sigh kicking at the dirt with your boot. “Eren, I’m a big girl. I can take care of myself.” You say. “Besides if I don’t show up for cleaning duties, Captain Levi might actually kill me tomorrow during drills. I think I’ll take my chances scrubbing baseboards.” Eren doesn’t look satisfied with your answer but you decide you’ve had enough of this conversation. “Now are we going to find some food for Sasha or are we going to endure her whining until dinner?” You ask.

“Hey! I do not whine.” She says. Connie and Armin give her pointed looks. “Okay, fine. I whine a little. I can’t help it.” 

You notice Jean is still staring at you but you turn and walk off towards one of the more frugal looking vendors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any theories as to why Hange has a boot mark on her clothes? :D


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all are enjoying this! Also if you haven't listened to Call Your Name or So Ist Es Immer (English Cover) from Attack on Titan please do (I'll put their links in the comments). They were a huge inspiration for me to write this fic.

You scrub vigorously at the baseboards. Your hands hurt and sting with disinfectant but you don’t care. You’ve kept your eyes glued to them for the past half hour and you were going to keep it that way. You’d had enough teasing and enough weird thoughts floating through your head today. Now you just wanted to clean these damn baseboards and go to bed. 

“Something on your mind, brat?” Levi asks from behind you and you scrub harder. “You’re quiet today.”

“No.” You say dunking the rag back into the bucket before scrubbing some more. You’re thankful that he doesn’t say anything else. You hear footsteps and assume he’s walking to the bookshelf, only to have the daylights scared out of you when he squats down beside you grabbing the hand that you’re holding the rag in.

“Oi, if you keep scrubbing like that, you’re going to end up making yourself bleed.” He says. You slap his hand away and shuffle backwards nearly knocking the bucket over in the process. 

He’s unfazed by your outburst whereas you feel incredibly embarrassed. What the hell were you doing?

“Want to talk about it?” He asks.

You stare at the floor. “With no disrespect, Captain, I don’t particularly care to share my personal issues with you.”

“I see.” He says getting back to his feet and you can’t lie to yourself that you’re not slightly mesmerized by how fluid his movements are. “L/n, you’re dismissed for today.” He says walking back to his desk and beginning to rifle through his pile of reports. “Leave the bucket there. I’ll clean it up when I’m done here.” 

You stand and head for the door. You feel the Captain’s eyes on you as you leave and you feel a little guilty. It wasn’t his fault that people had been teasing you about him. You sigh wishing you hadn’t run into Hange earlier. Maybe then your brain would be able to shut off and you wouldn’t be so damn jumpy. You groan and head for your room hoping that sleep will reassemble your jumbled mind.

******************************************************************************************************************

You wake up the next morning feeling a little better and you decide to skip breakfast. Though you know it’s selfish, you don’t really want to deal with your squad, let alone you have an errand you need to run before drills. You make your way to the tea house just as the doors open and buy a batch of chamomile tea. You figure it was a decent enough apology gift for acting like an ass the day before. Besides maybe it would actually help him sleep. 

You drop the tea off in your quarters before making your way to the training grounds. When you arrive, you find that you’re the first one there. You sit in the shade tucking your knees under your chin. You watch leaves dance around you in the breeze. Today might just be a good day, you think to yourself. You hear footsteps approaching and you look up to see Captain Levi has arrived. He eyes you as he goes to lean against a tree opposite you to presumably wait for the rest of the squad.

“Feeling better today, brat?” he asks and you look up at him genuinely surprised at his question.

The wind is playing with his hair and it’s a little hard to focus on something meaningful to say, so instead you nod. 

He smirks. “Good, then I won’t feel bad kicking your ass today.” He says, his eyes glinting mischievously. 

You frown and are about reply when he steps out from under the tree to face the rest of your squad as they approach. You get up, dusting yourself off before joining them. Eren and Jean give you weird looks but you ignore them saluting as Captain Levi begins to speak.

“Today, all of you will be fighting me.” He says. 

“What?” Jean asks and Levi shrugs. You can see something close to fear shimmer in Eren and Armin’s eyes. Mikasa, on the other hand, is smirking and you stifle a chuckle. You know she’s been waiting for this day for a long time. 

“Are there any rules, Captain?” Armin asks and Levi shakes his head.

“None.” He says.

You can feel the exhilaration from your squad and you kind of feel bad for the Captain. You hope he knows just how much of a bad idea this might have been on his part. 

By the end of drills, everyone seemed a little more at ease. Mikasa was absolutely glowing. She’d somehow managed to get a good punch in and even you had winced when her fist had connected with the Captain’s jaw. Now that you thought about it, everyone had gotten a decent amount of hits in. Even Sasha who didn’t have the best form. You wonder whether the Captain had let them hit him on purpose. Though you weren’t so sure given how many times you had landed on your ass and by the number of sore spots you knew would blossom into bruises later. Your squad and the Captain part ways out of breath and tired, and you're beyond grateful to be heading to the showers to soothe your aching muscles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Leave me a comment :)


	12. Chapter 12

You knock on the door to the Captain’s office. You hear grumbling from the other side and rolling your eyes you open the door. You immediately wish you hadn’t as Levi stands in front of his desk buttoning up his shirt. You nearly drop the canister of tea you’d brought as he looks at you an eyebrow raised. 

“Captain.” You say as a way of greeting setting the canister on his desk. He smells like soap and you can tell by the way his hair is slightly sticking to his forehead that he’d just recently showered. You blush slightly before turning for the cabinet. You needed to get cleaning before this situation got anymore awkward. 

“What’s this?” he asks.

“It’s nothing.” You say.

“Nothing?” He asks and you can hear him tinkering with the container. You grab a spray bottle and rag and head for the windows. “Tea?”

“It’s chamomile.” You say spraying the window. 

“Oi, brat. Look at me when you’re talking to me.” You bite your lip before turning toward him. His expression is unreadable as he stares at you. “And why do I need more tea?”

“I thought it might help you sleep.” You admit. “Plus, I was being an ass yesterday.” 

He rolls his eyes. “Still concerned about my sleeping habits, are you?”

“Would you just shut up and say thank you?” You say and he snorts before setting it next to his canister of black tea. You expect him to return to his paperwork but he slumps down onto the couch eyeing you. “Can I help you, Captain?” 

“Just shut up and clean the damn windows, l/n.” He says with a playful smirk and you almost throw the spray bottle at him. Rolling your eyes, you do just that. You can feel his eyes on you and you wonder just what is going through that insufferable man’s head. You finish the first quarter of the pane of glass when you hear him hiss in pain behind you. You whip your head around and see him massaging his jaw with his fingers. It’s where Mikasa struck him. You can just barely see the red bruise beginning to form from where you stand. You set the bottle and rag down before walking to the bathroom. You know you’d seen some ointment there. Spotting the small tin box, you grab it before taking a seat next to him. You open the box and the smell of frankincense hits you. “What are you doing?”

You hesitate at his question. “Permission to tend to your wounds, Captain?” You ask your fingers already submerged in the ointment. He furrows his eyebrows before sighing.

“Permission granted.”

You can tell he’s uncomfortable as you rub the salve into the bruise at his jawline. It’s bigger than you expected and you roll your eyes knowing that Mikasa would be happy to see it turn purple. He flinches as you brush his neck. You put a hand to his shoulder to steady yourself and he hisses again. You stare at him. Just how many bruises does he have? 

“Shirt. Off.” You say and he glares at you.

“Excuse me?” He says.

You roll your eyes. “Take off your shirt. I know you have more bruises than just the one Mikasa gave you here.” You flick the bruise to prove your point and he grabs your wrist just a little too tightly. You glare at one another. “Captain, I’m not particularly interested in what’s beneath your shirt. I’m just interested in getting ointment on your bruises. Unless you want to look like you’ve been struck by the plague.” 

He lets go of your wrist and rolls his eyes. “Pain in my ass.” He mutters as he starts to unbutton his shirt. You know your cheeks are turning pink and you avert your gaze trying to calm your trilling heart. He flicks you in the forehead. “Can we get this over with, brat? I have paperwork to do.” 

You look at him and you grit your teeth to keep your expression from changing. “Impatient ass.” You say as you move closer to him trying to keep your eyes from openly staring at his lean yet well-muscled torso. You can just make out faint white scars on his skin. You’d seen shirtless guys before. Plenty of shirtless guys before. Hell, you’d practically seen all your old squad mates naked at some point or other. You blush. Y/n, where the fuck is your head going? You ask yourself. You put more ointment on your fingers and reach for a bruise forming on his collar bone.

“Shit.” He says flinching at your touch.

“Sorry.” You mutter quickly rubbing it in and moving on to the next. With each bruise he flinches and you wonder how someone who’s this much of a baby could be the strongest soldier that the Survey Corps has. You chuckle.

“Something funny, l/n?” He asks. He’s clenching his jaw and you immediately shake your head.

“Nope.” You say putting ointment on another. “Though I will say it was pretty clever of you to let your squad beat the shit out of you.”

He scoffs. “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.”

You lift your eyebrows and purposefully jab him in one of the bruises you know Sasha left. “Uh huh, sure.” 

“God dammit, woman.” He says getting up from the couch. “I have half a mind to tell Erwin to enlist you as a professional torturer.” He swiftly buttons his shirt and you frown.

“That’s not funny.” You say.

“Go wash your hands and finish cleaning the windows.” He says. “I have shit to do.”

You roll your eyes before getting up from the couch. “I’m so sorry for wasting your time, Captain.” You say your voice thick with sarcasm. You do just as he asks though. 

Halfway through your cleaning, you put the kettle on. The sun is setting outside and you stop to appreciate the way it caresses the shops and barracks with thin shadows. Your eyes follow the trail of shadows until they reach Wall Rose. You shiver. Sighing, you resume your work. When the kettle whistles you pour hot water into one of the porcelain cups. You add the chamomile leaves and set it on his desk before cleaning up. 

“See you tomorrow, Captain.” You say. “And I’ll beat your ass if you don’t drink that.” You point to his cup and give him your best glare.

He smirks. “I’d like to see you try.” 

You flick him off before running out the door. Today hadn’t been a bad day at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think? Let me know in the comments :)


	13. Chapter 13

You arrive at the training grounds surprisingly well-rested. Captain Levi hasn’t arrived but everyone seems a little livelier this morning. Eren and Connie are in the middle of a play scuffle, both boys grinning ear to ear. Mikasa watches Eren’s form and when he sends Connie tumbling backwards, she smiles. Armin is drawing in the dirt with a broken branch he’d found and Sasha is munching on a hard-boiled egg she’d managed to snag from the kitchens watching the boys wrestle. Jean walks up to you and throws his arm around your shoulder. Usually the gesture would bug you but today you are in too good of a mood.

“Two idiots fighting, the perfect way to start off the day.” He says rolling his eyes. He’s smiling though and you can’t help but chuckle. 

“Aw, are you jealous, Jean? I’m sure if you ask nicely, they’ll let you play.” You say and he just barely gives you a glare. 

“Oi, Kirstein. Keep your disgusting paws to yourself.” Your eyes dart to the familiar voice. Captain Levi walks towards your group. Jean smirks, tugging a loose strand of your hair before moving away from you. You swear you can see the Captain’s jaw twitch. The rest of your squad straightens in his presence and you salute with the rest of them as he draws closer. You search the Captain’s expression. For the most part it’s unreadable but you can just make out that the dark circles under his eyes are just a bit fainter today. You smile, it seems the tea had helped. “Today we’ll be sparring again.” He begins. “Pick your partners. Whoever wins your spar will be fighting me.”

“Excuse me sir, but how is that a reward?” Sasha says. 

Captain Levi narrows his eyes at her. “Who said anything about a reward? Stop wasting my time, Blouse. Get into positions.”

You pair off with Jean. You bring your fists up close to your center and face him as he begins to circle you. His eyes are narrowed in concentration and you smile. He might just put up a real fight today. He strikes, weaving towards you and feigning a punch to your shoulder. You dodge kicking out at his legs but you miss as he wraps his leg around yours sending you sprawling backwards. You try to right yourself but he punches you in the gut. Dirty cheat, you think to yourself as he pins you to the ground. His elbow is digging into your stomach and his face is just a little too close. 

“Got you, y/n.” He says smirking. 

“Damn, it seems you do.” You say. You can feel his other hand hovering at your side. You smirk grabbing his hand and placing it just at the sliver of bare skin at your stomach where your shirt had ridden up. His eyes widen. Poor fool, you think before you head butt him. 

“What the fuck, y/n?” He says grabbing his head and you take the opportunity to roll both of you over. You pin his hands at his side, straddling him. His face is beyond red. 

“What was that you were saying?” You ask him a smirk planted on your face.

“Just get off, y/n.” He says and you do just that. He dusts himself off avoiding looking at you. As you brush yourself off, you look up to see the Captain scowling at you two before he turns his attention to the last spar between Mikasa and Sasha. Surprisingly, Sasha has been able to hold her own for this long and you wonder if she’s been practicing. She gets another hit in on Mikasa before she’s sent flying. She rolls through the dirt, groaning as she clutches her stomach. 

“Get up, Blouse.” Captain Levi orders her but she tucks her legs in on herself.

“I’d rather stay down, sir.” She says casting a terrified look toward Mikasa. 

Levi sighs. “All right, let’s begin then.”

The fight between Mikasa and the Captain is intense. You can barely make out their individual hits and surprisingly, her skill seems to be up there with his. She’s holding her own, that is until he gives her a swift, hard kick to the head and she topples.

“Mikasa!” Eren yells and Captain Levi sends him sprawling as well when he launches himself forward in her defense.

The Captain glares down at Eren. “Consider your match forfeit for that outburst, Yeager.”

Eren glares up at him. Mikasa looks a little dazed as she sits up clutching her head but otherwise fine. The Captain turns his attention to you. “L/n, you’re up.” You see Eren help Mikasa up out of the corner of your eye as you square off with the Captain. There’s just the faintest sheen of sweat on the Captain’s forehead and you roll your shoulders willing yourself to relax into your stance. He makes the first move aiming low. You dodge wheeling around him and are just barely able to block his next blow. He’s fast. 

It becomes a rhythm: dodge, try to get a hit in, and block. That is until his knee connects with your stomach and the air is knocked out of you. He takes the opportunity to pin you, your hands over your head and his hips straddling you. His breath is ragged on your cheek, and you squirm beneath him involuntarily. He’s too close and your mind is straying to how warm his body is against yours and the nervous flutter in your stomach rather than a way to escape your current situation. 

“And here I was hoping you’d put up more of a fight.” He says his voice low, only for you. Your eyes snap to his. They seem darker than usual and the way he’s smirking causes that nervous flutter in your stomach to resurface. 

“Don’t think you have me beat just yet, Captain.” You say and he arches an eyebrow. You give him a smirk of your own as you wrap your legs around his hips. His eyes widen as you twist your lower half sending him onto his back and underneath you. He looks up at you disgruntled, jaw clenched. He’s glaring at you but you can’t help but chuckle. 

Someone clears their throat and you both look to the source. Commander Erwin stands nearby. His expression blank as he takes in you and Captain Levi. You sit up and Levi sends you hurtling into the dirt. Shocked, but more so embarrassed for being caught on top of the Captain by the Commander of all people, you get up and hurry back to the rest of your squad. Your face is flushed. Captain Levi dusts himself off, before eyeing the Commander. 

“What do you want?” He asks and you're slightly surprised by his nonchalance.

“Levi, I require your immediate attention. Follow me.” He says and turns to leave. The Captain sighs, sauntering after him.

“Your dismissed, brats.” He says over his shoulder.


	14. Chapter 14

You eat dinner in awkward silence. No one mentions your spar with the Captain which makes you feel even more awkward and uneasy. Even Jean is quiet. It seems he’s avoiding you as he sits next to Mikasa and Armin instead. 

You take another bite of soup before excusing yourself for cleaning duties. Eren casts you a troubled look but doesn’t say anything. Sasha, on the other hand, rises with you. You both walk and dispose of your trays. She follows you out into the hall.

Sasha throws you a smile. “So, I have some amazing news.” She says. You look at her and she’s positively beaming.

“What’s that?” You ask.

She grabs you by the shoulders and you realize that she isn’t beaming, she’s downright giddy. “Connie asked me out.” She says a faint blush touching her cheeks. “I mean we were sparring and he asked me to go into town with him on our next day off.” She says. “So, I think he asked me out.” 

“That definitely sounds like a date, Sasha.” You tell her. Her smile grows and you’re genuinely happy for her. Who knew Connie had any romantic feelings for your weird but lovable friend?

“I wonder what kind of food we’ll have while we’re out.” She mutters and you chuckle. It breaks her from her thoughts and she fixes you with a pointed stare. “So, can we talk about your spar with the Captain today?” She asks and you’re relieved by both the fact that someone is willing to talk to you about it and that she hasn’t broken into teasing you immediately.

“I’m not really sure what to say about it.” You say rubbing the back of your neck. 

“That was intense, y/n.” She says. “Are you sure nothing is going on there?”

“Nothing is.” You say and you wonder why you’re slightly disappointed by your own answer. “I mean we’re at each other’s throats mostly, but he’s almost nice sometimes.”

Sasha makes a weird face and you raise your eyebrows. “I can’t imagine the Captain being nice.” She admits and you laugh. 

“He’s different than I expected.” You admit to her.

“How so?”

“He cares more than he lets on.” You start. “He was nice enough to send me home early from cleaning duties when I was upset from Hange’s bullshit.” 

“You told him about that?” She asks.

“Hell no!” You say. “He’ll never know about that conversation. It’s bad enough I’ve seen the man shirtless, well nearly shirtless. There’s no way I’m going to let him know that Hange thought we’d...well you know.”

“Wait, hold up. What? Did you just say you’ve seen Captain Levi shirtless?” She yelps and you swat her shoulder.

“Sasha! Be quiet.” You say and she furrows her eyebrows. 

“Nope, I’m not letting that slide especially when you just said nothing is happening between you two. Explain. Now.”

“I was just tending to the bruises we’d all left on him from that day he let us beat the shit out of him.” You say and she raises her eyebrows. 

“Um, y/n, I hate to break it to you, but guys don’t just let you see them shirtless for the hell of it.” She says.

“It wasn’t like that Sasha.” You say as you both turn the corner. 

She shrugs. “If you say so, y/n. But with your new information and today’s spar, I’d definitely say he’s at least interested in you.” 

“I highly doubt that.” You say though your stomach churns anxiously at her words. “Any way, I need to head out. But I’m so happy for you and Connie.” You say. 

She smiles. “Thanks, and best of luck with the Captain.” She winks before you head for his office.

You reach the Captain’s office and though you knock no one answers. You wonder if he’s still in a meeting with the Commander when you hear something on the other side of door fall and shatter. You throw the door open and see him slumped on the floor. 

“Shit.” He says as he stares down at the porcelain cup broken on his right. He looks rumpled. The top three buttons of his shirt are open, his hair is disheveled, and you note a half of a bottle of whiskey sitting next to him on the floor. He stares at the broken cup before trying to pick up a shard. He hisses on contact pulling his hand away. “Fuck you.”

You rush to his side before he decides it’s a good idea to pick up another piece. He smells strongly of alcohol and his eyes take a moment too long to really focus on you. 

“Y/n?” He asks.

“Captain, let me clean this up.” You say rising to your feet and going to grab the broom.

“No, I can.” He tries to rise as well and nearly falls. He braces himself against the wall before sliding back to the ground. 

“Don’t touch it.” You say rushing over and quickly brushing the broken pieces into the dustpan. Thankfully, there weren’t many small shards. You dump it into the bin before taking a seat next to him on the floor. You grab the bottle and slide it next to the couch. “I think you’ve had enough to drink, Captain.” He glares at you but doesn’t say anything. His arms rest on his knees and he’s staring at the ceiling, and you wonder why the hell he chose now to get drunk.

“Want to talk about it?” You ask and he sighs deeply running a hand through his hair.

“We’re going back out beyond the wall.” He says and your eyes widen.

“When?” You ask. 

“Tomorrow.” He says and he slams his fist against the floor. You flinch. “I’m not ready. I can’t save them, y/n.”

“Who?” You ask. It’s heartbreaking to see him like this. He’s miserable.

“Eren Yeager, Mikasa Ackerman, Armin Arlert, Jean Kirstein, Sasha Blouse, Connie Springer, you. I can’t keep you all safe.” He admits as he glares at the floor.

You bite your lip before kneeling in front of him. You take his hands in yours. “Captain, look at me.”

He looks up slowly and you can see the fear and guilt in his dark eyes. “You don’t have to. You’ve given us all the tools to survive out there.” You say. 

“But is that enough?” He asks and your heart squeezes. Is it? “It wasn’t enough for them.” He glances towards the photo of his old squad. You wonder how many times a day he looks at that photo. How often he dredges up the same guilt he’s showing you now. You sigh, grasping him by his elbows to try and get him to his feet. 

“It has to be.” You say as you sling his arm over your shoulder.

“What are you doing, y/n?” He asks as he sways nearly knocking the both of you over.

“If we’re going out beyond the wall tomorrow, you need your rest.” You say as you walk him to his room. It’s meticulously clean, even the bed sheets are crisp and tucked in at every corner. You guide him into bed and once his head is on his pillow and you push his legs onto the bed, you turn to leave. He grabs your wrist, stopping you. 

“Y/n. Stay.” He says quietly. “Please.”

You’d never heard him even utter the word please. You take a deep breath, nodding before kicking your boots off and taking the other side of the bed, your back to him. You lay like that in the dark, your breathing uneven. Just what were you doing? You feel his warm hand on your waist and he pulls you so your back is flush to his chest. You stiffen. You can feel his hot breath through the back of your shirt and it makes your skin tingle. Your heart is doing somersaults in your chest as you try to relax. He’s drunk, y/n, you tell yourself, just let him have this. 

You sigh, gripping the corner of the pillow in your hand. Sasha’s words come back to you from earlier and you bite your lip. Just what am I to you, Captain? You ask yourself as you finally close your eyes. The rhythm of his breathing is starting to soothe you. “Good night, Captain.” You whisper into the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think in the comments :)


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter but I figured all you amazing readers deserved a little more than what I left you with. Hope you enjoy and I'll see you all on the other side of Wall Rose <3

You awake to the warm glow of the sun. Your eyes flutter open and you nearly gasp as you remember where you are. You’re still in the Captain’s bed and in the night, you’d turned to face him. A blush creeps over your cheeks as he readjusts, his fingers brushing over the bare skin of your arms. Your stomach clenches into knots as you stare at his sleeping face. His hair is in his eyes and you reach out to brush it away. He flinches at your touch but doesn’t wake and for some reason this makes you bolder. You run your thumb along the sharp line of his jaw, your eyes lingering on his lips. 

“Why me?” You whisper withdrawing your hand. You take a deep breath before grasping his arm gently. You shuffle out of his arms, sitting on the edge of the bed as you pull on your boots. You cast one last glance at Levi before going to the office. You know you should be heading back to your room, preparing yourself for your mission, but you linger. You strike a fire in the fireplace and the pungent smell of smoke is sobering. Filling the tea kettle with water, you put it over the fire. You gravitate towards the shelves and you pick up the picture of the former Squad Levi. You run your thumb over the frame. 

“Eld, Gunther, Oluo, Petra. I’ll try to keep him safe.” You say. The tea kettle is beginning to whistle. You set the photo down and remove the kettle from the fire. You make his black tea and put a saucer over the top to keep the heat from escaping. Sighing, you walk to the door. “I’ll see you later, Captain.” You say though you know he can’t hear you.

**********************************************************************************************  
Once you’d made it back to your room, you’d quickly freshened up. You changed into your uniform, checking your harness to make sure it was secure and lessening the chances of you falling to your death out in the field. Harness checked; you’d quickly ate breakfast before meeting your squad at the stables. It seemed Captain Levi had sent out correspondence to all of them the night before.

Everyone is fidgeting and it’s feeding your anxiety. Eren is pacing back and forth and you can tell it’s making his poor horse distraught. Armin, on the other hand, keeps rubbing circles into his horse’s neck to soothe himself more than the beast. 

Sasha and Connie are talking off in the corner in low voices and you notice Jean’s knuckles are white as he grips the reigns of his horse. The only person who looks remotely calm is Mikasa. But even she keeps glancing at Eren, her expression troubled. 

You take a deep breath and relax just a little bit as Captain Levi emerges from the stables, his black gelding trailing behind him. He mounts his horse and you all follow suit. Your mare is a tad jumpy and you try to relax your muscles hoping to calm her down. It seems to work. You watch the Captain as he eyes the gate of Wall Rose. His expression is blank but you can tell from his eyes that he’s just as anxious as you are. 

“Let’s go.” He says and kicks his horse into a lope. You follow suit and you hold your breath as the massive gate of Wall Rose creaks overhead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think in the comments :)


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we go. Lord, writing this was hard but so fun. Hope you all enjoy this little tidbit and a little bit more of Jealous! Levi. xD

It had been a hard day’s ride from Wall Rose. On your way, you’d only encountered a few titans and luckily, they’d been far enough off that they hadn’t noticed your squad. You and your squad had ridden for what felt like hours until you’d reached the old Survey Corps outpost. 

Outpost was a loose term as the stone building was crumbling and you felt a little bad stalling your horse in what could barely be called a stable with its patchwork roof and shabby walls. On the bright side, the outpost’s well still seemed to work and Captain Levi took advantage of the source of water making you all clean the dingy rooms you’d be sleeping in for the night. You didn’t mind the hard work as it took the edge off your jumbled nerves.

Eren and Mikasa were stationed in the common area cleaning the floor and the leaning dining table and chairs. Sasha and Connie had taken the kitchen and once clean, began unpacking the rations for dinner. You can hear Connie’s voice rise in the kitchen and chuckle knowing that Sasha is probably pilfering food for herself. Armin had started cleaning the room you and the rest of your squad would be sleeping in and Captain Levi was somewhere above keeping watch.

You and Jean are cleaning what would be the Captain’s room for the evening and you hit Jean with your rag as you notice him just barely scrubbing the floor. 

“Jean, you’d better scrub harder. I really don’t feel like being here all night doing it over again.” You say. Jean doesn’t answer as he continues to absently clean the floor. You scoot closer waving your hand in front of his face. “Jean, earth to space cadet?” 

Jean’s fawn eyes refocus and he frowns.

“Did you hear me?” You ask. 

“Y/n…” He starts but he doesn’t finish his sentence. Instead he grabs your wrist and kisses you. His lips are soft but awkward and you’re genuinely shocked. When Jean pulls away you frown. His eyes search your face for anything and you sigh.

“Jean…” You say.

He takes a deep breath and loosens his grip on your wrist. “It’s fine, y/n.” He says. “I just had to get that out of my system. Especially being out here.” He half-heartedly scrubs the floor and you feel like crying. How is it these men expect so much out of you and yet you feel like you can’t give them enough? You can’t help them, but you want to so badly. You want to make them happy. To keep them safe.

You take a deep breath steeling your nerves before you pull Jean closer kissing him again. It doesn’t mean anything to you but it means everything to him and knowing that he could die out here beyond the walls, you’re willing to give him this. You pull away and Jean gives you a bashful smile. Your about to order him back to cleaning when you notice the Captain standing in the door frame, his expression livid. If Levi had the power to smite you, you both would have been struck dead, right there and then. 

“I didn’t realize that my room would be used for such disgusting behavior.” Captain Levi says his voice taut with anger. Jean stiffens finally realizing that he’s there. You both rise to your feet and Jean starts fumbling with his words. “I don’t give a shit what you have to say for yourself, Kirstein. Get the fuck out of my room.” He looks to you and it feels like he’s physically stabbed you. The hurt and anger directed at you in that gaze is enough to crush you. “You too, l/n. Get the hell out.” You both sidle past him and you can see his knuckles are white as he clenches his fists.

“Captain- “You start. You want to explain yourself. You want to calm him down. 

“Don’t you dare say anything, l/n.” He says and you can tell despite his harsh words that he’s trying to keep himself in check. You glare at him angry at his reaction but you turn to go help Armin. You hear the door slam behind you and you swear you hear a hollow thud from the room. 

Taking a deep breath to quell your own anger and discomfort, you join Jean and Armin in an awkward attempt at cleaning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reader is such a kind person <3 But I'm so looking forward to her dealing with Levi's wrath xD


	17. Chapter 17

You finish cleaning the room just in time for a simple dinner of bread and roasted vegetables. You sit at the table with everyone except the Captain, who at some point had stormed off to keep watch again. 

Armin spears a carrot as he eyes you and Jean. “What happened earlier with Captain Levi?” He asks and you look at Jean. 

He finishes chewing a mouthful of food before replying with a shrug. “He wasn’t happy with our cleaning.” 

Armin doesn’t seem completely convinced but he drops it. You push around your food on your plate glancing at the stairs that lead to the battlements. You sigh knowing at this rate that he’s going to starve himself just to be stubborn. You go to the kitchen and dish out a plate for him before heading for the stairs. Jean casts you a worried glance.

“I’ll be back in a bit.” You say as you rush up the stairs. As you reach the top the night air caresses your skin in its coolness. You can see Captain Levi a few feet away sitting in a rickety wooden chair, gazing intently into the dark. He’d set up a small fire and you fear the crooked wooden table next to him might just catch flame. “Captain?” You try to get his attention. You take a step closer. “Captain?” You set the food down on the table. He’s refusing to look at you. “Levi.” You finally say and his eyes dart to you. He’s scowling and you take a deep breath trying to keep your temper from rising. He’s being ridiculous. “I brought you dinner. God forbid, humanity’s strongest dies of starvation.” You say sarcastically and he glares into the fire.

“Fuck off.” He growls. You’ve had enough of his bullshit. You grab his shoulder taking a step closer to confront him. He rises from his chair, shrugging you off. But he doesn’t stop there. His expression is unreadable in the dim light and he hastens towards you. You back away from him your heart beating quicker with each step back. Your back strikes the wall behind you and he looms before you. He leans into you trapping you between his body and the wall. His eyes are dark, his posture angry but there’s something hiding just beyond the tension in his jaw, in the furrow of his eyebrows. He seizes your chin in his calloused fingers and kisses you. His kiss is rough, desperate, and hungry and you feel your stomach tying itself into knots. He bites your lip demanding entrance and when you gasp, he takes advantage of it slipping his tongue into your mouth. You moan and the noise itself breaks you free of your clouded mind. You shove him before striking him hard across the face. He doesn’t react to your blow, he just stands there, fists clenched and eyes downcast.

“How dare you!” You yell and you’re shaking with anger now. “What the fuck do you think gives you the right? Did you think just because Jean had a pass at me that you’d give it a go? I’m not some cheap whore, Captain.” When he doesn’t respond you continue. “I don’t know what the hell you want from me Captain, but this is a fucked-up way to treat someone who’s been nothing but kind to you.” You’re crying now. You can’t help it. You’re angry and confused. Why did he think it was okay to treat you this way? Most of all, you were angry at the small part of yourself that had allowed it to happen. That had wanted it. 

“I know it is.” He says and finally looks you in the eye. 

“Just what is it you want?” You shout and there’s desperation in your voice. You want answers. You want to know why you’re the only one who he’s let his guard down with. Why his eyes tend to wander to you during drills. Why he’d wanted you to stay with him while he was at his most vulnerable. Why he'd just kissed you.

His expression softens slightly and he bites his lip. “Y/n…” He doesn’t get to finish his sentence. His eyes widen and he’s running toward you. The air seems to be moving around you and you yelp as you feel crushing pressure around your torso and legs. You look behind you and see the ghastly grey face of one of the titans you’d spotted earlier that day. You scream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof! That cliff hanger. Sorry but not sorry xD I had to. I PROMISE I'll be updating tomorrow though so you won't have to wait long!


	18. Chapter 18

Your heart is constricting in your chest as the distance between yourself and the aberrant titan’s gaping mouth slowly wanes. Its breath is putrid: a mixture of blood and decaying flesh. Its eyes are luminous in the dark and it strikes fear into your very core. You can see it again. Rhys being lowered into the jaws of the grey-haired titan on that day and tears spill down your cheeks as you realize you’re awful close to sharing the same fate. 

You struggle despite knowing the futility of it. There’s nothing you can do. You’d left your 3D gear inside the outpost during your cleaning duties. You hear wires reeling in the dark and your eyes dart to the sound. You had forgotten momentarily that you weren’t alone in this struggle. Levi speeds towards you and the titan, his blades glinting dangerously in the moonlight. You can tell he’s having trouble seeing properly though as he shoots off his gear and he plummets briefly missing his mark before readjusting, the hooks digging into the meaty flesh of the titan’s forearm. 

“Y/n!” He yells and you can see the fear in his eyes as he lands on the titan’s arm, blades wheeling to cut you free of its fingers. Three fingers sever falling into the dark below and you slip from its grasp. You watch the Captain as you fall, his gaze never leaving you. Your eyes widen as the titan strikes its head forward, teeth ready to engulf him. Levi just barely dodges the attack and your breath catches in relief. You can no longer see him in the dark but you can hear the titan screaming. The sound sends goose pimples flooding up your arms or maybe that’s the cold air enveloping you as you plummet towards the ground.

You strike the side of the outpost roof; you can’t breathe and you hear your ankle snap before you feel the sharp pain shoot up your leg. You try to curl in on yourself knowing it’s a long way to the ground and that even though you’d been freed from the prospect of being eaten, the ground could very well flatten you. Your shoulder connects with another segment of roof and you yelp. You close your eyes as the ground looms closer. Despite the frightening prospect of death, you hope Levi is okay. You know he’s more than capable but there was a reason that you’d never engaged a titan in the dark. You try to take in a breath bracing yourself for the bone crushing blow of the ground. Instead you feel warmth embrace you and your trajectory is no longer down but sideways. You open your eyes; Levi had caught you and is trying to carry you to safety. The wind whips his hair out of his eyes and you can see the blood spilling down the side of his face. Above you, the titan begins to fall. Limbs rain down around you curling with tendrils of steam. You can just make out the roof of the stables and you both almost make it. 

“Shit.” You hear the Captain curse as the titan’s scalding arm catches his leg in its fall. You spiral violently and he shoves you towards the stable’s roof. You collide with the thatch your breath flooding from your lungs as you watch the wires of his gear falter. He tumbles sideways, slate eyes staring at you as he plummets the rest of the way to the ground.

“Levi!” You cry into the dark.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are my amazing readers, the rest of this scene. Hope you enjoy!

“Levi!” You call out to him in the dark but he doesn’t answer. You try to rise to your feet only to be met with extraordinary pain as your ankle keels under your weight. You hiss in pain before beginning to crawl towards the edge. You use the loose thatch and your good leg to propel you forward. Your eyes can’t make out anything clearly in the dark but you swear you can see a dark figure laying on the ground below. You hear 3D maneuver gear above you and Jean, Eren, and Sasha lower themselves onto the stable roof beside you.

“Y/n!” Jean yells and both him and Sasha rush toward you. Eren hesitates and you wonder just how much of a mess you look. 

“Jean.” You say. “The Captain. Below.” Your lungs struggle to provide you with the breath for words. 

“Eren, go and check on the Captain.” Jean says as he and Sasha support your weight and get you on your feet. You wince but remain standing.

“He’s alive!” You hear Eren yell and you’re flooded with relief. Thank god. 

*****************************************************************************

You sit in one of the rickety chairs next to the Captain’s bed. It was now early morning, the sun tinging the room orange as you stare at his unconscious figure. 

Once your squad had found you both, they’d brought you inside and tended to your wounds as best they could. Sure enough, you’d broken your ankle. You also had bruised ribs and a mild concussion. Sasha had wrapped up your ankle and chest and you had insisted on staying with the Captain. 

Eren and Armin had taken care of Levi. He seemed fine except for a multitude of bruises, a gash across his forehead, and the awkward angle his leg was in though Armin had assured you that it wasn’t broken. You stare at his face wishing he’d open his eyes. Wishing you could see his lips twist into a smirk or even his jaw rigid with anger. Anything but this dreadful waiting. 

You sigh as the door swings open and Sasha sidles in balancing a tray of tea and food. A slice of bread disappears between her lips as she places the tray down next to you. 

“Y/n, you need to eat.” She says and you look at the food. Your stomach clenches uncomfortably and you shake your head.

“I’m not hungry.” You say but you do pick up the tea. It’s warm in your hands. 

Sasha rolls her eyes but doesn’t press you. She eyes Captain Levi. “You know he almost looks normal like this.” She says and you chuckle softly. “Almost handsome even.” You look up at Sasha and she laughs.

“Careful, Sasha. You wouldn’t want Connie to hear you.” You mutter and she blushes. Your eyes stray back to Levi and Sasha gives you a gentle squeeze on your shoulder.

“He’ll wake up soon.” She says. 

You nod. “I know.” You look back up at her and she’s smiling again. “What?”

She shakes her head. “Nothing, I’m just glad you aren’t lying to yourself anymore.” You take a sip of your tea not entirely sure her words are the truth. You still didn’t know what you meant to him, or if you were even prepared to sort through your own feelings. You take another sip and she pats you gently on the back. 

“Let me know when he’s awake.” She says. “Jean’s readying the horses so we can depart once the Captain is ready.” She shrugs when you raise an eyebrow. “It makes the most sense. You and the Captain took out one of the aberrant titans we were looking for, but both of your injuries need to be taken care of by someone who knows what they’re doing. The rest of us would be worthless trying to complete this mission on our own.” 

Jean’s plan does makes sense but the thought of having to ride horseback with your ankle makes you cringe. Sasha casts you one more encouraging glance before she disappears from the room. You set your tea down on the side table and brush a stray hair out of the Captain's face. You’re startled when he grabs your wrist, and his eyes slowly flutter open. 

“Y/n.” He breathes, his expression is pained but there’s relief in his eyes. He pulls you forward, his arms wrapping around you in a gentle embrace. “You’re alive.” He whispers and his breath is hot against your cheek. You wince, pain shooting across your ribs, and he let’s go. The worry that had been evident moments ago is replaced by unease. “Y/n…”

“Save your strength, Captain.” You say struggling to your feet. “We have a lot to talk about when we return, but for now I’m going to let Sasha know you’re awake. We need to get back.”

He nods and you limp out of the room trying your best not yelp at each fresh stab of pain. 

*******************************************************************************

Once Sasha had been alerted, you all had quickly packed your remaining belongings and hurried to the horses. Eren and Jean had helped Captain Levi mount Connie’s horse and he seemed rather disgruntled to be having to ride behind Connie. He threw the occasional glare at Jean but he didn’t say a word and you sighed. You would definitely have to explain later. 

Mikasa and Armin had helped you onto Sasha’s horse and you grip her waist tightly. The Captain’s eyes linger on you and you take a deep breath before looking to Jean.

“Let’s go.” You say and Jean nods before kicking his horse into a gallop.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do we think about this chapter? Hopefully, I did you all a little justice. I know that I'm looking forward to them returning to the barracks and sorting their feelings <3


	20. Chapter 20

It had been two weeks since you’d returned from your mission. You’d been barred from seeing the Captain by Commander Erwin. He’d said both of you needed time to heal and it was beyond irritating. You wanted to see how the Captain was doing, and more than anything you wanted to talk to him. 

Frankly, if not for Sasha’s visits and the occasional visits from other members of your squad, you were sure you’d go insane. You’d been confined to your bed mostly; your ankle was stiff and still hurt when you put weight on it but it was healing slowly. 

“Sasha, are you sure we can’t try and go for a walk or something?” You ask her. She’s stopped in for one of her visits again and she rolls her eyes at you as she washes your dinner plate in the bathroom sink. 

“You know, you aren’t allowed to go anywhere.” She says and blanches. “Besides I don’t really feel like enduring the Captain’s wrath if he were to find out I’d taken you outside when you were still injured.”

You lift an eyebrow. “You’ve spoken with Captain Levi?” You ask hopeful. 

She shakes her head. “No, I spoke with Squad Leader Hange though and apparently he’s just as restless as you. Apparently, he’s moodier than usual.” She giggles.

“What?” You ask.

“Nothing. Hange just has a messed-up sense of humor. Apparently, she told him that Commander Erwin was considering sending you to his quarters to be a live-in nurse for him.” She snorts. “Y/n, he threw his tea at her.”

“She sure knows how to get under people’s skin.” You say and laugh. You can just imagine the Captain’s irritated expression. His clenched jaw, dark eyes narrowed, but it was even more hilarious given the fact that you knew, just like you, he’d probably been confined to his bed. It turned out that Armin had been right in his examination of his injuries. He hadn’t broken anything though he’d strained the muscles in his leg. 

You frown and Sasha comes and sits at the edge of the bed. “Hey, cheer up. You should be able to be on your feet in a few more weeks.”

You groan. “A few more weeks is two weeks too many. I’m going crazy in here. I mean look around me Sasha, I’m basically living in my own filth.” It was true. Since you couldn’t really move around, you had clothes littered across the floor and you hadn’t been able to keep up with even the bare minimum of sweeping or dusting. Sasha had been kind enough to try and sort through and wash your clothes, but after she’d returned with someone else’s clothes entirely, you’d told her not to worry about it. You grit your teeth. If Levi saw your room, he might have a heart attack.

You sigh running a hand through your tangled h/c hair. 

“Someone’s lovesick.” Sasha mutters and you glare at her.

“What was that?” You ask.

“Oh nothing.” She says with a laugh. “Come on, y/n. You’re getting better, you really need to brighten up.”

“Speaking of lovesick,” You start letting her know that you’d heard her. “How did your date go with Connie?”

She bites her lip, her cheeks flushing red. “Well, we um kissed.” She says averting her eyes. 

“Sasha!” You say throwing her a smile and grabbing her by the shoulder. “That’s awesome! You are so adorable right now, by the way.” You tease and she turns an even brighter shade of red. 

“Shut up, y/n.” She says glaring at you. You laugh. “It wasn’t at all what I expected.” She admits. “It was really nice.” She’s being shy and your smile evolves into a smirk.

“Sasha, is Connie your first kiss?” You ask her and she runs her fingers through her high ponytail. 

“Maybe.” She says. “So, what if he is? I did come from a small village in the woods, y/n. And unlike some of the other girls, I was actually trying to learn how to not die when we started our training.” She fixes you with a glare. “Besides, just because you’ve kissed lots of guys-”

You throw up your hands in defense. “Whoa, slow down there, Sasha. I don’t know what you’ve heard but I’m not just going around kissing everyone.”

She raises an eyebrow. “Okay, well fine. Ten guys.”

“Ten?” You yelp. “Dear god, Sasha do you really think that poorly of me.”

“How many then?” She asks haughtily.

You roll your eyes before counting off on your fingers. “Well there was Hans, my childhood crush. Anton on a drunken dare. Jean.” 

Sasha throws you a withering look. “Y/n, please tell me you’re joking.”

You rub the back of your neck. “Yeah, it may have not been the best call, but we were out beyond the wall and well it didn’t really mean anything. He knows that.” 

“You better hope he does, y/n.” She says sighing. “Anyone else?” 

You blush looking anywhere but at her. “Levi.”

“What?!” She asks. She grabs you by the shoulders forcing you to look at her. “When? Why didn’t you tell me that sooner!”

You sigh. “It was before the titan attacked and well, it’s complicated.” You stare at your hands.

“Here I am telling you about my first kiss, and you’ve kissed two of our squad members. Who’s next Eren?” Her tone is dripping with sarcasm.

“That’s not funny, Sasha.” You say. “Besides, I think Mikasa would kill me in my sleep.”

She snorts finally calming down a little. “Sorry.” She says running her fingers through her hair again. “No wonder you’re going insane being cooped up here.” 

There’s a knock at the door and Sasha stands kicking your clothes under your bed. “Come in.” She calls. The door opens, it’s Jean. 

“Um, hi, y/n.” He says awkwardly. “Sasha.” 

Sasha waves before going to retrieve your dishes. “I was just leaving.” She says and before she bolts out the door, she throws you a look. “You better talk to him, y/n.” She whispers before waving goodbye. You look at Jean who’s taking in the dire state of your room. 

“Hey Jean.” You say.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, okay, I know it's probably not at all what you expected but I promise Levi is very miffed with this situation too! Reader will be with our beloved Captain soon <3 Still though, let me know your thoughts ;D


	21. Chapter 21

Jean walks to the window and you follow his gaze as his fingers graze the dusty sill. “It’s filthy in here.” He says.

“Thank you.” You say with a roll of your eyes. “It’s not exactly like I can just get up and dust. Trust me I’ve tried and it didn’t end well.” You say. Jean laughs but it doesn’t reach his eyes. He’s staring at your ankle.

“How are you feeling?” He asks.

“Better.” You say. “Sasha was just enlightening me that I still have a few more weeks before I can get out of this god-awful bed.”

He rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah, I’ve been meaning to apologize.” 

You raise an eyebrow. “For what?”

He stares at his boots. “I’m an idiot, y/n. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”

“Oh. That.” You say.

“I don’t know what I was thinking. I just lost it. You’ve been giving all your attention to the Captain and we were beyond the wall. I don’t know something just sort of snapped inside my brain.”

“I haven’t been giving all of my attention to the Captain.” You try to defend yourself knowing your blushing.

He sighs. “It doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t have done it.” His fawn eyes meet your e/c ones. “I know that kiss you gave me was out of pity but you really shouldn’t have. It’s what caused you to be on the shit end of the Captain’s temper and it’s what put you on the roof when that aberrant attacked.”

You want to tell him that your kiss wasn’t out of pity but you aren’t sure how to explain it to him, so you leave it. Instead you focus on his guilt. “Jean. You’re not at fault here. I am. I chose to go after Captain Levi, and frankly I’d do it again.”

“Even if that would mean you’d be here miserable in bed again?” He asks.

You nod. “Most definitely. We all made it out of there alive. That’s what’s most important. If I hadn’t gone to the battlements to give that idiot his dinner, he might be dead. We might all be.” You shiver at the thought. You can see Levi’s dark form on the ground again and you close your eyes to the image.

“Fuck it. I told Eren I wouldn’t help, but you deserve better than this dank emotional hole in the wall.” He says.

You glare at him. “Why thank you, Jean.”

He rolls his eyes before leaving abruptly. He leaves the door ajar and you’re left staring into the empty hall. “What the hell?” 

Moments later he returns Eren and Armin in tow. 

“What the hell is going on?” You ask as Armin starts shoving random clothes into a bag. 

Jean and Eren smile down at you. “We’re busting you out of here.” Jean says.

“Captain’s orders.” Eren says. You laugh and for the first time in two weeks you’re genuinely happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed this chapter! We're finally heading for the fluff! Prepare yourselves <3


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are! Finally back with the Captain :)

When they’d told you they were busting you out on the Captain’s orders, you hadn’t expected for them to literally bring you to the Captain’s office. Eren and Jean had nearly carried you and as they deposit you on the green couch, they bump the table rattling the tea canisters.

“Oi, watch it.” Captain Levi says as he limps into the room and he is a sight for your sore eyes. You marvel at the fact that he’s even walking and you note the brace running from his knee to his ankle. Aside from the brace and the thin scab at his forehead, he looks normal. He shoots Eren and Jean a scathing look and they stiffen.

“Sorry, Captain.” Eren says. Levi tuts before looking at Armin. “You can leave her clothes by the fireplace.” 

Armin does as he asks and all of you are staring at him now. 

He glares at them. “This isn’t a social gathering. You followed your orders, now get out.” 

The boys scurry out waving over their shoulders at you as they close the door behind them. Jean casts you one last worried look and you're sure he's second guessing himself.

Levi sighs running a hand through his hair.

“You could have at least said thank you.” You say as way of greeting and he ignores you moving to inspect the bag that Armin had brought. Your face goes instantly red as he starts rifling through your clothes a look of disgust on his face. “Hey!” You yell as he tosses most of them into the fire. 

“There’s no way in hell I’m letting you wear something that filthy.” He says grabbing a pair of your pants that he apparently had deemed suitable before tossing the rest in the fire. You groan and he walks toward you. His limp is just barely noticeable and you wonder how in the hell he keeps a straight face knowing just how much pain your own injury is causing you. He grabs you by the chin, tilting your head right then left. He frowns. “You’re worse than I thought.” He says wrinkling his nose. He grabs you by the arm, lifting you up in one smooth movement and throwing your arm over his shoulder. “You’re taking a shower. Now.” He says and your face turns a new shade of red.

“Levi-“ You start to protest. 

“There is no way you are staying here in your current state, brat.” He says. “Don’t even bother arguing.” He removes your arm from his shoulder as you reach the bathroom. He makes sure you’re propped up against the wall before disappearing to his room. He reappears moments later with one of his clean shirts and your sole pair of pants. “This should fit.” He says. “There are clean towels in the cabinet here.” He taps the cabinet next to the sink. His eyes linger on you a moment before he looks away and you realize that despite his nonchalance, this is awkward for him too. “Do you need help getting in?” He asks and you shove him. 

“Get out, Captain.” You yelp. He obliges casting one last glance at you over his shoulder. 

“I’ll be in the hall if you need me.” He says closing the door. You bite your lip and look in the mirror. Your face is red but despite that Levi’s right, you look like hell. You sigh letting your hair out of its tangled ponytail cursing when your hair band gets caught in your hair. 

“You okay?” You hear his voice from the hall and you feel your heartbeat quicken. You hadn’t expected him to literally be waiting in the hall. 

“Fine.” You call wrenching the god forsaken thing free. You take a deep breath trying to calm yourself down. The fact that he’s so close is making you nervous and you decide the best course of action is getting in the shower first. You struggle to lift your leg into the shower but you manage. Once inside you pull the curtain and start unbandaging it. It peels away easily and you sigh, stroking the green and blue bruises around your ankle. You drop the bandages outside the shower and begin to peel off your clothes. You grit your teeth and turn on the shower. You take a tentative step into the water and you’re greatly relieved that it’s warm. You sigh letting your muscles relax. It’s been too long since you’d been able to truly get clean and you scrub yourself till your skin glistens pink. You shampoo your hair and rinse it before turning off the shower. Its only then that you feel like kicking yourself. You should have gotten your towel first. 

Ringing out your hair, you limp to the cabinet holding the door closed with your free hand. You know you’re being silly and the likelihood of Levi peeping on you is nearly nonexistent but you can’t calm your frazzled nerves. 

Finding a towel, you dry yourself off before sliding your clothes on. Levi’s shirt is a little tight around your chest but it fits. You open the door and see him sitting on the floor in the hall his fingers tapping away on his thigh. Seeing you, he stands using the wall to help him to his feet. He’s staring and there’s a faint hint of something close to a smile on his lips. 

You blush awkwardly balancing yourself against the bathroom door. “Um, a little help?”

He shakes his head. “Of course.” He says helping you back to the couch. He’s quiet and you wish he’d say something as he walks to his desk. You stare into the fire and at the charred remains of your clothes. Levi takes a seat next to you on the couch and you notice he’s brought some medical supplies with him. He grabs your leg and puts it in his lap. 

“Captain!” You yelp as he hikes your pant leg up baring your ankle. 

He arches an eyebrow fixing you with an annoyed look. “It won’t heal if we don’t rewrap it.” He says and before you can protest, he begins bandaging it. His fingers brush against your skin and you bite your lip keeping yourself from gasping at his touch. He ties the end of the bandage and pulls your pant leg back down. “There.” He says. “Now you’re going to sleep in my room and I’ll take the couch.” He explains. “Tomorrow, we’ll talk.” He lifts you from the couch and helps you to his room. You look at him but his expression is unreadable. You reach out and poke his cheek wondering if this is some weird dream. You can’t possibly be staying here. He frowns looking at you sideways. “What are you doing, brat?”

“Nothing.” You say as he helps you into bed. You watch him as he untucks the covers and pulls them over you. The last time you’d been here was when he’d been drunk, you think to yourself. He sighs before heading back towards the office. 

“Get some rest.” He says before shutting the door. You lay there shocked by everything that had transpired in the last hour. You were in the Captain’s bed again, except you were wearing his shirt this time, and you’d be staying here for you didn't even know how long. You sigh rolling over onto your side and pulling the covers up to your chin. Your heart is thumping away in your chest at the prospect of talking to him tomorrow. There’s nothing you can do to soothe your nerves and you suppose the only thing you can do is try to get some rest like he'd suggested. Yet when you close your eyes, you’re having trouble falling asleep and your mind drifts back to the night you’d slept there before. To his warm embrace and the soft rhythm of his breathing beside you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you all think??


	23. Chapter 23

You wake up to angry voices in the other room. They’re rather loud and you wonder just who has pissed the Captain off this early in the morning.

“Levi.” It seems its Commander Erwin. You ease out of bed, limping to the door and opening it a crack to get a better look at what’s going on. “You directly disobeyed my orders regarding y/n.” Commander Erwin says. His heavy eyebrows are furrowed and he’s throwing Levi his best glare. You bite your lip as you look at the Captain. He’s sitting at his desk; legs crossed awkwardly because of his brace and a look of pure boredom on his face. His hair is messy and he’s still wearing his clothes from the night before. 

Erwin groans at his lack of reaction. “Dear god, Levi. I did all this for your own good. I can’t have you holed up here with one of your squad mates, with some woman. Do you even realize how that makes you look to any of the other squad leaders? What it makes me look like to allow this to happen? You’re her superior Levi, you need to act like it.”

Levi straightens the pile of paperwork on his desk before sighing. “I don’t see what the problem is Erwin. You let Shitty Glasses have her titans and do her freak experiments, and here you are bitching at me over a girl. And as for the other squad leaders, when have I ever given a shit what they think of me?” 

“That’s not the same and you know it. “Erwin says. “Hange’s experiments are to further our understanding of the titans. This…” He motions towards the room. “…is distracting you from your work. You could have died out there on a simple mission to kill aberrant titans.”

Levi glares at the Commander his jaw twitching. “Fuck off, Erwin. Simple mission? Tell that to the hundreds that have died out there under your command and mine.” He was on his feet now and he hobbled over to the table to make himself some tea. “You let Hange have those disgusting beasts that have killed our comrades inside the walls and you really want to lecture me about my own safety and capability. Frankly, fuck you.”

“Levi.” The Commander warns.

“No. She’s staying here until her ankle is healed. I’ll still do your damned paperwork and do my duties as best I can. I won’t talk about this anymore, Erwin.” He levels him with a scathing look.

Commander Erwin stands his hands clenched into fists. “Levi, you’re putting me in a difficult position. One in which I may have to do something neither of us will like.” His expression softens. “I’m trying to do the right thing, Old Friend.”

Levi doesn’t look at him and the Commander sighs. He runs a hand through his hair before turning for the door. It’s only when he’s finally gone that the tension leaves Levi’s shoulders. 

“Oi, brat.” You hear him say and you stumble forward into the hall. “How long were you listening?”

“Not long.” You lie. He turns to face you setting his tea back down on the table. He eyes your rumpled appearance and comes to help you to the couch. 

“Don’t worry about what you heard.” He says. 

“But Captain…” You start.

“I said don’t worry about it.” He says a little too forcefully as he makes you a cup of tea and hands it to you.

You decide to drop it for the time being knowing you won’t get very far with how irritated he had seemed earlier. 

He walks to his desk, grabbing his jacket and shrugging it on before heading to the door. “Wait here. I’ll be back with some breakfast.” He says as he opens the door.

“Levi, wait.” You say and he looks back at you over his shoulder. “Thank you.” 

His eyes narrow briefly and he nods before stepping out into the hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you think? We're slowly getting to the good stuff, I promise. There's just a few bumps along the way <3


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you are my readers! Finally, THE talk lol. Hope you enjoy!

You both eat breakfast in silence. The Captain sits at his desk barely touching his food as he looks over reports and you wash your toast down with tea as you watch him. He’s fidgeting with his pen and he sets it down throwing you an exasperated look.

“Can you stop staring, brat?” He says and you blush. “It’s distracting.”

“Sorry.” You utter hiding your face behind your cup. You’re a ball of nerves this morning and it seems even Levi is a little on edge. 

He sighs pinching the bridge of his nose before coming to join you on the couch. “It’s fine. Besides I promised you we would talk today.”

Your ears go red. “Oh, right.” You say staring into your tea. You sit there in silence for a moment.

“You gone shy on me now, brat?” He asks flicking your temple and you turn to glare at him.

“Me? I’m not the one who has some serious explaining to do, Captain.” You growl and he smirks.

“There you are.” He says and you shove him.

“Shut up.” You say and you bite your lip trying to find the right words.

“I’m sorry.” He says and you look up to find him staring at his hands, his eyebrows furrowed. “I shouldn’t have kissed you like that and I shouldn’t have gotten angry when I found you and Kirstein. It’s none of my business and I acted like an asshole.”

You sigh heavily. “You were being an asshole.” You say and he frowns. “But you have the wrong idea about Jean and I.” 

He raises an eyebrow as he stares at you. “I’m not an idiot, y/n. I saw you two...” He wrinkles his nose in distaste. 

You can’t help but laugh at his expression and he glares at you. “Sorry. Sorry.” You say. “It’s not what you think though. I was just, well, comforting him.” You realize you’re doing a really bad job of explaining as he stares at you seemingly confused and shocked. You groan running a hand through your hair. “We were beyond the wall. He kissed me, basically admitting his feelings for me and I let him down.”

“That’s a fucked up way of letting someone down.” He says and you put your face in your hands. 

“You don’t understand. I was just trying to make him feel better. We could have died out there. We almost did.” You look up at Levi and he sighs.

“I get it.” He says. “I don’t like it, but I get it. You were just trying to make him feel better. You knew that there was a possibility that he might not come back so you gave him what he wanted.” He leans back further staring at the ceiling. His jaw twitches slightly and your eyes widen. Is he jealous?

“I’ve explained my kiss, now explain yours, Captain.” You say and he looks at you sideways. You blush under his gaze but continue. “You never answered my question.”

He sighs, sliding across the couch so that his head now rests on your shoulder. “I don’t know.” He says. “I wish I had a better answer for you but I don’t.” He begins playing with a strand of your hair and it tickles when his fingers occasionally brush your neck. “All I know is that you’re important to me. That I can’t stop thinking about you.” He says his voice low. “Especially during drills and when you think I don’t realize you’re staring.” He chuckles bringing your hair to his lips. You try to keep yourself from squirming under those dark eyes though you’re sure the pounding of your heart has already given you away. He lets go of your hair and grabs your chin forcing you to look at him. He searches your face and places a tender kiss on your forehead. “I hope you don’t hate me for not being able to answer your question.” He says and though you’re upset that you haven’t gotten any closer to the truth, you don’t want this to end. You want him to keep touching you. You want to feel the warmth of his fingers on you. To feel his soft lips against your skin, but instead he sighs nestling himself back into the crook of your shoulder and you flush as he plays with the sleeve of your shirt. “I’m tired, y/n. Just let me stay like this a little longer. I promise you can leave tomorrow if that's what you want.” You watch him as his eyes flutter closed and his breathing evens. 

You sigh running your fingers through his hair. The sight of him so peaceful pulls at your heartstrings. “I don't hate you, Captain. I don't think I ever could.” You whisper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof! I know for me the feels are running high, but what do you all think? 
> 
> I just want to let you all know I struggled with this chapter, and I know Levi's answer isn't fair but hell if it was that easy, it wouldn't be worth it. Also I'm hoping to give you all some more fluff so reader x levi can discover what they are to each other together. 
> 
> Love you all for staying with me and reading ❤❤


	25. Chapter 25

You’d decided to stay. Though Levi was frustrating at best, you couldn’t just leave. After all, he’d stood up to the Commander for you to stay with him and not only that but you wanted a better answer than he’d given you and there was no way you’d get it stuck back in your room. His feelings aside, you wanted to sort out your own too, and what better way to do that than to be stuck in close quarters with him. 

“Captain, can you please stop that?” You say as he scrubs the windowsill for the third time. You’re trying to read the romance novel you’d stumbled upon weeks prior, and the sound of his obsessive cleaning is distracting you. 

He throws you a glare. “If it bothers you so much, go read in bed.” He says scrubbing at another crack in the sill. 

You groan. “Why do you insist on being the biggest pain in the ass?” 

He’s about to respond with what you can only assume is a snarky comment when a knock sounds from the door.

“Who the fuck could that be?” He asks walking towards his desk. You note that his limp is almost nonexistent now.

“Come in!” You call and he shoots you another glare.

The door opens and Hange spills into the room. She’s grinning ear to ear as she takes in the both of you.

“So, it is true.” She says. “The Captain has taken you as his prisoner.” 

You laugh as Levi throws a punch at her and she dodges it smoothly. 

“Levi, stop before you hurt yourself again.” You say to him and his jaw twitches. 

Hange slinks to your side, throwing an arm over your shoulder as she throws him a smirk. “Yeah, Levi.” She draws out his name. “We wouldn’t want poor y/n to worry about you, now would we?” 

“Tch.” He tuts before stalking to his desk where he unceremoniously plops into his desk chair arms crossed.

Hange finally looks at you. “So how are you doing, y/n?” She asks. “Is the Captain taking care of you?”

You roll your eyes but smile. “I’m feeling better.” You say. “I can put a little of my weight on my ankle now.” 

“Really?” She says eyebrows raised. Her expression changes to one of wonder. “Y/n, would you mind telling me about the aberrant titan?” There’s a terrifying glint in her eyes and your breath catches. “How big was it? I heard you and Captain Levi fought it in the dark? It’s so interesting that it was active after dusk.” She rambles. 

“Oi, Four Eyes.” He crosses the room, grabbing her roughly by the shoulder. “Shut your god damned mouth.” It’s only then that you realize you’re trembling and you clasp your hands trying to keep them from shaking. 

“It’s okay.” You say but Hange runs a hand through her hair with a sheepish grin.

“No, y/n, Levi’s right. It was stupid of me to even ask.” She says and she fixes Levi with a hurt look. “You can let go of me now. I won’t ask her anything else about the titans.” He let’s go of her reluctantly and you give him a small smile.

“I am glad you’re doing better though, y/n.” She says. “I’m sure Blouse and Kirstein will be glad to hear that this one doesn’t have you chained up in his bedroom.” She jabs a finger in Levi’s direction and you instantly turn red.

“Hange!” You yelp and Levi looks like he might kill her. 

“Shitty glasses, you’re really testing my patience.” He growls and she stares at him incredulously. 

“Levi Ackerman has patience now?” She asks mocking him. “Y/n, just what kind of spell do you have on our dear Captain?” 

“I’ve had enough of your bullshit.” Levi says grabbing her by the arm and dragging her to the door. She nearly trips but before he can shove her into the hall, she procures a letter from her jacket pocket.

“Wait Levi.” She whines. “This is for you. It’s from Commander Erwin.”

He snatches the letter from her before throwing her out. Only once the door is closed again does he sigh. He eyes the letter before sliding it into the stack on his desk. You swear the tips of his ears are red as he straightens the stack of papers. 

“Y/n?” He asks and you flinch at the sound of his voice. 

“Yes, Captain?” You ask.

He takes a deep breath before he sits and tugs on his boots. “I’m going out. Do you want anything?” He doesn’t look at you as he talks.

“Um, we need more tea.” You mutter and he nods. 

“I’ll grab some along with dinner on my way back.” He says rising and heading for the door. “Try to relax while I’m gone.”

“See you a little later, Captain.” You say as he leaves you to your book and your racing heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear god, I love Hange. She really knows how to make things awkward. So, what did you all think?


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had fun writing this one. Hope you enjoy :)

You’ve finally finished the next chapter in the book you’d been reading, it was a refreshing escape from your mounting boredom and from the nagging reality that soon you’d have to return to drills and your own quarters. 

Your ankle is healing well. Though you still can’t put your full weight on it, you can now hobble about the room on your own without having to lean on Levi. Which had been both a welcome relief, given how much time he spent away now that he was back to his normal duties, and a disappointment. You missed his closeness, the way his arm cradled your lower back, fingers brushing your hip as he helped you out of bed or to the couch. 

You close your book and fall back on the couch letting your h/c hair spill over the arm. You’re antsy. It’s been hours since Levi left to run drills with the rest of the squad and you can’t bring yourself to read another chapter. The main character and her love interest had finally gotten together and there were far too many steamy scenes for your already troubled mind to process. Every scene had your mind straying to Levi and the kiss he’d given you beyond the wall. It irritated you. 

Lately, he’d been distant. Dismissive even and it was starting to eat at you. You had hoped that staying with him things would have changed. That maybe he would show you more of the soft side he’d shown you the day you’d talked. Hell, lately you’d even take him being angry at you like the old days. You groan and chuck the book at the wall. “Damn you, Captain.” You growl frustrated with not only him but yourself. You felt useless. 

The door crashes open and you’re wrenched from your inner turmoil. Levi storms into the room and your surprised to see that his uniform is covered in mud. You can even see it spattered against the back of his hands and at the exposed skin above his collar.

“Damn that fucking prick.” He growls pulling off his boots with more force than is necessary. His lip curls as he glares at them before throwing them back out the door into the hall. His jacket is the next article to be disposed of, thrown over the back of his chair haphazardly. He unravels himself from his harness and is halfway through unbuttoning his shirt when you finally gain the courage to speak.

“Captain.” You say and he flinches realizing that you’re there. You rise from the couch grabbing one of the clean rags you had set out when you’d thought you might clean. You amble over to him and see that he’s breathing heavily. He’s livid. He’s glaring at his hands still half-raised to the buttons of his shirt. He looks up at you but his expression doesn’t soften. 

You give him a small smile. “You’re filthy.” You say and his eyes cut you like a knife. 

“Y/n, I don’t have time for your fucking bullshit.” He snarls and you roll your eyes taking his hand in yours. You begin to clean the mud from his fingers, the back of his hand and wrist. He doesn’t move or speak. You take his other hand and do the same. You look up at him. The angry glint in his eyes is still there but he no longer seems like he’s going to lash out at you. You dab at the mud below his jawline. 

“So, who is this fucking prick?” You ask and he takes a deep breath.

“Arlert.” He growls and your eyes widen. 

“Armin?” You ask and his jaw twitches. “What did he do?”

“He’s the reason I’m covered in this disgusting filth.” He motions to his clothes but doesn’t explain further. You stifle a chuckle at the thought of Armin purposefully getting the Captain dirty. That boy is too smart for his own good and you wonder what Levi had done to be deserving of such a cruel yet amusing turn of events. 

“That doesn’t seem like something Armin would do.” You say wiping the last of the dirt from his neck. “At least not without someone egging him on.”

“And that’s why the rest of the squad is running laps through dinner.” He growls pulling away from you and stalking to the bathroom. “As much as I’m loving this riveting conversation, I’m taking a shower. I need to get out of this…” He seems to be struggling with words to describe just how disgusted he is with his soiled attire before groaning and slamming the door shut behind him. 

You let yourself chuckle now that he’s out of earshot. You chuck the dirty rag into the laundry bin before shuffling to his room. In his anger, he’d forgotten to grab clean clothes. You grab him a shirt, pants, and blush as you tuck a clean pair of his boxers into the pile. You walk to the bathroom and stare at the door. You can hear the water already running and you bite your lip trying to decipher the best course of action. If you leave them in the hall, he’ll have to come out and get them. Your blush is creeping to your ears now at the thought and you turn around clutching his clothes to your chest.  
“Stop being an idiot, y/n.” You tell yourself. “Just slide them into the bathroom. You can do that without being completely indecent.” You take a deep breath before opening the door and nudging them into the room. You close the door loudly and you cross the room too quickly causing your ankle to twinge with pain. 

You decide to grab his boots from the hallway and you are halfway through oiling them when Levi steps out of the bathroom running a towel through his black hair. He seems a little more relaxed and you note the droplets of water at his jaw and that the top two buttons of his shirt are undone showing you the sharp planes of his collar bone. You swallow the lump forming in your throat and finish polishing his boots as he slides into his desk chair the towel draped over his shoulders casually. He begins looking over a report all signs of his earlier anger seeming to have dissipated. You set his boots down by the door worrying the inside of your cheek with your teeth. 

“Captain.” You say and he doesn’t lift his eyes. You sigh. “What do you think of going out for dinner?” You start. “I’m tired of basic rations. Plus, we could stop by the tea house while we’re out.” You add the last bit hoping it’ll be too enticing for him to say no.

His eyes flick to your face. “Fine.” 

“Okay, I’ll go get ready then.” You say trying to hide your excitement. It’s the first time you’d be going out in weeks, and you realize it’s the first time you’ll be going out with Levi as you sort through the clothes you're grateful Sasha had brought you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? Are you as excited as I am for reader to finally go out with Levi?


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved writing this chapter! Hope you enjoy <3

You’d taken way too long getting dressed deciding on a navy-blue button up Sasha had brought for you, you’d rolled up the sleeves to your elbows, and black pants that you tucked into your boots. You’d fussed with your hair before deciding to leave it down. Levi had been waiting patiently going over his never-ending pile of reports.

Now you walk through town, the setting sun is painting the sky aflame with vibrant pinks and oranges. It casts playful shadows across Levi’s figure and highlights the perfect angles of his face. You smile, you’re grateful to be out of his room and office and on your feet again. But you're even happier that he's with you. You pick up your pace testing the limits of your ankle and are surprised to find that it doesn’t hurt nearly as much as it did that morning. You try to skip ahead and it still doesn’t seem to be bothering you. You turn to face Levi, grinning but you find him staring after you a worried expression on his face. You frown, taking a step toward him.

“What’s wrong?” You ask and are met with a sharp pain through your calf as you take another step. You yelp trying to right yourself and Levi grabs your arms.

“Idiot, what do you think you’re doing?” He scowls at you and you grit your teeth before setting down your foot gingerly. “Do you really want to spend another week off your feet?” His eyes glint with anger. “Think before you act, brat.” He pulls you to his side and links your arm with his. “Just hold on to me. I can’t trust you not to fall to your death.”

You glare at him. “You’re not funny.” You say.

“Who said I was joking?” He says. 

You’re about to reply when a familiar voice yells your name.

“Y/n!” It’s Sasha and she comes barreling towards the two of you. Connie follows her wearing an endearing smile his hands in his pockets. Sasha grabs your free hand and is bouncing on her toes.

“You’re up! You’re walking!” She says and you laugh at her excitement.

“For the most part.” You say glancing at Levi. His expression is blank as he watches the two of you.

“Hey y/n.” Connie says with a grin putting an arm around Sasha. “Captain.” He looks to Levi briefly. He doesn't seem particularly happy to see Levi and you remember that he'd just had them run laps. “Didn’t expect to see you out and about.” 

“Yeah, we were just going to grab something to eat. I’m tired of eating boring rations from the mess hall.” You say and Sasha is bouncing again. 

“Y/n! You have to try this little curry place. It’s a short walk from the tea house and they have the best steamed vegetables!” She says.

Connie sighs. “Sash, why don’t we let them decide for themselves?” 

You smile at his adorable nickname for her. She pouts. “But Connie, they’ll miss out otherwise.” 

He pinches her cheek. “Not everyone is going to like what you like.” He says and she sighs.

“I guess you’re right.” She says and you’re surprised she caves so quickly. 

You can feel Levi fidgeting beside you. “As adorable as this is, we should really get going.” You say. “This one has paperwork to get back to.” 

Levi grumbles something under his breath and you elbow him. 

Sasha looks at the two of you and throws you a wide grin. “Come on, Connie.” She says. “Let’s go find some dessert.” She pulls him along winking at you as she passes. You stifle a chuckle. “See you later, y/n. Captain.” 

“Blouse and Springer? Didn’t expect those two idiots to be together.” Levi says as you watch them disappear around a corner. 

You shrug. “Yeah, they seem happy.” You look back at him and see that he’s staring at you. “What?” 

“Nothing.” He says. “Let’s go.” 

He pulls you along and when you walk past the tea house you’re genuinely confused. “Aren’t we going in?” You ask. 

“We have tea back in my office.” He says in way of an answer. “Now come on.” He pulls you into a little diner. It’s a cute place with yellow walls and daisies spewing from the mouths of blue vases on every table. You take a seat and Levi wrinkles his nose before discarding the vase on your table to another. He runs a finger along the tabletop and you smile when you realize he’s checking to see how clean it is. He looks incredibly out of place here. Dark and disgruntled against a backdrop of sunshine and daisies. He looks up from his fidgeting when a waitress appears from the back.

“Evening.” She greets you both. “You ready to order?”

“What was it Blouse was blabbering about?” He asks. “Curry something?”

“We have our curried rice with steamed vegetables.” The waitress chimes in but he ignores her.

“I think that’s what she was talking about.” You say looking up at her and its only then that you notice she’s staring at Levi. You frown.

“Anything else I can get you?” She asks and you roll your eyes at the fact that she’s blatantly ignoring you. Levi finally looks at her and she smiles. 

“Do you have any black tea?” He asks. 

Her smile falters briefly. “We don’t I’m afraid. We do have a ginger tea though.”

“That’s fine.” He says resting his head on his hand. She blushes and you try not to groan at her ogling. 

"Thanks.” You say. “That’ll be all.” 

She throws you a disdainful look before heading to the kitchen. 

Levi arches an eyebrow at you and you sigh, shifting in your chair uncomfortably. 

“Your leg bothering you, brat?” He asks and you shake your head. 

No, but dealing with a pining waitress just might, you think to yourself. She returns moments later setting down a cup of ginger tea for each of you. You glare after her as she saunters back to the kitchen glancing back at Levi. 

“Oi, brat. Did you hear me?” You turn your attention back to Levi.

“Hmm?” 

“Why do you look like you want to chase that waitress down and murder her?” He asks.

“What?” You ask grabbing your tea a little too firmly and flinging droplets of it across your knuckles. You bite your lip dabbing the hot liquid with a napkin. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He rolls his eyes but lets it slide.

“So why don’t you tell me about drills today?” You ask and his expression sours. You smirk. “Just how did they get the upper hand on you, Captain?”

“It seems they’re upset that they haven’t been able to see you.” He says tightly taking a sip of his tea. He stares at the cup lips pursed before taking another sip.

“What?” You ask.

“Yeager and Kirstein think I’m purposefully keeping you from them and I wonder who could have given them that impression.” His eyes narrow and you sigh.

“Hange.” You say and he wrinkles his nose at the mention of her name.

“Shitty glasses has a way of continuously being a pain in my ass. I should have taken her out years ago.” He admits and you stare at him eyebrows raised. He’s kidding, right? You search his face.

“Levi. You can’t just get rid of people that annoy you.” You say and when he sets his cup down you notice the smirk tugging at his lips.

“Tell that to the waitress you keep glaring at.” He says and you scowl though your cheeks are tinged pink.

As if on cue, she reappears serving you your curried rice. It smells amazing and you’re ready to dig in but she lingers at the table.

“Excuse my forwardness,” She begins and Levi looks at her dully. “You’re Captain Levi of the Survey Corps, aren’t you?”

He nods. “What of it?”

She flushes gripping her tray harder. “I just…everyone talks about how much of an amazing guy you are. You’re a war hero.” She says.

Levi frowns. “It’s hard to be a war hero, when the war for humanity is still happening.” He says a little too harshly. 

She worries her lip and you can see it. The fear in her eyes. You wonder just how much she knows about the titans, whether she’s a part of the Church of the Walls or if she has someone she loves in the Survey Corps. You sigh. “Thank you for the curry. Unfortunately, the Captain doesn’t have the best manners.” You kick him under the table with your good leg and he shoots you a withering look. Her expression softens and she looks at you as if reconsidering her previous judgement. She gives you a small smile.

“It’s fine. I suppose all the Corpsmen are a little rough around the edges.” She says her voice lilting ever so slightly. You try to hide your smirk from Levi who’s eyeing you as he drinks his tea. “Anyway, enjoy. Let me know if there’s anything else you need.” She turns back to the kitchen and you feel his boot connect with your knee.

“Hey, watch it you ass.” You say and he raises an eyebrow.

“And I’m the one with poor manners.” He mutters his smirk returning.

You choose to ignore him, digging into your curried rice. It’s spicy with a hint of smokiness and you smile as you spear a turnip. It’s delicious and you’ll have to thank Sasha for the suggestion later. You look up at Levi who’s shuffling the turnips to the side of his plate with a look of loathing. His expression is adorable and you can’t help but smile. You both finish your food in comfortable silence and your eyes whip to the door as a crack of thunder sounds.

“I didn’t realize it was going to rain.” You say.

Levi stands putting money on the table and you rise as well. “We should be heading back.” He says. You nod and start the slow walk back. Your ankle is still a little tender but you’re doing better with the slow pace. 

With another crack of thunder the sky opens and rain batters the two of you. “Shit.” You hear Levi say. He grabs your hand locking his fingers with yours and your eyes widen as he tries to pull you along. Water is soaking your hair making it stick to your neck and shoulders. His hand is warm in the cold rain but its short lived. He stops turning to you with an annoyed expression. “This won’t do. At this rate, we’ll both be soaked.” He sighs putting his arm around you and lifting you into his arms. 

“Levi!” You yelp as your feet leave the ground. 

“Just put your arms around my neck.” He says and you glare up at him. His slate eyes are unreadable but you don’t protest as you see his hair sticking to his forehead in dark strings. You do as he asks, flushing red as you bring your head to his chest. He carries you the whole way back to his office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? I'm in love with their little dinner "date" xD


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I apologize in advance for this chapter. Regardless, I hope you keep reading and know that everything happens for a reason.

You reach his office, both of your clothes soaked and clinging to you. Levi awkwardly sets you down in front of the fireplace before starting a fire. It catches quickly and you’re grateful for the warmth. 

“Boots.” He says and you look at him confused. You notice him taking off his own and it finally registers. You slip yours off and he takes them from you walking to the door. You wrap your arms around yourself and edge toward the fire trying to get warm. Levi returns and hands you a towel which you immediately ruffle through your hair before wiping down your arms and patting at your wet clothes. You’re sure you look like a mess. Levi finishes toweling himself off and starts using it to mop the water off the floor around you. He sighs before looking back at you and frowning. “You’re shivering.” He says.

You rub your arms. “Am I? I haven’t noticed.” You joke and he shakes his head clearly exasperated by your antics. He grasps your forearm pulling you so you’re nearly in his lap.

“Levi, what are you doing?” You ask as he settles around you. Your back is against his chest and he wraps his arms around you before tucking his head onto your shoulder. He stares into the fire.

“Shut up and just enjoy the fire.” He breathes and your poor little heart can’t take it as he starts to trace patterns across your bare arms with his fingers trying to warm you. His arms around you are strong and comfortable and you blush as you realize that his body is warming you more than the fire. You take a steadying breath and turn to look at him. He’s staring and you can’t help but get lost in his dark eyes. 

You turn to face him reaching out to wipe a stray hair out of his eyes. Your heart shattering at just how imperfectly perfect he is. Despite his lack of expression, his eyes give him away. They hint at his feelings and reactions to the world around him. As you brush his cheek and he flinches, you can see a fire kindling there and you want to light the match. You trace your fingers along the curve of his jaw and he leans into your touch, his eyes never leaving yours. 

“Levi.” You say though you have no other words. His name falls off your tongue and the fire in his eyes burns brighter. You grab his collar with your free hand, taking a sobering breath, before you kiss him. It’s everything you’d hoped it would be. Like the kiss beyond the wall but better. This kiss is gentler, needier, and you can’t get enough of it. Levi’s hands wander to the small of your back and you squirm as his fingers graze the bare skin at the hem of your shirt. He pulls you closer, into his lap. Your mind is swimming filling you with need. You need him. His warmth. His hands on you. His kisses.

His mouth explores the tender skin of your neck. Once. Twice. But then he stops. His breathing ragged and warm against your skin before he pushes you away. He stands walking towards his desk and your eyes follow him. Anger and hurt well in your chest. 

“I can’t do this y/n.” He says. “I can’t put everything in jeopardy.”

Tears prick your eyes as you clench your hands in your lap. You stand up walking toward him. You grab his hand but he wrenches it free of your grasp.

“You can’t just take everything that just happened back, Levi.” You say your voice cracking. “I don’t believe for a second that you mean the words coming out of your mouth.” You’re angry now. Livid even. “Look at me, damn it.” The tears have started falling and he does just as you ask. His jaw is clenched. Eyes caught somewhere between regret and concern. “Tell me you don’t feel the same way I do.” You say and his jaw is working. He’s trying to control his expression. Trying to keep you out. 

“I’m sorry y/n.” He says brushing past you. “Tomorrow evening you’ll be returning to your own quarters.” You glare at his back grabbing the closest possible thing, a teacup, and chucking at him. You miss and your anger fizzes out completely as it crashes to the ground. It’s replaced by the weight of your sorrow and you turn bolting for his room. Slamming the door closed, you sink to the ground and let your sobs take over you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leave me a comment as to what you think and any predictions you might have. I love you guys <3


	29. Chapter 29

The next morning Levi is gone before you wake up. You pace his office your stomach in knots and your anger rising with each ticking minute. Your ankle hurts but you don’t care. You’re pissed. He has the audacity to kiss you and make you believe that there’s something between you and then he rejects you. You can’t wrap your head around it. It doesn’t make any sense. 

You groan. In all the time you’d known him he’d never been cruel. Harsh, irritating, and downright insufferable, sure. But never cruel. You sink into his desk chair rubbing your temples trying to find something that might explain everything. Your eyes wander to his stack of reports and it hits you. The letter from Commander Erwin. You dig through the reports, any decency you’d had for his privacy gone. 

You search for anything with your name. And it isn't until you get halfway through the stack that you see it.

Y/n. Written in Erwin’s eloquent script. You stare at it taking a deep breath as you read.

_Levi. I warned you I would have to do something neither of us liked. As of next week, Y/n will be transferred to the 4th Squad of the Survey Corps and will report to Squad Leader Hange Zoe. You’ve proven to me that you aren’t taking my warning seriously. Having y/n on your squad puts all of its members at risk especially Eren and yourself. How can I have two of our strongest assets in the war for humanity put into the hands of a simple albeit charming woman? I can’t._

_When I took you into the Survey Corps you pledged to take up this fight and now, I see you going back on that promise. Your mind is muddled my friend. You’re not as quick and focused as you were. You lost your squad during the female titan attack; do you really wish to lose another friend? Another comrade because you’ve chosen her?_

You grind your teeth your anger roiling to a boil.

_You’re playing with the lives of your squad mates and I won’t stand for it any longer. She will be a part of Hange’s squad. Do not retaliate and do not try to interfere. If you do, I will discharge her from the Survey Corps completely. I hope you understand what that will mean for her. Leave it be._

_Your Commander and Friend, Erwin Smith._

You slam your fist on the desk as you finish reading. “That fucking bastard.” You growl. “Who does he think he is to just play with my life like this?” Your jaw twitches as you reread the words “leave it be”. So, Levi had decided to just go along with him and not say a word to you. “The fucking coward.” You say and you pace the room before plopping back into his chair. You stare at the door your anger festering. You lean back propping your feet onto his desk and sending the reports fluttering to the floor. You try to get as comfortable as you can in your pissed off state, ready for the long wait until you can give Levi a piece of your mind.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm in love with these last few chapters. I'm sorry they are so short but I feel like its necessary for how much emotion is packed into each one. Hope you enjoy <3

The door creaks open and Levi raises an eyebrow at your position at his desk. “Y/n, just what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” He says and something snaps inside you.

“Me?” You say rising to your feet clutching the letter in your hand. “What about you, you fucking coward?” You throw the letter at him and he watches it as it sails to the floor. “Here I thought, I was the one who had done something wrong. That somehow, I was the one making something out of nothing. But here I find out that, no. I’m the only fucking sane person here.” 

His eyes follow you as you pace crushing his reports under your bare feet.

“How dare you make this decision for me.” You growl. “How dare both of you.” 

“Y/n…”

You cut him off. “No. You don’t get to say anything. You get to shut the fuck up and listen, Captain, because this simple albeit charming woman has things to say.” 

He clenches his jaw but doesn’t say anything further.

“Good. You fucking liar, were you just going to let me go back to my quarters and not tell me a god damn thing? You’re just going to let Erwin move me like some pawn on his fucking chessboard and not do anything about it? Not say anything to me? Do I mean that little to you?”

“Of course not. I-“ He starts and finally he comes to life before your eyes. The tragic expression of his frown. The hurt and furious depths of his eyes. It makes you want to cry but you can’t. Not yet. 

“Levi. I am going to ask you one more time. You have one more chance to tell me the truth. If not, I am walking out that door and you will never see me again.” You say. “What am I to you?”

He takes a step toward you his eyes searching your face. Taking in every angle, the contour of your lips, the shade of your eyes. “Everything.” He says.

“Then take me to Commander Erwin. Now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Omg! Reader is livid and I adored writing this emotional whirlwind. What did you guys think?


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you are my amazing readers! I hope you enjoy <3

You turn down the hall towards Commander Erwin’s office, Levi shadowing you and thankfully he hasn’t said a word since you’d both left his office. If he spoke to you, you might lose your nerve. You might just collapse into a crashing wave of emotions. So, you were grateful he granted you with his silence, giving you the strength to do this. 

You push past another squad leader who curses at you and Levi, but you ignore them. You reach the door of the Commander's office and throw it open.

Erwin is sitting at his desk engrossed in conversation with Hange. Both look up as you enter. Erwin frowns tenting his hands and Hange raises her eyebrows, eyes wide.

“Private L/n, what is the meaning of this rude interruption?” He asks. His eyes dart to Levi. “Levi?”

You can feel your anger twist into something ugly inside you. This man. This man is the one who thought he could play with your life. Your livelihood. Your love life. You stalk forward putting your hands on his desk and leaning closer so your e/c eyes are level with his piercing blue ones. 

“Rude? What happened to simple albeit charming?” You scoff. His eyebrows furrow and you get the feeling he wants to look to Levi but he remains expressionless. He frowns slightly.

“L/n…” He starts.

“Shut up and listen to me, Eyebrows.” You say baring your teeth at the man who would ruin you for the sake of his war. “You may think you can take everything away from me. Away from Levi and not bear any consequences, but you’re wrong. You think you’re some high and mighty Commander, fighting the war for humanity. Well you’re not. You’re no better than Keith Shadis." Your voice is thick with venom now. "Actually, Shadis is better than you. At least he had the courage to admit his flaws and failures. But you.” 

Hange grabs your arm and you shake her leveling her with a glare. “Wait your turn Shitty glasses.” You say adopting Levi’s nickname for her. 

You turn back to Erwin, his expression filled with the same nonchalant stoicism. “You are a no-good piece of shit. You say you fight for humanity but do you even know what humanity is anymore? It’s comradery, the little moments between friends. It’s love. That’s what your Survey Corps is supposed to be fighting for. The chance to keep those precious things safe. That’s what Rhys fought for. Anton. Byron. Petra. Oluo. Eld. Gunther. Myself. Levi. So many good, loving, loyal soldiers. And you just act like we’re tools.”

Your fingers curl into the wood of his desk. “You claim that Levi is playing with the lives of his squad by having feelings for me. Fuck you. You’re playing with the lives of every damn squad leader, private, and recruit under your command. And to even try to claim that you are any sort of caring friend to do any of this shit. You make me sick. Friends don’t manipulate the ones they care about.” 

You finally turn to Hange who’s staring at you with a deep frown on her lips. “And you.” You say. “You just accepted me as part of your squad knowing how much it would hurt me? Hurt Levi? I really thought you cared about him. Clearly I was wrong.”

“Private l/n.” Erwin says and your eyes dart back to him. “Are you done?” You glare at him and he sighs before looking at Levi. “You’re right to be angry.” You’re surprised to hear the words leave his lips. “But that doesn’t change my decision. I told you not to interfere. To just do this quietly so that you both might be able to live some semblance of happiness.” He levels you with his blue eyes and you can see just how tired he is. “Do you know what it’s like to have a lover in the Survey Corps? What it’s like to see their bloody corpse hang from the mouth of a titan? You both have experienced the loss of your squads but can you imagine that same feeling for someone you love with your full being? To never be able to feel that person’s touch again. To lose the ability to remember their voice. To never be held by them again?” Your heart constricts in your chest at his words. “I do, l/n.”

Hange sighs beside you. “Rose.” She says and you raise an eyebrow. 

Erwin nods. “Private Rose Bartley of the 87th graduating class of the Training Corps.” He looks down at his hands. “I wasn’t able to save her and I’ve lived with that guilt for the last sixteen years.”

Levi fidgets behind you and it occurs to you that Erwin has never shared this information with him. 

“So again, I will say, that my decision stands. For this outburst, Private Y/n L/n, you are hereby stripped of your rank and discharged from the Survey Corps.” He says. All your anger dissipates at his words making you feel hollow. You’d thought maybe you would change his mind. If anything, you thought your little speech would at least have him reconsider his stupid manipulative actions.

Levi steps forward taking your hand in his. He glares at Commander Erwin his jaw rigid. “Then you’ll have to strip me of my position as Captain as well.” He says and you stare at him wide eyed. This isn’t what you want. The Survey Corps is everything to Levi. 

“Levi-“ You start but he shakes his head and you remain quiet. 

“Y/n is right. I know you are trying to do what you think is right, but your own failed relationship has skewed your perception of the world around you, brother.” He says and Erwin unfolds his hands, eyebrows raised. “Love and life are precious and I won’t live a life of solitary in your Survey Corps. I won’t fight without her by my side. I won’t be Eren’s warden without her.” 

You frown at his words.

“Without me…without her…you won’t be able to seek out the truth that I know you so desperately are grasping for. You won’t be able to keep the Military police from confiscating Eren. Is that another life you want bloodying your hands, Erwin?” 

Erwin stares at Levi for a long moment. "You're bluffing Levi." He says.

"And if I'm not?" Levi says eyes narrowing. "What will you do then?"

Erwin sighs. “And here I thought I was the only one capable of playing this twisted game.” He leans back in his chair resting his hands in his lap. “I’ve underestimated you, Levi.” He looks at you. “Both of you. Y/n can stay on your squad but only as long as your squad mates feel it isn’t putting them at risk. They will report to me after every mission and if anything is amiss…” He trails off running a hand through his hair. “Well I suppose I’ll figure it out when that time comes.”

Levi doesn’t seem completely satisfied by his answer but you give his hand a gentle squeeze. You suppose it’s the best you could ask for given that just a minute ago, you were reduced to merely a civilian. Levi nods and turns for the door dragging you after him. You’re halfway down the hall when you hear Hange calling after you.

“Y/n! Levi!” She catches up to you out of breath, her brown eyes forlorn. 

Levi looks over his shoulder at her. 

“I’m sorry.” She breathes and you can see her eyes are watery. “I thought maybe being on my squad wouldn’t be so bad for y/n. Levi, I’m sorry. I didn’t know what to do. I-“ 

He sighs before punching her lightly on the shoulder. She stares at his hand. “Consider us even, Hange.” He says and even you’re surprised that he calls her by name. Levi looks back to you with tired eyes. “Y/n, let’s go home.” 

You nod following him back to his quarters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you all think? I'm feeling so bittersweet. 
> 
> Also as this fic starts to come to a close, what do you think of me writing some one-shots from this story line? I have some ideas for parts I left out because they didn't really fit the progression of the fic as well as future snippets of Reader x Levi.


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter! Hope you enjoy it <3

You’d reached his office and upon entering the room, Levi slumps onto the couch and you follow him. You’re surprised he doesn’t touch the papers littering the floor. Instead he sighs, pulls you into his arms, rubbing circles into your palm with his thumb. 

“Y/n.” He says your name and you look at him. His lips twitch as you watch him and his eyes search your face. “I’m sorry. Everything I did. Everything I was going to do. I was being a fucking asshole.” He takes a deep breath and frowns. You note the regret heavy in his slate eyes and the way his eyebrows meet wrinkling his forehead slightly. “I made the wrong decision. I should have told you…well everything. I shouldn’t have kept Erwin’s letter from you and I shouldn’t have pushed you away.” He bites his lip and you realize that this is the most emotion you’ve seen him express ever. 

“Levi.” You say trying to stop him. He’d said enough in Erwin’s office. Enough for now. 

He shakes his head. “Pushing you away is the stupidest, most fucked up thing I could have done. Y/n, you were right. I am a god damned liar.” He’s staring at you now and he scoops you into his arms, his head cradled in the crook of your shoulder. “I didn’t want to admit it to myself. I didn’t want to hurt you. But I did anyway. Y/n…” His breath is hot against your neck and you gently push him back so you can look at his face. His perfect lips that curl into that smirk you loved, the sharpness of his jaw, his eyebrows that he always raised at you when you did something stupid or he wanted to prove a point. The faint dark circles under his eyes that proved he cared about others, his tragic eyes that had drawn you in from the start. 

You sigh caressing his cheek. “Shut up, Captain. I know.” You say and he glares at you. You can’t help but laugh and he pulls you into his lap. “I think I’ve known all along. I’ve just been fooling myself and convincing myself that you weren’t interested and of course, you being an asshole and pushing me away didn’t help.” He flinches under you but doesn’t say anything. You sigh pressing your forehead to his. “Why are you such a thick-headed bastard?” You ask and he laughs. The sound makes you giddy as does the crooked smile that plays on his lips. 

“I suppose I deserve that.” He breathes.

“Oh, you deserve far worse than that.” You say and you kiss him. Once. Twice. Three times. When you pull away his eyes seem darker. He’s worrying his lip and it is by far the sexiest thing you’ve seen. You smirk kissing him again. His lips. His cheek. The curve of his jaw. His neck. The sharp plane of his exposed collar bone which elicits a sharp intake of breath from him. You smile looking up at him and he kisses you roughly his warm hands hugging your lower back. He pulls away briefly as his fingers brush against the bare skin above the waist of your pants. 

“You’re going to be the death of me, Y/n.” He chuckles. You silence him with another kiss and you gasp as his hands explore your bare back beneath your shirt. You take a deep sobering breath and pull away from him. You crawl out of his lap and level him with a smirk. He pouts throwing you a playful glare before taking your hand in his. He laughs kissing your knuckles. “God, you are the biggest pain in my ass.” He groans and you smile at him.

“Guilty.” You say turning to put the kettle on the fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter had me so giddy writing it. Let me know what you think! And there will be just a chapter or two more before I start some of the little snippets (which I'm super excited for)! Love you guys for reading <3


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are my amazing readers <3 The final chapter in the main story. I love you guys for reading my work and I will be updating with some one-shots for this story either today or tomorrow!

_A Few Days Later_

You walk to drills together. The walk is filled with comfortable silence and you're beyond excited to see your squad again. You reach the training course and Levi gives you a slight smirk. “Welcome back, brat.” He says. You smile taking your place next to Sasha and Jean. They both grin at you. 

“Now that you’re back in action, you ready to kick the Captain’s ass?” Jean says with a smirk. 

Levi glares at him. “I heard that, Jean.” He says and you laugh as Jean glares back.

“Boys, play nice.” You say.

Levi looks to you and you can see his lips twitch. His eyes tell you that there’s no way he’s going easy on Jean. You roll your eyes but smile. 

Sasha pats you on the back. “Don’t worry, y/n. They’re men. It’s just healthy competition.”

You laugh as Eren’s eyebrows furrow together and he frowns. “I’m not sure if I would consider goading Captain Levi healthy.” 

Mikasa sighs. “We have drills to run?” She looks to Levi and he nods.

“Alright brats, you’re running the titan course. Same drill as before. Two of you will be paired against one person. Try to stop them from reaching the titans.” He eyes you before turning for the course. “Let’s go.”

You're paired with Armin and Connie. You shoot off from the ground, your h/c hair whipping around you as propel yourself through the branches. You spot Connie almost immediately above you. He begins to drop down on you but you smile, launching your gear so that your trajectory is up and right towards him. His confused expression is laughable as you shoot off another wire swinging yourself sideways and over the boy. You hit him in the back with the blunt end of your blades and he tumbles through the branches below you. He rights himself just before he hits the ground. 

“Sorry Connie.” You call to him as you reach your first titan. You propel yourself up and curl your body into yourself trying to mimic the way you’d seen Levi and Mikasa cut the nape. The maneuver was successful but sloppy as the nape thudded to the ground. You shrug and your eyes search the trees behind you. You can just make out Jean reaching his first titan. Before he can even touch the nape, Levi charges him knocking him on his ass on the ground. You laugh as he glares up at him and you’re sure he’s having some choice words. Levi’s eyes meet yours through the branches and you feel your heart beat faster.

You take a deep breath; you need to focus. Tearing your eyes from Levi, you spot Armin rushing you. The boy’s blue eyes are filled with determination and it scares you just how much they remind you of Erwin’s eyes. 

“Y/n, I’m sorry!” Armin yells and you raise an eyebrow at his words. He shoots towards you and it’s only as he projects himself past you and around the titan’s head that you realize what he’s doing. Smart boy, you think as you dodge under the wire of his gear before it can pin you to the titan. As Armin comes back around, you smile before kicking him in the chest. He groans and as you rush toward your second titan you can see him dangling from the first trying to figure out his best way of not dropping on his head as he untangles himself. 

You reach the second titan and this time you pull off the maneuver a little better. You launch yourself into the trees. It’s a clear shot to the third. Except as you land on a branch Levi launches himself at you pinning you against the trunk of the tree. His eyes are playful and you don’t know whether you find his smirk irritating or whether you love it. You decide both.

“Did you really think I’d make it easy for you, y/n?” He asks. He’s sheathed his blades and you follow suit reluctantly. He’s trapped you between his body and the tree now, his arms on either side of you. His dark eyes search your face and he grips your chin with his calloused fingers. 

“When do you make anything easy, Levi?” You ask smiling.

He chuckles. The wind is playing with his hair and your heart swells. He kisses you and you run your fingers through his hair enjoying the way the short hairs of his undercut tickle your fingers. He pushes closer, demanding your body be flush against his. He nibbles on your lip and you gasp his name against his lips. You can feel him smile as he pecks you once more on the lips. His eyes shimmer with mischief and you grab his hand before leveling him with a glare. “Levi, I am so getting back at you for that later.” You sigh. Your stomach is working itself into knots as you look at him. 

He leans close placing a kiss right below your ear. “I’m looking forward to it.” He purrs and you shiver at the rough timbre of his voice. 

You can hear someone groan below you and you blush as Mikasa and Sasha stare at the two of you from a short distance away. Mikasa is looking at the two of you with what can only be described as disgust. Sasha on the other hand looks giddy. She’s smiling ear to ear. 

“Go Y/n and Captain Levi!” She yells and even Levi chuckles at her antics. Mikasa smacks Sasha in the back of the head.

“Stop encouraging them. That’s gross.” Mikasa says with a glare in your direction. 

“Mikasa!” You yell and she looks at you. You promptly flick her off and Levi tries not to laugh as her frown deepens. 

Levi kicks you lightly in your calf making you just barely lose your balance. “Come on, brat.” He says and you’re blessed with that crooked smile of his. “We have drills to run.” 

You launch yourself from the branch looking at him over your shoulder. “Catch me if you can, Captain. I’ve improved since I first joined Squad Levi.” You call back.

He chuckles. “I’ll be the judge of that.” 

You smile as you launch yourself through the tree branches. You can hear Levi behind you and your heart swells once again. This is it. Your guilt isn't as heavy in your chest. You're finally free to be surrounded by the people you love. To be with the man you love. You've finally come home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading my fic <3 You guys are amazing and I am in awe with how many have followed this fic! 
> 
> You guys have really made this whole experience amazing and encouraged me to keep writing both fanfiction and my own personal works. You're the best and I hope you look forward to some of the one-shots I will be uploading soon!


	34. You're Drunk Levi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here begins the one shots for this story. Hope you enjoy!

_About a year later_

You’d just come back from a particularly hard mission. Luckily there had been few casualties and after paying your respects, you joined Levi and the other Squad leaders in the mess hall for drinks. Usually Erwin would reprimand them for their drinking on the premises but it was late and he had holed himself up in his office writing reports.

You sit next to Levi who is arguing with Hange about her new shitty experiments that she wanted to test on Eren. His exact words. You stare at him. He’s had a little too much to drink. His cheeks are flushed and as he crosses his arms, his forehead wrinkled as he berates her you can’t help but smile. He’s adorable. 

Mike plops down on the bench next to you and your eyes dart to him as he briefly sniffs in your direction. You still weren’t used to the man’s oddities. “Isn’t Captain Levi more fun when he has a few drinks in him?” He asks a smirk playing on his lips. You chuckle but Mike leans toward you his pale blue eyes taking you in. “Though still, I’ll never understand why someone as beautiful as you chose someone as irritable as Levi.” He sighs putting a hand on your shoulder.

“Oi, Mike.” Levi stumbles to his feet and levels him with a murderous glare. “Hands off.” 

Mike smirks pulling you with him to his feet. You squeak as he wraps his arm around your waist. “Make me, Shorty.” He says and Levi grits his teeth before lowering himself into a fighting position. 

You sigh and you’re not sure if it’s the drink or the fact that you’d had enough bickering for the night. Let alone, the way Levi was glaring at Mike, one of them might actually be seriously injured in this fight. After all, both were drunk and didn’t really pay attention to their limits when they’d had some alcohol in them. 

You do the only logical thing you can think of. You elbow Mike in stomach and when he groans you kick him in the balls. He’s immediately brought to his knees. “Fuck!” He groans. 

Levi glares down at him. “Serves you fucking right, Mike.” He says and you sweep his legs out from underneath him. He tumbles onto his ass and his dark eyes meet yours. His lips are pulled into a pout and he’s glaring up at you. “God damn it, y/n.” He says but his eyes soften and he frowns looking down at the ground beside him. “Marry me.” He grumbles and you stare at him your heart constricting in your chest at his words. 

You laugh. “Levi, I think you’ve had too much to drink.”

His eyes return to yours and he seems a little angry. He gets to his feet clumsily. “I’m not joking.” He says taking your hand in his. The tips of his ears are red now.

“Alright, Captain Ackerman.” You say placing a chaste kiss on his cheek. “We’ll talk about this after you sober up, hmm?” He looks disgruntled and you can’t help but laugh. “Come on. We’re going home.” You say entwining your fingers with his before pulling him towards the door. He doesn’t refuse and as you walk towards the door to the mess hall you can hear Hange call after you.

“I better be invited to the wedding!” She yells nearly spilling her drink all over herself. You chuckle but the inside of your stomach is in knots again. Was Levi serious?

******************************************************************  
It turned out he had been and the two of you got married three weeks later in a small private ceremony. Erwin surprisingly had agreed to officiate and only the members of your squad and some of the squad leaders attended.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you all think? I thought about this one the other day and I find it so adorable <3


	35. Till Death Do Us Part

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My poor little heart as I wrote this...

Storm clouds gather above you, dark and puffy like bruises against the sky. Blood slicks the ground. It had been an ambush. Three titan corpses lay in heaps, steam curling in the breeze. Your squad members were smears of blood against the small spindly trees and nearby decaying building. Tears prick your eyes. It had happened again. Connie and Sasha sit at the foot of the building. Connie’s arm draped around her protectively. He’s missing his right arm. All that’s left of her is her upper half. You look past the approaching titan. Eren is in his titan form, his jaw working as his limbs are devoured by three four-meter titans. You scream at the titan as it gets closer. A seven-meter class. It’s a female but that doesn’t make her any less terrifying. She bares her teeth at you and you can see them painted with the gore of your comrades and angry tears flood your cheeks. 

You go to launch your gear, to end her, when her hand connects with your torso scooping you into the air. You drive your blades into her palm but it does nothing. You kick and scream twisting the blades deeper. Nothing. 

Your eyes wander around you. You have to see him one last time. He’s there. Body draped across the roof. Dark hair clinging to the blood that paints his pale face. You stop your struggling. Blood seeps through his green cloak turning the white wings of freedom red. You gasp at the sight. At Levi laying there motionless. Your heart can’t take it. 

“Move.” You whisper though you know he can’t hear you. “Please. Just move. Breathe. Do anything damn it!” You want to go to him. You want to hold him in your arms. You want to see his sharp jaw. His dark eyes. You want to see him smile like he did on your wedding day. You want his arms wrapped tight around you as he held you on the couch in his office as you read. 

Your vision blurs from your tears and you want to wipe them away. You have to see him. Even if he is just a shadow of the man you love. You scream. “Levi!” 

Darkness engulfs you. The smell of blood encases you and you gag. You can hear the tearing as pain sears through you. You close your eyes. I’m sorry I couldn’t keep you safe, you think. 

“Y/n! Y/n!” 

Your body shakes and you groan. _Just let me be. Just let this be the end._

“Y/n! Wake up.” The voice returns. “God damn it y/n, wake up!”

Your eyes flutter open. Levi fills your vision. His slate eyes are troubled, his eyebrows furrowed. He searches your face a deep frown set upon his lips.

“Levi.” You whisper. He wipes at your cheek with his thumb.

“You’re crying.” He says. You stare up at him and you stroke his cheek. He leans into your touch but continues to stare at you worry evident in his dark eyes. Your hand wanders down his neck, below his collar, and to his chest. A sob rips through you as you feel the steady beat of his heart. He pulls you to him. 

“You were…” You breathe and he strokes your hair.

“I’m here.” He says and you cry into his shoulder. “You’re safe now.” 

“Levi…” You sob and he kisses you on the top of your head. 

“It’s okay. I know. I’m here.” His voice is soft. Music to your ears as you clutch his shirt in your balled fists. 

“I’m so glad.” You say. “I’m so happy you’re safe.” His arms tighten their hold on you and you close your eyes letting him engulf you with his warmth and the rhythm of his beating heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you all think of this snippet. I adore how Reader doesn't even have to explain it to him. Bless them <3
> 
> Also feel free to leave some suggestions for One Shots. Of course, all suggestions will be open to my interpretation. Love you all ❤❤


	36. A Battle Of Wills

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was inspired by a comic I saw while perusing Pinterest the other day. Lord these two <3

You all sat in the mess hall. You’d somehow convinced Levi to join you all for dinner and you try not to chuckle as he sits arms crossed between Connie and Eren. Mikasa sits across from him a smirk lighting up her usually expressionless face. 

“Come on Captain, you have to arm wrestle Mikasa. This is a battle of epic proportions!” Connie whines, leaning just a little too close to him. Levi shrinks away from the boy and bumps shoulders with Eren. He frowns and he looks like he’s trying to become physically smaller before your eyes as he glares at both boys. You stifle a chuckle.

“You scared, Captain?” Mikasa sneers and you watch as his jaw twitches. 

“The fuck I am.” He says uncrossing his arms. Mikasa’s smirk widens and she puts her arm on the table hand open. Levi stares at her hand for a moment and by the way he wrinkles his nose, you know that he’s regretting agreeing to this already. He glares at Mikasa and puts his hand in hers. Eren is grinning ear to ear. 

“Alright, Captain, Mikasa. Go!” Eren says and they both struggle to pull the others’ hand onto the table. Levi looks like he has the upper hand but Mikasa is giving him a hard time. They stay like that for a while, arms trembling in a silent battle of wills. They’re glaring daggers at one another and you watch on genuinely in awe of the two. That damn Ackerman strength, you think to yourself.

“Come on Mikasa!” Armin shouts. 

“Levi, you can beat her sorry ass.” You say and Mikasa takes a moment to glare in your direction. Levi’s eyes flick to you briefly and the battle continues. 

“Well, this is incredibly boring.” Jean says taking a sip of his drink. 

“You don’t have any appreciation for just how strong these two are!” Sasha growls at him. “Though I am surprised that humanity’s strongest is being beat by a girl.” She giggles.

“Fuck this.” Levi growls and he hooks Mikasa’s wrist with his own before slamming her hand down on the table. He levels her with a smirk as he releases her and takes a sip of his tea. 

“You little bastard-“ Mikasa starts rising from her seat to get in his face. Eren grabs her by the waist.

“Nope.” Eren says dragging her away from Levi.

“Who are you calling little, brat?” Levi’s tone is venomous.

“Eren, let me go!” Mikasa yells.

“We are not having you fight the Captain in the mess hall, Mikasa.” Eren groans as she elbows him in the stomach. You feel sorry for him. "Armin, a little help?"

Armin ignores him turning to look at you. “Um, why don’t you battle the Captain, y/n?” He says and you raise your eyebrows.

“What?” You ask.

Armin is grinning now and you can see just a glimmer of mischief in his blue eyes. “You should arm wrestle Captain Levi.”

Levi takes a swig of his tea. He isn’t looking at you. “Pass.” He says. 

“Excuse me?” You ask him, taking a seat across from him. “What the fuck do you mean pass?” 

He sighs. “What are you dense? Means I’m not interested.” 

You throw your arm down on the table, hand at the ready. “Levi, you better fucking arm wrestle me right now or I swear-”

“Swear, what?” He asks finally looking at you. He’s irritated clearly by the way he’s working his jaw and his vice grip around the rim of his cup.

“I won’t kiss you for a god damn month, how about that you ass?” You say annoyed that he won’t do a simple thing like arm wrestle you. 

He takes another sip of his tea and he smirks at you. “Is that really a punishment for me, or you?” He asks and you glare at him.

Sasha gasps next to you. Even Jean seems intrigued by your little tiff with Levi.

“Fuck you.” You say.

The corner of his lips twitch. “Isn’t that against the rules you just set?” He asks and you flush red. What the fuck was his problem? 

Your squad goes quiet and you can feel heat traveling down your chest and to the tips of your ears. Levi sets his tea down and grasps your hand in his. “Fine. If you insist on this nonsense.” He runs his thumb along your wrist before tightening his hand around yours. His dark eyes find yours and your heart nearly skips a beat. He narrows his eyes and you’re caught in his gaze. He tightens his grip on your hand and you struggle to combat his strength as he tries to force your hand onto the table. He doesn’t look away and you’re having trouble focusing. He’s smirking now and you feel the toe of his boot run along your shin. You yelp at the contact and his eyes dance with mischief. He slams your hand down against the table. 

“Aw! And here I thought y/n was going to win.” Sasha says sadly. You completely ignore her as Levi smiles into his cup of tea. What the hell was that? 

You stare at your hand clenching it into a fist in front of you. Did he just use his charms on you to win an arm-wrestling match? You blush and notice Jean is staring at anything but the two of you. Your eyes dart back to Levi who kicks you playfully under the table. You try to kick him back and end up kicking Connie. 

“Aye, who was that?!” Connie yelps.

Levi hides his smirk behind his cup and you glare at him. 

“God damn you two.” Mikasa finally says. “Get a room already.”

Levi chuckles.

“Shut the hell up, Mikasa.” You say rising from your seat and rounding the table so you’re behind Levi.

“A word?” You ask and he shrugs setting down his tea and following you out into the hall. You wheel on him and its only then that you realize how close he is. “What the hell was that?” You ask him and you’re blushing again.

He laughs. “You’re too damn cute when you’re blushing.” He says running his fingers along your jaw. He kisses you, pressing you against the wall and your irritation immediately disappears. His hand wanders to your waist and you flinch as his thumb hooks into the waist of your pants brushing against your bare skin. He kisses your cheek, tilting your head so he has access to the tender skin of your neck. His breath is warm against your skin and you shiver. “Do you see all the possibilities of what we could be doing instead of spending time with a bunch of pubescent teens right now?” He asks and you narrow your eyes at him. He smirks.

“Let’s go home.” He breathes playing with the hem of your shirt. You bite your lip, your heart hammering away in your chest as he stares at you with those dark sexy eyes of his. He takes your hand in his and starts to drag you back to your shared quarters.

“Levi.” You yelp but you don’t resist. You stare at his back in wonder. There’s no way you could resist him, even if you wanted to. You sigh, shaking your head and can’t help but blush. Just what the hell did the squad think of your little spat?

_Back with the squad_

“They’re heading back to their quarters.” Mikasa says rolling her eyes.

“Mikasa, will you shut up please?” Jean says and Armin laughs awkwardly.

“I love them so much.” Sasha says taking a sip of her drink. 

Eren sighs running a hand through his hair. “Just when we thought we might actually get to spend time with the both of them though.”

Connie smirks. “A man’s got needs.” He says. Sasha swats him in the back of the head. “Ouch! Sash, what was that for?” 

Sasha’s cheeks are flushed. “Connie. Just be quiet. Will ya?”

He rubs the back of his head and everyone laughs but Jean who frowns into his cup.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you all think? I really enjoyed writing this, especially because we all know Levi is definitely socially awkward or at least enjoys his personal space, haha! Loved writing the squad's reactions to the two lovebirds too <3


	37. Drunk Shenanigans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy some more drunk shenanigans my readers <3

You’ve had way too much to drink. Your vision swims before you and you close your eyes trying to keep the room from spinning.

“Levi, I command you to pour me another drink.” Erwin says. You smile at the way he slurs his words, you open your eyes and look their way. It’s been awhile since Erwin had drank with all of you and having him join you several times, you finally understood why Levi and Hange even tolerated the man. While he was aggravating and stoic during the day, the man turned into a laughable mess barking orders when he was drunk. 

“Aye, pour me a drink too, Leeeevi.” Hange drapes her arm over Levi’s shoulder and he wrinkles his nose at her. 

“When’s the last time you showered, Shitty Glasses?” Levi asks.

“Not too long ago!” She yelps defensively. Levi doesn’t look convinced.

Hange looks at her arm and immediately removes it shooting you an apologetic look. “Sorry, y/n. Old habits die hard.” She slurs winking at you. 

You laugh a little too loud. “Don’t worry about it, Hange. I’m not the one who gets jealous.”

“I don’t get jealous.” Levi grumbles staring into his now empty shot glass. 

You chuckle and are surprised when Erwin grips your chin between his thumb and index. You go red as he stares down at you with his intense blue eyes. 

“Really? Then you won’t mind if I do this, Levi?” He asks and he leans closer lips pursed. You shuffle backwards. What in fresh hell was he doing? He places a light kiss on your cheek and you stare at him dumbfounded.

You hear the scraping of a chair and a hard thwack as it hits the ground. You look up to see Levi, standing fists clenched. He’s scowling, jaw twitching as he glares at Erwin. Erwin laughs still clutching your arm in his large hand.

“What were you saying, Levi?” He smirks.

Levi storms towards him, prying his fingers from your arm and pulling you into his arms. 

Erwin guffaws. “Levi, you should see your face right now. You look like you might actually be considering murdering me. But you’re hesitant, aren’t you?” 

Hange sips her drink beside him. “Erwin, you’re going to make him angry if you keep teasing him like that.” She sighs.

Erwin bursts into a fit of laughter. “But Hange, look at him.” 

You frown stroking the back of Levi’s hand. You can just barely make out his face beside you and he’s working his jaw, his lips pulled into an adorable pout. You kiss him on the cheek and his eyes find yours. His face flushes and he ruffles your hair before taking a seat next to you blocking you from Erwin in the process. 

“Asshole.” Levi mumbles. Erwin pours you all another drink sliding a shot glass to each of you.

"Offer up your beating hearts, soldiers!” He yells and Levi and Hange roll their eyes at him. You chuckle as every single one of them clutches their fists to their hearts. You do the same. 

Levi throws Hange an exasperated look. “Your hand is on the wrong side, dumbass.” 

You laugh as she switches hands mouth agape at her own stupidity. 

“Drink, damn it!” Erwin shouts and you all down your shots. “Another!” 

You laugh as Levi sighs. He wraps his arm around your waist as he passes you the next round. You drink and you feel so elated in the moment. You wish this night would never end. You loved these drunken fools, even Erwin and his dumbass orders and crazy tomfoolery to get Levi to squirm. You nuzzle into Levi’s shoulder as him and Hange begin to bicker again. 

“Fuck off, Four Eyes.” You catch him say as you sigh contentedly closing your eyes once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love me some Jealous! Levi and our poor boy has to deal with Mike (read You're Drunk Levi, if you haven't already) and Erwin teasing him. Haha! Loved writing their drunken shenanigans <3


	38. Squad Byron, Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to write a bit about Squad Byron. After all, they played such a huge role in Reader's life. Hope you enjoy a little snippet of Reader's life before the Female Titan attack <3 This is quite a bit before the Female Titan attack (two or three months), just for your reference.

“Y/n? What the hell do you think you’re doing? Get your ass in here.” Byron growls and you scramble in line next to your squad members. 

Rhys elbows you, throwing you a shit-eating grin. “Byron’s in a pissy mood. I guess the higher ups noticed you were missing when he talked to them earlier.” Rhy says and you roll your eyes and yawn.

“A girl needs her beauty sleep.” You say pulling your hair into a high ponytail. 

“Morning, y/n.” Anton says and you smile at him. He’s such a sweetheart with his hazel eyes and boyish face. You fight the urge to hug him.

“Aye, y/n, Anton. Shut your god damn mouths.” Byron says and you open your mouth to make a smart retort. Rhys grabs you from behind putting his hand over your mouth. You glare at him over your shoulder.

“I’ve got her, sir.” Rhys says with a wink. Boy is he laying it on thick this morning. Byron’s glare softens and he looks back to the Commander. 

You bite Rhys’s hand and he let’s go with a silent, ‘ow’. You look to the front of the room where your superiors stand. Commander Erwin is his same stoic and seemingly cold self as he addresses the room. You’d missed the beginning of his speech and you try your best to focus.

“Tomorrow, we will be going out beyond the wall. Our goal is to capture a four-meter titan.” The Commander says. You squirm at the word capture. Apparently, you’re not the only one.

“Commander Erwin, sir. You can’t be serious about capturing one of those beasts? Surely, you mean kill.” Someone says and you think his name is Lucas. He’s a part of Marlene’s squad.

You see the Captain stride forward as if to address Lucas. You had almost forgotten he was there. He had a way of seemingly blending into the background whenever he was with the Commander. His eyes were sharp yet his expression remained blank as Commander Erwin put his arm out to stop him from interjecting. 

“You’re right to doubt this mission. After all, so many of our comrades have died at the hands of those _beasts_. Yet I stand by this plan to capture one of them. Squad Leader Hange Zoe is to conduct experiments on this titan to determine their weaknesses. The more we know about them, the better chance we have. If we can learn their weaknesses than that means less of you noble corpsmen will die.” Commander Erwin says with finality. You shiver involuntarily and you feel Rhys’s fingers glide across your hand letting you know you aren’t alone. You take a deep breath and look back to the Commander. “I expect you all to be ready tomorrow to give your hearts for humanity!” He says and he salutes, fist curled over his heart.

You salute with the rest of the corps and your eyes follow the Commander and Captain as they make their way through the crowd. Commander Erwin stops next to Byron and you can see your broad-shouldered squad leader’s back straighten under the Commander’s piercing gaze. “Squad Leader Byron, make sure your squad is there tomorrow. On time.” He says and your cheeks redden. 

“Yes sir!” Byron barks in reply and Captain Levi’s eyes flick to you. You stiffen under his gaze but you don’t look away. His dark eyes search your face and as he turns to leave with the Commander you can see just the faint semblance of a smirk on his lips. 

“You dumbass.” Byron growls and you tear your eyes away from the Captain. Byron is glaring at you and you rub the back of your head. 

“Sorry. I’ll be on time tomorrow.” You say.

“You damn well better be.” Byron says and Rhys pats you on the head. You look back at him and he’s smirking.

“Oh, she will be. Even if I have to drag her ass out of bed.” He says. Byron looks satisfied as you all file out of the room. 

Anton puts a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “Don’t worry about Byron.” He says.

You roll your eyes but laugh. “Trust me. I’ve grown a tolerance for old grumpy ass over there.” You look to Byron hoping he heard you. If he did, he doesn’t react. Anton chuckles and you all head to mess hall for what could very well be your last dinner.

You stare at the unappetizing soup in front of you. You knew the budget for food was small but this was pitiful. There was one carrot and half a potato floating in the broth. You sigh and eat a spoonful. Your eyes wander the mess hall ignoring Byron’s blatant attempts at flirting with one of the few women in the corps. Poor girl, you think and your eyes widen slightly as you see the Captain enter the mess hall with Squad Leader Hange. You’re surprised to see him. He rarely comes to the mess hall, usually taking dinner in his office. You watch his lithe movements as he ignores Hange’s rambling, his expression bored. You wonder if he ever shows any hint of emotion when you feel strong arms pull you into a hug. 

“Y/n, how long are you going to stare at the Captain?” Rhys’s teasing voice says in your ear. You watch Captain Levi roll his eyes at Hange before looking up at Rhys. You flick the back of his hand. His eyes are narrowed and playful as he looks down at you.

“I wasn’t staring.” You say a faint blush on your cheeks.

Rhys laughs. “Hm, I suppose you’re right. Ogling would be the better word.” He says with a wink.

“Fuck you.” You grumble and he ruffles your hair before letting you go. 

“The girl’s got her eyes set high.” Byron’s rough voice says. You scowl at him. You wish you could punch that smirk off of his face. “The Captain doesn’t have an interest in love, or so I’ve heard. Marlene says he’s from the underground, poor bastard probably doesn’t even know what love is. You should set your sights lower.”

You glower at Byron and his asinine comment. It made you angry for some reason. For him to judge the Captain so harshly just because of where he came from. You’d heard the underground was a horrible place, but everyone had their fucked-up history and who the fuck were you to judge, let alone someone like Byron. You smirk. “Lower? Like you? I think I’ll pass.” You say and Anton struggles to keep himself from spitting out his drink. 

Byron’s eyebrow twitches. “You couldn’t handle someone like me anyway.” He growls.

You narrow your eyes, your smirk growing. “You’re right. I probably wouldn’t be able to fill that filthy appetite of yours.” 

“Y/n.” Rhys says swatting your shoulder.

Byron glares and bursts into laughter. “Y/n, you’ve got fire in you. That’s for damn sure. Whoever ends up with you, I don’t envy the poor bastard.” 

Anton sighs. “Can you two get along for two seconds, please? I swear I don’t know how we function as a squad.”

Rhys claps Anton on the back. “They are getting along, Anton. As best as their egos will allow anyway.” 

You roll your eyes but laugh. Rhys throws you a smile and you smile back. You couldn’t ask for a better squad. Even if Byron was a pain in the ass. You love your brother’s reliability and Anton’s endearing nature. You watch them talk and joke as you finish your dinner and you can’t help but feel content with the cards you've been dealt since the fall of Wall Maria.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you all think? Please let me know! Love you guys <3


	39. Squad Byron, Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to write some action with Squad Byron. Hope you enjoy it <3

You and your squad reach the rendezvous point. You’re positioned on top of a small outcrop of abandoned buildings and you survey the small group of titans before you. Your squad was given the task of baiting the titans and you know Byron is pissed at you, pegging the blame on you for making the Commander unhappy with your squad’s performance. You sigh as Byron stands feet readjusting on the loose shingles of the roof.

“Anton.” He says. “You’ll be bait.”

“Shit.” Anton curses and you can see the fear in his eyes briefly as he nods.

Byron looks to you and Rhys. “Y/n, Rhys. Your job will be taking out the two six-meter titans. I’ll take the ten-meter.” He looks back at Anton. “Anton once we take out the other three, I need you to lure it into that thicket of trees. The 4th and 5th squad along with the Specials Ops squad will be waiting there to capture it.” 

“Roger!” You all chime in unison. 

Byron takes a deep breath. “Let’s get these bastards.” You all shoot off in separate directions. You watch Rhys position himself in a nearby tree waiting for Anton to make his move. You worry your lip at the determined look in his eye. You shoot off to stand on a rooftop overlooking the small band of titans. Anton swings closer than anyone, shooting directly in front of the ten-meter titan. You watch as it snaps out of its near comatose state. Its limbs are sluggish at first and then you watch in horror as it lunges forward, arm tangling in Anton’s line. 

“Anton!” You scream and you react before you can even think about the consequences. Anton crashes into a nearby rooftop and you watch in horror as it hovers over him ready to devour him. Anton shuffles backwards on the roof eyes never leaving the seemingly unhinged jaw of the titan. 

“Y/n!” Byron yells. “Focus on the mission! Get the hell after your six-meter.” You watch him whisk by you descending on the nape of the ten-meter. You let out a breath you’d been holding as it refocuses its attention on Byron and steam starts to rise from the base of its neck. You propel yourself towards your six-meter. It’s an ugly thing with rolling shoulders and no hair. You land on its arm and just nearly dodge it as it lunges at you with gnashing teeth.

“Fuck.” You curse to yourself as you swing over its shoulder. You prepare your arms for the jarring motion of cutting the nape but instead are met with a dull pain in your body as the titan thrashes you with its head. You look sideways to see Rhys swinging toward you his mouth moving. You plummet sideways and the air is forced out of you as you hit the rooftop of a building. Byron sets off a flare and you just barely register that its black. An abnormal. 

The sky fills your field of vision as you try to will yourself to breathe. Finally, air fills your lungs but so does a sharp pain. “Y/n!” Rhys skids to a halt beside you, shingles flying everywhere as he leans over you. “Are you okay?” He asks. His eyes search your face and your body as he cradles your head in his lap. 

You take another breath. “Fine.” You manage. “Help me up.” Rhys is frowning as he lifts you to your feet and you hate it. Your ribs and back hurt but otherwise you feel fine. You take a hesitant step and when you don’t fall, you smile. Rhys quickly checks your gear for damage.

“Fuck that was close.” He says and though he’s smiling now you can still see the fear lingering in his eyes. He refocuses his attention on the abnormal that is now chasing the four-meter titan and Anton. Byron is following but he can’t get close enough to land a blow. 

You look at Rhys. “I have an idea.”

You shoot off toward the abnormal expending more gas than you probably should. You reach Byron and he throws you a troubled look over his shoulder but you can see the relief there too. Rhys joins you and as you reach the thicket of trees you yell back to him. “Rhys, now!”

You rip your line from the tree and Rhys loops around a high branch his free hand held out to you. You grip his wrist and he swings you toward the titan. You let go at the pinnacle of the swing and you launch your line into the titan’s shoulder. You’re about to reel yourself in when something dark darts toward the titan. You see the brief flutter of the Wings of Freedom before the soldier plummets toward the nape spinning in a deadly whirlwind of blades. Blood splatters everywhere making it even as far as your cheek before it burns away into steam. You recoil your line aiming for a tree branch instead. You land on the branch, staring down at the abnormal in wonder as it topples to the ground. The soldier stands firmly at the base of its neck and its only when they look back at you that you realize it’s Captain Levi. He’s covered in blood though its receding into steam. His hard eyes look past you and you see Byron standing on a branch to your right frowning. Rhys catches up with you and the Captain works his jaw.

“Byron, get your asses in gear. We still have the four-meter to catch.” Captain Levi says.

Byron nods. “Yes, Captain Levi, sir.” He says saluting. 

Levi’s eyes find yours and he frowns. “Tch.” He tuts before launching himself back towards the remainder of the corps and the four-meter titan.

Byron looks at you and sighs. “Come on. Both of you.” 

You follow him through the trees feeling your insides squirm. You’d made a mockery of your squad to both the Commander and Captain all in one day. You swallow your feelings, you had to make this right. You decide the best way to remedy this is to focus on your mission and Anton’s retreating form. 

*************************************************  
Your mission had been a success. The four-meter titan was quickly subdued by your squad along with the 4th, 5th, and Squad Levi and you transported it back behind the wall with little difficulty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Reader has always had a soft spot for the Captain though I feel like after this encounter she became a little saltier towards him especially because she felt like she wasn't being a good enough soldier/contribution to her squad. And well you know the rest. 
> 
> Let me know what you thought of this chapter. I love Squad Byron and I feel so bad that we didn't get more time with them though of course I adore Squad Levi as well <3


	40. Starry Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So guys, I spent way too much time on this chapter. I adore this and everything that has evolved between Reader and Levi and this is just too damn precious. Enjoy this chapter from the bottom of my heart <3

You run your finger along the rim of the picture frame. You’d added your own to the shelf on the wall and your old squad mates stare back at you. You stroke Rhys’s smiling face and sigh heavily. It’d been over a year now but that didn’t make it any easier. You woke up some days still expecting him to drag you out of bed chastising you for oversleeping. 

“Y/n.” Levi says and you set the frame down and look at him. He’s sprawled out on the couch. Legs crossed and head resting on the top of the couch. He holds a shot of whiskey in his left hand and he’s frowning. “Come here.” He says and you do just that his free arm wrapping around your waist as he pulls you to him. You rest your head against his chest and you hear him sigh. He strokes your hair. “You miss him.” It wasn’t a question, rather a fact he knew was true. He downs his shot and you play with a button on his shirt. 

“Yeah. I’ve been dreaming about him lately.” You say and he places a soft kiss on your temple. 

“Tell me more about Rhys.” He says and your lips twitch into a faint smile. 

“What do you want to know?” You ask.

“What was it like growing up inside Shiganshina?” He asks.

“Hm.” You hum and your mind wanders to when you and Rhys were kids. “It was happy mostly. We only had our mom though but she made sure we were always taken care of. Dad was part of the Survey Corps.” You frown as you remember the day a soldier had shown up at your childhood home and told you your father was never coming home again. You stop fidgeting with his button and he sets his glass down on the table pulling you further into his arms. His fingers dance across your hands rubbing soothing circles. You take a breath before continuing. “Rhys and I idolized him. He’s one of the reasons I joined.” You say. 

“You were talking about your childhood being mostly happy?” Levi says redirecting you to a happier topic. You grasp his hand in yours admiring the callouses along his fingers. Proof that he put in the work and dedication to be a part of this world. “Y/n?”

“Sorry.” You mumble. “Childhood. Right. Let me think.” You bite your lip trying to remember something that might interest him. There are a lot of embarrassing tales of you and Rhys. Stealing a pie from your neighbor’s window one day and getting chastised by your mother. Getting berated by the garrison soldiers for trying to climb what little your spindly kid legs could of the wall. “I think my best memories were of us just being together. Mom making meals in the evening. She always made the most of whatever we could scrounge up. Some of her dishes put our rations to shame.” This gets a chuckle out of Levi. “We’d eat dinner together. Rhys was always so boisterous. Always so full of life. Usually we’d spar after dinner. It’s something our dad taught us to do from a young age. He wanted to make sure we knew how to protect ourselves. Especially me. It’s weird. At some point Rhys picked up the mantra he used to say to me. Oh gosh, what was it?” You worry your lip trying to grasp at the distant memory. “Something about being able to beat the shit out of the guy I’d marry one day? Or was it to keep me from getting married? Oh, something like that. I forget the exact words.” You say and Levi snorts and kisses your ear. 

“Whatever the phrasing, you can hold your own and for that I’m grateful.” He breathes and you lean back to look at him. He’s smiling. 

You wrinkle your nose at him. “I’d say so. I can kick your ass any day now because of them.” You say and he rolls his eyes. You readjust yourself in his lap so you can get a better look at his face. 

“I wouldn’t get a head of yourself, brat.” He grumbles narrowing his eyes and this time you laugh. The crooked smile is back. He tilts his head. “I wonder if I would have gotten along with Rhys.”

You snort. “I’d like to think you would but I don’t think that would have been likely. Rhys was an endless tease and a smart ass. With your grumpy attitude, I doubt you two could have stayed in the same room together.”

“Grumpy?” He asks scowling and you giggle.

“Yes, Levi. You’re grumpy and a pain in the ass mostly.” You say. Levi grabs your wrist and you squeak at the sudden pressure. He places a kiss against your knuckles and you glare at him. “Pain in the ass.” You confirm though you’re blushing. Your mind wanders to Rhys and your time in Byron’s squad. Your blush creeps to your ears as you remember his relentless teasing for staring at the very man that was holding you in his arms now. 

“Something wrong?” He asks. You shake your head and debate whether you should share. You’re embarrassed.

“Nothing. Rhys just used to tease me all the time, especially once we were stationed as members of Byron’s squad.” You say.

“About anything in particular?” He asks.

You avert your eyes, staring at the back of your hand. “You actually.” 

“Me?” He asks and there’s surprise and something else in his voice but you can’t put your finger on it. Levi cups your cheek and makes you look at him. His narrowed eyes and faint smirk make you squirm and aren’t doing wonders for your already red face. “What do you mean?”

“I sort of admired you.” You admit not looking him in the eyes. “Not in like a creepy stalker way. I don’t know. You were, I mean you still are, strong. And you were a loner. I guess you were just sort of this mystery I couldn’t solve so I paid more attention to you then I should of. Especially for some poor girl from Shiganshina who was barely a decent soldier.” 

“Y/n.” He says and your eyes meet his again. He’s trying to keep himself from smirking. “Is that why I caught you staring at me during strategy meetings all the time?”

“You noticed?” You yelp. He kisses your forehead the smirk finally playing across his lips.

“You were pretty obvious. You were the only one not looking at Erwin when he spoke.” He says and you bite your lip ridiculously embarrassed. “As for you not being a decent soldier. I think that’s far from the truth. You’re more capable than most. Hell, like you said, you can almost beat my ass now and I’m humanity’s strongest.” He rolls his eyes at the title he’d been given even though you both knew it was true. A memory flashes across your mind of Levi’s disapproval of you but you dismiss it. His words are enough now. 

“Levi,” You say and he raises an eyebrow. You pick at the hem of his shirt nervously. “You’ve never told me about your childhood.” He stiffens, all the playfulness gone from his features. You caress his cheek. You knew it was a sore topic but it hurt a little bit that he never shared. “Sorry.” You say preparing to change the subject.

“No. It’s okay.” He says though you can see his jaw work as he grinds his teeth. “What do you want to know?”

“Did you have any family in the Underground?” You ask. 

He takes a deep breath before he speaks. “Yes, and no.” You wait for him to explain fiddling with the cuff of his sleeve. “I had my mother briefly. She died when I was seven.” You feel your heart constrict in your chest at the sadness that seeps into his voice and the shadows that flicker in his eyes. 

“What was she like?” You dare to ask and he furrows his eyebrows.

“She was kind. During the day I was her world. She always made sure I had enough to eat, even if it meant she went without. She’d read to me from this tattered old book about some ridiculous kid who’d go on adventures.” He chuckles dryly. “I remember I’d always get so fixated on her descriptions of the night sky. A blanket of stars. It was almost like she’d seen it.” You squeeze his hand; you hadn’t even really thought about what it had meant to live in the Underground before you’d met Levi. Your childhood had been sunshine and open blue skies, sorrow fills you as you think about a younger Levi not even getting the chance to see such things. You look up at him searching his face, trying to imagine just all that he had been through. 

“You said you were her world during the day?” You ask and he flinches his dark eyes finally meet yours.

“She was a prostitute, y/n.” He says and you instantly feel bad for asking. He sighs. “I didn’t really know that then. Not entirely. I figured it out later. Especially once Kenny took me in.” He shudders next to you and you decide not to pry. He looks at you and you feel awful for even asking him about his past. You’re grateful that he’s sharing but you want to rub the painful crease out of his forehead and kiss away the frown at his mouth. 

“You don’t have to say anything else.” You say and he pulls you close, strong arms wrapping around you. 

“Let’s just say the Underground was my personal hell.” He says. “And I’m happy to be here. With you. Doing some sort of good.” 

“Levi.” You say his name and he looks down at you. You kiss him gently. On the lips. His cheek. His nose. Leaving a trail of kisses along his jaw and to his forehead. “I’m so happy you’re here with me.” You say and he gives you a faint smile. You sigh, it isn’t enough. You want to erase his sadness. After all it was you who had dug it up. You look out the window taking in the darkness. An idea begins to form in your mind. You stand up pulling his arm.

“What?” He asks.

“Come with me.” You say and he reluctantly gets up from the couch. You pull him out into the hall and through the barracks until you reach a set of stairs. They’re usually only used by maintenance or the technicians. You pull him up the stairs and curse as you nearly trip. 

“Where are we going?” He asks but you don’t indulge him with an answer. You turn down a hall and reach a door. You fling it open. The cool night air envelops the two of you and you grin pulling Levi out into the open. “Y/n?”

“Levi, would you be quiet and just look up?” You say holding his hands in yours. He frowns but lifts his head. The stars shimmer against the black sky. Levi visibly relaxes before you. The tension in his muscles is gone, the frown no longer pulling at his lips. He smiles and he pulls you into his chest. 

“They’re beautiful.” He says and he squeezes you tighter. “Just like you.” He kisses the top of your head and you will yourself not to cry. How could someone so kind endure so much hardship? It wasn’t right. “Hey, why are you crying?” He asks tilting your head so you look at him. He brushes away your tears.

“Nothing.” You say. “I’m just happy to be here with you looking at the stars.” His eyes soften and he sighs.

“Come here, brat.” He says and he pulls you towards the corner of the rooftop where you both sit. He holds you in his arms as you both stare up at the sky, at the never-ending blanket of stars.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think. I adore this chapter so much and I really wanted to emphasize just how much Levi deserves some god damn happiness. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I did writing it <3


	41. Squad Assessments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Love this! I hope you all enjoy <3

You sit on the couch watching Levi pour over his work. It’s late and he’s lit a lantern to see his work better. The light from the flame flickers across his face and you can’t help but worry your lip at how enticing it makes him. Levi takes a sip of his tea, it’s his fifth cup of the night, and you yawn trying your best to keep your eyes open. You had told yourself you were going to wait until he was done with reports so you could go to bed together, yet as his pen streaks across yet another piece of paper, you wonder if he’ll ever sleep tonight. 

“Levi.” You groan. “Are you almost done?” 

His lip twitches into a frown. “Just go to bed, y/n.” He says but he doesn’t look at you, his eyes fixed on the paper in front of him. You frown rising from the couch. You stretch your arms over your head, hoping to shake some of your tiredness. It isn’t terribly effective. You walk to his desk, draping your arms around his shoulders. “Y/n.” He says and you can tell he’s trying not to get irritated with you. You know you’re bothering him but you can’t help it. You just want him to be done with his reports so he can hold you while you fall asleep.

“Hm?” You hum. 

He sighs. “You’re distracting me.” 

“Maybe I can help you with whatever this is so you can come to bed?” You ask motioning toward the pile of papers. “What are you working on anyway?”

He flicks the end of his pen against the stack of papers. “Assessments for the squad.” He says.

“Really?” You ask intrigued now. You snatch a paper from the stack. “Sasha Blouse. She’s come a long way since joining Squad Levi.“You say though the paper reads Special Ops squad which elicits a groan from Levi. “She’s far more capable than I originally thought. She’s been practicing her form in hand-to-hand combat and shows great aptitude for her 3D maneuver gear. She’s an asset to the Special Ops squad. Though she has a weird obsession with food and isn’t the bravest, she helps her squad mates in any way she can. Even going as far as exhausting her own stamina and resources to ensure their safety.” You smile. “Aw, Levi. That’s sweet.” You say and he rolls his eyes at you. 

“Give me that.” He says taking the paper from you and placing it back in the stack. You smirk snatching another one.

“Oi, brat.” He growls as you dance out of his reach. “Jean Kirstein.” You look up at him and he’s scowling at you. “Oh, this is going to be good I’m sure.” You say and he pinches the bridge of his nose but doesn’t move from his chair. “Kirstein is an asset to Squad Levi.” Your eyes widen as you read. “He shows true leadership skills and the capability to work out cohesive plans under pressure. He’s shown great promise and has the trust of his squad mates.” You stop reading to look at Levi. He’s avoiding looking at you and you can see the faintest hint of blush on his cheeks. You smirk. “Levi. Since when did you become such a softy? I was half expecting you to throw Jean under the bus and talk about how he always is arguing with Eren or that he doesn’t particularly like you.” 

“Tch. He doesn’t have to like me. He just has to follow orders, which he does.” He says. You shake your head and return the paper to the stack. “Are you done, y/n?” He sighs clearly exasperated. 

You smile at him kissing him on the cheek. “Just one more.” You grab the paper with your name written on it. Levi grabs your wrist and you switch the paper to your other hand. Your eyes widen in shock as you read. “Though I know you’ll take into account my personal bias, I can truly say that y/n is one of the strongest soldiers on the Special Ops squad rivaling even Mikasa Ackerman. She’s dedicated in her duty to protect the interests of not only her squad mates but humanity as a whole.” There’s a large gap between what you’d read the next paragraph that he’d written. “Y/n is a godsend and anyone is lucky to be in her presence. She’s quirky, a pain in the ass, but is willing to put others before herself. Even someone like me. She’s distracting me as I write this.” Levi turns a shade of red you’ve never seen before and he rises from his chair. 

“Brat, give that to me. Now.” He growls. 

You smirk at him trying to keep him at bay as you continue to read. “How can someone look like a god damn mess and still look beautiful? God damn it, I really need to focus. But I can’t stop looking at the cute pout on her lips as I’m writing this or the way her hair is falling over her shoulders and how much I want to be running my hands through it instead of writing these shitty reports for Erwin.”  
Levi finally manages to seize the paper from you and you stare at him biting your lip. The tips of his ears are red and he isn’t looking at you. 

“Levi.” You say but he just shoves the piece of paper into his desk and doesn’t respond. You wrap your arms around his waist and rest your head on his back. “You weren’t really going to send that to Erwin, were you?” You giggle and he squirms in your arms.

“Of course not, brat.” He scoffs and you smile into his shirt. 

“Levi?” You say.

“Hm?”

“Can I write an assessment on you?” You ask.

“Why in the hell would you want to do that?” He asks and you squeeze him tighter.

“I want to.” You say. “Not for Erwin though, for you.” You let him go and walk in front of him so you can get a clear view of his face. You stroke his cheek and he finally looks at you though there’s still a hint of embarrassment across his features. You hold his hand as you begin to speak. “As for Levi Ackerman, he’s one of the strongest, kindest men I know. Though he’d never let you know that unless he allows you to get close to him. He’s prickly and sarcastic but he has a way of inspiring people to do things. He’s a leader. Humanity’s strongest.” You chuckle as he fidgets uncomfortably. “He has a way of getting results and has a bigger heart than most believe. He’s a fine soldier, but he’s also an amazing man. And I’m lucky to have him.” You finish and he rolls his eyes, sighing as he rests his forehead against yours. 

“There’s no way you’re writing that down on paper.” He breathes and you laugh. He lifts your chin and kisses you. “I don’t want anyone else reading that.” 

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” You say and he sighs running his finger along your jaw and through your hair. He looks back at the assessments he’d been writing and lets out a deep breath.

“Let’s go to bed.” He says. “I’ll finish them in the morning.” And with those words he grasps your hand in his, pulling you into your room. Finally, with his arms around you, you’re able to fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just imagine Levi being sleepy and aggravated that he's still up doing these reports and he starts just train of thought writing this. Freaking adorable. Let me know what you think. Thanks for reading guys <3


	42. You Want To Do What Now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dear god, I love the ridiculousness of this chapter. Hope you enjoy <3

Levi stares at you, eyebrows scrunched together and lips pulled into a frown. You can tell he thinks you’re crazy right now. You sigh pushing a piece of hair out of your face. “Levi, please?”

He crosses his arms. “Explain it to me again, brat. You want to do what with your 3D Maneuver gear?” 

You blush looking at your feet as you kick the dirt. “It’s just something I saw Sasha and Connie do and I wanted to give it a try.”

“Uh huh.” He says. “And?”

“You just launch your gear into a branch and just sort of hang there while the other person pushes you.” You say.

“You want to turn our titan killing gear into a swing, y/n?” He says his lips twitching. He looks like he might laugh at you. 

“Shut up, Levi!” You say punching him in the arm. He snorts shaking his head.

“You’re such a child.” He says but he doesn’t turn to leave. 

“Does that mean you’ll help me?” You ask.

He sighs. “Do I have a choice? If I’m not here, you’ll just bust your ass getting back down.”

You’re grinning now and you start hopping on your toes. He rolls his eyes at your excitement.

“Okay, okay. Let’s do this.” You say dragging him to a nearby tree. It’s relatively tall but there’s a branch at just the right height for you to hang safely. You grab the operating device prepared to pull the trigger to launch your lines into the branch. It feels awkward in your hands without the weight of the blades.

“Wait.” Levi says and you pause looking at him. He runs his fingers along the straps of your harness, pulling on them to make sure they’re secure and he double checks the buckles. You blush as he checks the ones at your waist and thighs. Once satisfied that its safe, he nods. You smile at him and pull the triggers. The lines whir and jut into the branch with a satisfying thud. You pull on the lines testing if the branch will hold your weight. 

You propel yourself upward so you’re hanging just a foot off the ground. “It worked!” You say and he shakes his head as you hang there swaying slightly. 

He walks behind you and you hear him sigh. “And you call me a pain in the ass.” He says as he puts his hand to your back and pushes you. You swing forward stiffening your legs to keep yourself from falling on your face. 

You laugh as he pushes you again. “Okay, this was so worth it.” The wind is tugging at your hair and the feeling of your body floating above the ground is elating. Especially since you aren’t having to shift your weight too much like you did when you used the gear on a regular basis. He pushes you again. “Push me a little bit harder.” You say and he does just that. Except you lose your balance and just barely catch yourself, your face inches from the ground. 

“Levi, what the hell are you two doing?” You hear Mike’s voice and you look up to see him staring at the two of you with raised eyebrows. Levi steps out from behind you and you blush realizing that what Mike had seen probably looked really bad. For hell’s sake, your ass was in the air. You push up with your arms getting your balance again as Levi stalks over to him hands in his pockets. He glares up at him and you realize just how tall Mike is. You know Levi isn’t the tallest, but lord this man is a giant. 

“Mike, you tell anyone what you just saw and you’re a fucking dead man.” Levi growls and Mike looks down at him scowling.

It doesn’t last long as he laughs at Levi putting a hand on his shoulder. Levi flinches under its weight. “My lips are sealed, Levi.” He smirks and Levi looks like he might punch him. “Y/n.” He waves to you and winks. “I’ll leave you two lovebirds to it.” You know the tips of your ears are red now. 

“What the fuck…” You breathe to yourself as he walks off. Levi stalks back toward you dusting off his shoulder. He levels you with a glare. 

“You happy now?” He asks his jaw twitching and you giggle at how irritated and clearly embarrassed he is. “Something funny?” He asks lifting an eyebrow.

“Nope. Nothing.” You say but he stalks closer looking up at you. He looks into your eyes as he places his hand on your stomach. 

“You think this is funny, don’t you?” He asks as he glares up at you.

“I never said that.” You’re having trouble stifling your laugh. You can feel the corners of your lips trying to tug into a smile.

He pushes you hard and you swing away from him. He turns and stalks off raising a hand in a wave over his shoulder. “Have fun getting down by yourself.” 

“Levi, wait!” You call after him. He doesn’t stop. “Shit.” You say fidgeting with your gear trying to retract the lines. You’re finally able to and you do exactly as he predicted, you fall on your ass hard. “Ouch.” You hiss getting to your feet. You jog after him and only when you catch up to him can you see the smirk on his lips.

He snorts. “Idiot.” He says taking your hand in his.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you all think? Let me know. Reader is definitely ridiculous but I love this. Thanks for reading <3


	43. Happy Birthday, Levi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really adored writing this! Hope you enjoy this chapter <3

“We’re not going and that’s final.” Levi says untangling himself from his harness. He’s irritable today and you are trying your hardest to understand what has him so riled. 

“Levi.” You sigh and he starts to unbutton his shirt heading for the shower. You grab his hand before he can walk away from you. “I don’t understand. You have to tell me what you’re thinking.” He glares back at you and you’re surprised by the coldness you see there. You let go of his hand frowning.

“I don’t have to explain. I said we’re not going.” He says shucking off his shirt and walking into the bathroom. He’s about to close the door and you clench your fists, stopping it with your boot.

“Levi Ackerman, I swear to god. Talk to me.” You say.

He looks at your foot his jaw twitching. “I don’t have anything to say.” He says and you’ve had it. You push the door open and tumble into the bathroom. He grasps your wrists in his hands to keep you from falling. 

You glare up at him. “You’re being a fucking asshole.” You say. “It’s just a god damn birthday party and you’re acting like it’s the end of the god damn world.” 

He wrinkles his nose at you, his hands tightening around your wrists. It hurts but you won’t tell him that. You won’t let him win.

“Levi, Hange has put a lot of work into this.” You say and his frown deepens at your words. “I’ve put a lot of work into this. We just want to do something fucking nice for you.” 

“I didn’t ask for you to do anything nice for me.” He growls though his eyes have softened a bit. His grip on your wrists loosens and your hands fall to your side. 

You sigh taking a step closer. He doesn’t look at you. “Levi, you have to tell me what’s wrong. I can’t guess what you’re thinking and I don’t want to argue on your birthday.” You say placing a hand on his bare chest. You can feel his heart beating under your fingertips, quick and erratic. You cradle his face in your hand. “Levi, what is it?” You ask and he finally looks at you. There’s sadness etched into his features and fear clinging to shadows of his eyes. 

“I don’t like my birthday.” He says quietly. 

“But why?” You ask your eyes searching his face trying to read the answer there. You’ve never seen him like this except when he got drunk.

“I’m always seeing the people who aren’t there.” He says and you feel your heart squeeze. “Every year, someone else isn’t there to celebrate it with me.”

You don’t know what to say. You know he constantly fights with his survivor’s guilt. With the loss of his friends, his comrades. The people that mattered to him. So instead of words you grab him by the shoulder and pull him to you. You hold him running your fingers through his dark hair. You try to fight back your tears. It isn’t fair. He should be enjoying his birthday. Enjoying being surrounded by his friends and yet here he was angry, irritable, and sad. “I’m sorry.” You breathe. “I didn’t think about it that way.”

“It’s okay.” He sighs into your shoulder wrapping his arms around you. “It isn’t anyone’s fault.”

“Levi, we don’t have to go if you don’t want to.” You say taking a step back so you can look at him. “We can just stay home. I’m sure Hange and the squad will understand.” You pause biting your lip. “I’ll make them understand.”

He strokes your cheek with the back of his hand. “No. It’s okay.” He sighs again. “I’m being an ass.” 

“You aren’t.” You say confused by his sudden change in mood. 

“I am. I’m making you cry.” He says.

“What?” You ask and he wipes away tears you hadn’t even been aware were spilling down your cheeks. 

He furrows his eyebrows, staring at you as you wipe at your cheeks furiously. “I’m not crying.” You say defensively. You hate your eyes for betraying you. 

He chuckles softly. “Y/n, you’re a terrible liar.” He takes a deep breath. “Let me take a shower and we’ll go.”

“No, Levi, we don’t have to. I promise it’s not that big of a deal.” 

He gives you a faint smile ruffling your hair. “I want to. Not just because you were crying. I don’t know, I’m just not good at this, y/n. I’m not good at seeing the good in things. But I want to especially because you do.”

“Levi.”

“We’ll go and if I can’t handle it, we can always come home.” He says giving your hand a gentle squeeze.

“Of course. I just want you to have a good time.” You say.

He nods, motioning to the door with his chin. “Now go unless you plan on joining me.” He says with a hint of a smirk. 

You smile, rolling your eyes before pecking him on the cheek. “I’ll go get ready.” You say. Any other day, you would have joined him but you didn’t want to push him. He seemed more fragile today than you’d seen him in a while. You sigh heading to the room to change clothes. 

Once ready, you and Levi head to the mess hall hand in hand. He takes a deep breath and you squeeze his hand reassuringly as you both step into the room. You’re met by a cacophony of noise and streamers hanging from nearly every surface. 

“Happy birthday, Captain!” Your squad yells. You can’t help but smile at them. Even Jean looks genuine. Hange barrels toward Levi wrapping her arms around him. He tries to pry her off.

“Shitty glasses, get off of me.” He growls.

“Happy birthday, Shorty!” She chimes grinning.

“Squad Leader, you might want to let him go before he gets mad.” Moblit says with an awkward smile. Hange ignores him ruffling Levi’s hair. Levi swats at her and she teeters just out of reach. You look at him, he’s blushing and though he’s glaring at everyone you can tell he’s not hating being there. 

“Moblit, you really are a spoilsport.” Hange pouts as he hands her a drink. Erwin and Mike approach next. 

Erwin puts his hand on Levi’s shoulder and smiles. “Happy birthday, Levi.” He says.

Levi looks at him, his lips twitching as if he wants to smile. “Thanks, Erwin.”

Mike steps closer putting his large hand on Levi’s head ruffling his hair even more. He leans down to look him in the eye. “Happy birthday, you old grump.” He smirks and Levi let’s go of your hand to shove Mike away.

“Fuck off, Mike.” Levi says fixing his hair and Mike laughs throwing you a wink. You’re thankful Levi didn’t catch the gesture. 

“Come on, enough with your endless grumpiness.” Hange says grabbing him by the hand. “We’re here to celebrate.” She pulls him to a table and slides him a drink. You take a seat next to him. Sasha shuffles towards the two of you. “Captain, y/n. You have to try the cake!” 

Levi stares at her eyebrows furrowed as she shoves a piece of cake in front of him. “Um, thanks.” He says though his hand goes to his drink first. You watch him take a sip, searching for any change in his features that might show how uncomfortable he is. He catches you looking at him and he gives your knee a light squeeze. 

“So, Levi, you have to tell me your secret.” Hange whines taking a seat in front of him. Moblit sits to her left. 

“Not this again.” Moblit sighs taking a drink. Levi glares at her and you wonder what she’s about to ask.

“How do you keep yourself looking so young?” She says pouting. “I’m younger than you and I have grey hairs coming in for goodness sake.”

“Hange.” Erwin says trying to stop her but she waves him off. You take a sip of your own drink.

“Come on, Levi. You’re thirty-five and you look like you’re in your damn twenties still. What’s your secret? Oooo, could it be what some of the recruits are talking about? Could you be one of those monsters that drink blood and don’t age?” She scratches her cheek looking at him in awe.

Levi wrinkles his nose staring at her like she’s got three heads. “What the fuck are you on about?” 

Hange smirks looking toward you. “Does he drink your blood, y/n?”

“What?” You nearly spit out your drink. 

Erwin, Mike, and Moblit sigh in unison.

Levi kicks her under the table and she yelps. “You’re fucking insane.” He growls. “Like I’d do something that fucking disgusting.” He takes another sip of his drink while Hange pouts.

“I heard it’s because he doesn’t have a soul.” Sasha says and all eyes go to her. 

“Sash.” Connie says gripping her by the shoulder, a look of horror on his face.

Levi puts down his drink pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Sasha, dear lord.” Eren says. “She doesn’t mean that, Captain. It’s just something the recruits say because they’re terrified of you.”

“Great.” Levi sighs, and you grab his hand rubbing circles into the back of it. 

“It’s a compliment, Captain. They’re just scared because of how amazing you are in the field.” Armin tries to cover for Eren and Sasha’s stupidity.

Erwin laughs and Levi looks up at him scowling.

“Not you too.” Levi sighs but Erwin just smiles.

“You should take it as a compliment. Levi, what everyone’s trying to say is that you’re a blessing. To us and to humanity. Though I will admit, even I’m astounded by your ability to seemingly not age but I won’t question it. I’m sure y/n is grateful for that trait.” Erwin winks at you and you blush. You were baffled by everyone’s awkward musings. You’re surprised when you hear Levi laugh beside you.

“You’re all a bunch of idiots.” He says shaking his head. He visibly relaxes in front of your eyes and you can’t help but smile.

“Oh! Levi, we got you gifts!” Hange squeaks rushing off to the other side of the room. She shoves a large crudely wrapped gift in front of him.

“You got me gifts?” Levi asks genuinely surprised. 

Hange bounces on her toes ignoring his question. “Well go on, open it. That’s from Mike, Moblit, and I.” 

Levi unwraps the gift cautiously and you can’t blame him. After all, it is from Hange. “Disinfectant and a mop?” He asks the corner of his mouth twitching in amusement.

“That’s what you spent our money on?” Mike groans. He turns to Moblit sighing. “We’ve been robbed, Moblit. Here I’d thought she’d get him something more I don’t know, manly?” Moblit just shakes his head.

“Do you like it? You’re always cleaning your office, so I figured you could use some more cleaning supplies.” Hange beams and Levi scratches the back of his neck. 

“Um thanks, Four Eyes.” He says and you chuckle at his awkwardness. 

“This is from all of us.” Eren says. “Even Jean and Mikasa.” He laughs placing a gift in front of Levi. 

Levi isn’t as slow to open it and you wonder if he’s finally getting into the celebration. His eyes widen slightly. “You got me tea.” He says. 

“The best black tea they had.” Eren chimes and Levi snorts.

“Thanks, brats.” He says eyeing the group. They smile at him though Jean and Mikasa are blushing and looking anywhere but at him.

Levi turns to Erwin. “What, no gift from you?” He asks and Erwin chuckles. 

“There’s a bottle of whiskey being sent to your office and swing by that joint you’ve been wanting to take y/n this week. I’ve made arrangements for you.” Erwin says with a smile.

Levi raises an eyebrow. 

“No need to thank me.” Erwin says. “It’s nothing really.”

You wonder what place Levi wanted to take you as everyone looks to you including Levi.

“So, what did you get him, y/n?” Hange asks and you blush realizing you’d left his present back in his office. It was a new tea set with an intricate black and gold pattern. You’d found it at the market earlier that week and had thought it would be perfect given the wear and tear of his current set as well as the fact that he was missing some of the teacups. 

“Um.” You mutter flustered by the pressure of everyone staring at you. “I-“ 

You don’t finish your sentence as Levi cups your cheek. His lips brush yours and you close your eyes as he deepens the kiss tugging on your bottom lip lightly. Warmth floods you and your stomach tightens at the sensation. He pulls away his eyes dancing as he stares at you. You blush realizing that everyone is still staring at you.

“Happy birthday, Levi.” You say awkwardly and he flashes you a crooked smile.

“Thank you.” He says brushing a piece of your hair out of your face.

“You two are adorable.” Hange sighs and Mike rolls his eyes at her before shoving her into Moblit. 

“Stop pining after something that you already have, crazy ass.” Mike says. Moblit instantly turns red and Hange glares at Mike totally oblivious to what he’s suggesting. 

“Don’t shove me, Mike or I might just feed you to one of my experiments.” She growls.

“I’d like to see you try.” Mike growls back.

“Hange.” Moblit whines but she ignores him.

Erwin watches the chaos ensue and you can hear the members of your squad chuckling to themselves.

Levi takes your hand in his and leans against you putting his head on your shoulder. “Y/n, thank you.” He says and you kiss him on the cheek.

“Happy birthday.” You say again softly though this time you’re smiling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aw, I love this so much! Let me know what you think of our grumpy Captain's birthday celebration <3


	44. Close Call, Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update! Hope you enjoy <3

Branches sway past you as you launch yourself in the air. You can see the titans from this distance, large and grotesque against the rolling green of the forest floor. 

“Ten-meter on your left!” Levi calls and your eyes dart to the target. Eren whips past you, wasting too much gas as he spirals toward the titan’s arm. 

“Eren!” Mikasa is after him in an instant. Eren leaps into the air dragging his blades along the nape, grinning ear to ear. Levi tuts to your right and you can’t help but feel dread eat away at your stomach.

Eren was being too cocky out beyond the wall and that kind of behavior usually wound up killing you.

“I got it!” He yells voice full of glee as blood turns to steam along his blades and fingers. 

“Idiot.” You hear Jean’s voice somewhere behind you and you can’t help but agree. 

“Be careful!” You yell and Eren winks at you as he pulls a flip, readjusting his trajectory to join the rest of the squad. You watch him dart among the trees and you take a deep breath trying to steady your nerves. And it almost works until Levi zips past you heading straight toward Eren.

“Eren! Move!” He yells and Eren’s eyes widen. It’s only then that you see the titan awkwardly straddling the tree to his left. Eren turns too slowly, finally realizing just how much danger he’s in. Mikasa yells his name as the titan leaps toward him jaws open. You watch horror struck as Levi slams into Eren sending him flying into the surrounding trees. Levi swings wildly on his line and the titan crashes into it sending them both sprawling towards the ground.

“Levi!” You scream propelling yourself towards them not caring how much gas you might be wasting or giving your squad any time to react.

“Y/n! Wait.” You hear Armin call behind you but you don’t listen. You speed towards Levi eyes searching below you. You spot him. He’s dangling from his line and he’s not moving. “Levi!” You yell his name and you see the titan righting itself beneath him. Beady eyes working their way to his limp form. You jet closer, your heart racing in your chest. You have to get there in time. You have to. You reach him, pulling his line free and you both tumble to the ground. You shield his body with yours, rolling into the dirt. It’s only then that you realize he’s completely unconscious, the back of his head sticky and wet. 

You scramble to your knees shaking him. “Levi, you need to get up. I need you to move.” He doesn’t and you can hear the titan approaching. You lean him against the nearest tree and turn to assess the situation. The titan is approaching and you take a deep breath, throwing one last glance at Levi as you launch yourself towards it. You can’t let it get any closer. You won’t risk it getting near him.

You tear towards it, blades at the ready and it lunges forward gaining speed. You steady your breathing, aiming for a tree to its right hoping to swing over it and take it out. Yet as you gain height it does the unexpected leaping toward you and you just barely dodge it shooting up and to its left. It follows quicker than you expected and you find yourself pulling far more evasive maneuvers than should be necessary even for an abnormal. It springs towards you again and you dodge under its outstretched arm. 

“Fuck.” You curse slamming into a branch and you plunge just within its reach. It swipes at you with fat disgusting fingers and you’re just a few feet from its gaping jaw. You can hear lines whirring and you can see your squad catching up with you but they aren’t going to make it. 

“Y/n!” You turn to see Levi rushing toward you his teeth bared. You’re glad to see him awake and moving. Relief floods you and you will yourself to breathe, to expend what little gas you have left. You hook into the titan’s cheek and jet towards its mouth and you just barely swing through its open maw before its teeth crash together behind you. You jettison to its head and watch Levi rip through its arm a vortex of blades as he spirals upward and down onto its nape. You smile glad its over but the moment passes as the titan plummets and you realize you’re completely out of gas.

“Shit.” You lose your footing and Levi’s glare finds you as he grabs you by your waist and brings you safely to a nearby tree. The moment your feet are on the ground he’s yelling.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” His eyes are narrowed and slightly out of focus, his jaw rigid as he has your wrist in a vice grip. “You could have gotten yourself killed with a fucking stunt like that.”

Armin lands on a nearby branch. “Y/n, are you okay?” 

Levi ignores him but you glance his way. “Fine, Armin.” You manage but Levi tugs your arm redirecting your attention to him. He takes a step closer and you can see the worry and anger etched into his features. 

“I’m sorry.” You place a hand over the one that’s gripping your wrist. “I was being reckless.” Some of the tension leaves his shoulders and his breathing slows a bit. “Levi, I’m sorry. But you were being reckless too. You were unconscious, what would you have me do?” His jaw twitches and you narrow your eyes at him. “And don’t you dare fucking say leave you.” He’s grinding his teeth and you stiffen. “Fuck you.” You’re shaking now, fear and exhaustion finally taking over. “You don’t get to make that call. You don’t just get to make me choose if you live or die. I will always choose to save you and you don’t get to be pissed off because of that decision because I know damn well, you’d do the fucking same.” 

“Y/n. Captain. Commander Erwin is approaching.” Armin says and Levi’s eyes dart towards Armin as Erwin and Mike land on a nearby branch. 

“Levi. We’re retreating.” Erwin looks between the two of you and to Armin’s worried expression and he frowns. “Find your horses. When we get back, I want to see both of you in my office.” 

Mike shakes his head as he looks at you two.

Levi nods and you salute. “Yes, sir.” You say and taking a deep breath you do just as he asked. Levi helps you down to the ground and once you’d found your horses, it's a long, silent, and uncomfortable ride back to the barracks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I was a little late to update! I hope you enjoyed this chapter and I'm excited for them to get in trouble with Erwin xD Let me know what you think of this chapter in the comments <3


	45. Close Call, Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, part 2. Enjoy my amazing readers <3

You reach the barracks and stable your horse. You're grateful to hand her off to a groom, when you hear yelling. You take a deep breath rounding the corner as you spot Levi and Eren facing off. Mikasa hangs back, glaring at Levi with trembling fists at her side.

“That is not fair, Captain!” Eren yells. “I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Then open your eyes, brat. You clearly have no business going out beyond the wall if you don’t understand just how much you fucked up today.” Levi growls leveling him with a look of disgust. 

You take a step closer and Mikasa’s eyes meet yours. You freeze in your tracks. Her expression is angry as she shakes her head at you.

Eren bares his teeth at Levi. “All I did was my job, Captain. We’re supposed to kill titans. I may not have seen that abnormal but that doesn’t mean I was in the wrong.”

Levi scoffs, eyes narrowing as he clenches his fists at his side. “Fucking idiot. You think you know what it means to be a part of the Survey Corps? You think keeping your head high and showing off is a part of that? Fine. Just don’t come crawling to me when you or your squad mates are blood stains on the ground.” 

“Levi!” You yell shocked and horrified that the words had even spilled out of his mouth. His eyes dart to you and he tuts before stalking off. His hair is still caked with blood and you shake your head at his retreating figure. 

You jog over to Eren who is balling his fists at his sides staring after Levi with quivering green eyes. “Eren.” You say placing a hand on his shoulder but he shrugs it off not looking you in the eye.

“Just chase after your husband, y/n and stop pitying me. I’m not Jean, I don’t need it.” He snarls and you take a step back, raising your eyebrows in shock.

“Eren!” Mikasa yells at him and you bite your lip, shaking your head at her.

“It’s okay. Eren, I’m sorry. For whatever that’s worth.” You sigh and when he doesn’t say anything you turn to leave. You have to find Levi and see just what the fuck had crawled up his ass. You had a feeling it was Erwin’s summons to his office, but that didn’t give him the right to treat Eren like shit. You worry the inside of your cheek as you stalk to your shared quarters.

When you arrive, the shower is already running and you debate whether you should change before deciding to just sit on the couch and wait. When Levi steps out of the bathroom, he walks to his desk sitting down and ruffling his hair with his towel, wincing when he touches the back of his head. Concern bubbles to the surface and you stalk across the office, removing his hand from his matted hair.

You brush the wound with your index. It’s not terribly deep but you grab the gauze from a small compartment in his desk. You dab at the wound. “You shouldn’t have gone off on Eren like that.” You say and Levi stiffens. You wrap his head and he picks at the bandage readjusting it on his forehead. He doesn’t reply and you squeeze his shoulder hoping it’ll elicit words from him. “Levi…”

“I don’t understand why you’re lecturing me, y/n. Shouldn’t your anger be directed at the one who put us in this situation?” He turns to look at you, his dark eyes narrowed as he worries his lip. “I could have died today because that idiot has no self-control. You could have died protecting me and he still thinks he’s in the right. That’s not just being reckless, y/n. That’s basically handing over our squad to be slaughtered by the titans. Or do you not remember what that feels like?”

You glare at him as you suck in a breath. “I remember, you asshole.” Anger swirls in the pit of your stomach. “Do you even hear yourself right now?” You ask and he raises an eyebrow. “Since when did you start spewing the same shit Erwin does, hm? I understand that Eren could have put us at risk but I think you tend to forget, Captain,” You growl his title. “that Eren and the rest are still kids. They are trying their best to grow up in this fucked up world and live. Sure, give Eren some time to think about what he did. Suspend him for a week, but what you said to him is uncalled for and callous. I don’t recall marrying that kind of man.”

He wrinkles his nose, dark eyes meeting your e/c ones. “They don’t have the luxury of being kids in the Survey Corps.” He says and some of the tension is gone from his muscles. “They chose this life. I think you and they tend to forget that.” He looks off towards the window, his jaw working as he grinds his teeth. 

“Levi, what’s eating you? I haven’t seen you like this in a long time.”

He sighs and you notice the circles under his eyes are darker than you remember. That weariness has crept into his features, making him look older and more forlorn. “I just don’t know if I could take another loss to our squad.” He breathes. “And I think Erwin knows that. Let alone, I know that he has some bullshit punishment waiting for the two of us.” He rubs his temples and you put your hand on his arm.

“Hey.” You say and he looks at you. “Just remember you aren’t in this alone, okay? We’ll face whatever Erwin throws at us and afterward, you need to apologize to Eren.” He rolls his eyes and you take a deep breath, flicking him in the forehead. “You will apologize, Levi. I’m not sure if you know this, but you are that boy’s idol and I won’t have a moody deflated Eren on our squad.”

He groans leaning back in his chair but his eyes have softened and he takes your hand in his kissing your fingertips. “Fine.” His eyes meet yours. “I’m sorry.”

You nod. “Now let’s go see what Commander Dipshit has in store for us.” His lips twitch into a faint smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what do you all think of Levi's little outburst? Man, I loved writing this and truly I really get where Levi is coming from. Let me know your thoughts and thanks for sticking with me and my fic. Love you all <3


	46. Close Call, Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are, with Commander Eyebrows or was it Dipshit? So many fun nicknames xD Anyway, hope you all enjoy <3

You and Levi sit across from Erwin watching him as his hand scrawls across a piece of paper, signing his name over and over again. The anticipation is killing you and Levi looks like he's just about had it as well.

"Oi, Erwin, are you going to talk to us or keeping going over your shitty paperwork?" He growls. Erwin ignores him writing another line on the paper. Levi runs a hand through his hair and you watch his thumb catch on his bandage. "Will you just fucking punish us already, you bastard?" Levi looks tired as he stares him down. 

Erwin finally puts his pen down and looks at him with calculating blue eyes. "Are you that eager to hear your sentence, Levi?"

Levi wrinkles his nose. "Better than sitting here twiddling my god damn thumbs."

You're surprised when Erwin smiles leaning back into his chair. He looks at you. "I'm surprised you aren't more talkative, y/n."

You shrug. "Is there really a point? I already know you're going to be an asshole so why dig the hole deeper?"

He laughs and looks between the two of you. "You know I didn't understand how the two of you fit together that well in the beginning. What you liked about Levi beyond his capability was beyond me. He's always been a little too rough around the edges. But that foul mouth of yours, your temper. I understand it now. You're different y/n." 

"Do you have a fucking point, Erwin? Or are you going to keep talking shit about us?" Levi sighs.

Erwin looks to him and the smile is gone. He tents his hands on his desk. "What the hell happened today? You look like shit, Levi. More than usual and remember I've seen you at some of your worst."

You worry your lip, eyes darting to Levi as he rests his head in his hand, elbow in his lap.

"What do you want me to say, Erwin? I'm tired. Too fucking tired for any of your bullshit. Do you want to hear that I fucked up and was caught by surprise by a god damn titan? That I got injured? I'm fucking tired, so much so that I was cruel to one of my squad mates, one of the men who puts their trust in me." He let's out a shaky breath and you frown. 

Erwin fixes him with sympathetic eyes. "Are you saying you want out, Levi?"

Levi flinches and sits up straight. He looks at Erwin and you can see the shock in his dark eyes. "I-"

"Answer carefully, Levi."

You watch their interaction with bated breath. Just what was Erwin getting at? Did he really think Levi would just give up everything and leave? You look at Levi, the way his jaw is working, his eyes searching Erwin's face trying to make sense of his question.

"No." Levi finally says. "That's not an option for me even if I wanted it."

Erwin's smile is back. "Are you referring to the promise you made me?"

Levi frowns. "Not just that." He starts and his eyes meet yours. "The Corps is our family. It's all we have left." 

If you weren't in front of Erwin, you would have squeezed him. You smile at him and he rolls his eyes, looking defeated.

"How can you even ask me, ask us if we want out?" 

"To be fair, I never asked y/n if she wanted to leave." Erwin says and Levi's eyes widen. Erwin smirks leaning back in his chair again. "Don't worry, Levi. Neither of you are going anywhere I hope, for a long long time."

You pinch the bridge of your nose as you stare at the man. For as long as you've known him he always played mind games and it irritated you that he was choosing now to play another one. "Erwin, will you get to the fucking point?"

He smiles at you. "Levi, y/n, you both are suspended for two weeks. Your squad will assist Hange's for the time being while you think about the consequences of your actions." He chuckles and Levi leans forward in his chair.

"You fucking bastard, did you really just drag us through your bullshit just to give us time off?" He growls, narrowing his eyes at him. "I could fucking kill you right now, you idiot."

Erwin laughs and you roll your eyes. "You're two weeks starts tomorrow. Consider it time to rest and enjoy each other's company."

You stare at him and your mind wanders to Eren and the titan earlier. "Erwin, what will our squad be doing during these two weeks?"

He raises an eyebrow. "Drills mostly. Are you worried I'll send them out beyond the wall without you?"

Levi looks at you and you frown. 

"Don't worry, y/n. I don't have any expeditions planned within that time frame." He sighs. "I swear you two. You're like cranky, doting parents to those kids."

"Excuse me?" You yelp, your cheeks tinging pink. He laughs.

"Tch." Levi tuts not looking at you or Erwin. This causes Erwin to laugh harder.

"Spend some time together. You both need this." He says finally getting his laughter under control. "And maybe, figure out just how you're going to make all of this work. I know you both struggle between your personal lives and your duty to the Corps and your squad."

"Erwin." Levi warns, glaring at him. Erwin raises his hands in the air defensively. 

"It's just a suggestion, Levi." He says smiling faintly.

"Thank you." You say and for the first time you genuinely feel grateful to the man before you. 

His eyes soften as he looks at you. "There's no need to thank me. Now go home. Both of you."

You nod rising from your chair and start for the door. Levi stands but doesn't immediately follow and you wonder just what he's thinking. You turn to him and a moment later, he walks toward you. You start the comfortable walk back to your quarters and you smile, watching Levi's relaxed posture. He tilts his head looking at you sideways.

"Why are you so giddy, brat?"

You roll your eyes taking his hand in yours. "Oh nothing. I just get to spend two weeks alone with my irritable husband." You tease and he frowns though his cheeks are red.

He links his fingers with yours and tugs you along. "Come on, brat. Let's go home."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you all think? Were you expecting Erwin to be this understanding/kind? Let me know your thoughts and again, thank you so so much for reading <3


	47. A Welcome Respite, Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are my readers, the first part of their welcome little vacation from active duty. Hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I did and the seriousness and gentleness of it all <3

You sit in the office, legs propped up on the table as you flip through a book. Your eyes don't register the words as you watch Levi at his desk twirling his pen between his fingers, a look of boredom on his face. You sigh setting the book down.

"Levi, is this really how we're going to spend our first day off?" His eyes flick to you as you furrow your eyebrows, a frown tugging at your lips.

He sets his pen down and uncrosses his legs. "Do you have something in mind?" He arches an eyebrow as if challenging you.

You stick your tongue out at him and he snorts. "Actually I do. Why don't we go on a picnic."

"Picnic?" His eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

"Yeah, you know, like when you go out somewhere and eat food on a blanket." You smirk.

He rolls his eyes. "I know what a picnic is y/n."

You can't help but smile at him. He's adorable when he's aggravated. "Then let's go on one."

He sighs, getting up from his chair and stretching. You admire how his muscles ripple beneath his shirt as he rolls his shoulders. "Fine."

You jump up from the couch and his eyes widen in surprise. "Yes! Okay, well all we need is a basket of food and a blanket. Oh, I think we have a blanket somewhere around here." You pass him as you walk to the closet in search of one. 

"I'll go get some food." He calls. "You go get the blanket and change. Get more comfortable." You look over your shoulder to see him eyeing you with a slight shake of his head. "Something other than your uniform." You look down at your clothes and smile bashfully. You'd put it on on impulse when you'd woken up. To be fair, it was like your second skin at this point and was fairly comfortable without the harness and jacket. "Meet me outside the barracks when you're ready."

"Alright, alright. I'll change." You say and he nods before leaving for the mess hall. You sigh, finally making it to the closet. You can just make out the corner of a blanket on the top shelf and you stand on your tip toes to reach it. Once secured, you throw it on to the bed and shuffle through your clothes. You frown at your selection. You'd worn all of them a million times. Sighing, you dig through the dresser drawer and are surprised when you find a dress that you haven't seen in months. It's black and reaches your knees. The shoulders are lace, the arms puffy, and silver buttons wink at you across its chest as you eye it. Sasha had gotten the dress for you months ago and having little time to actually go out, you'd tucked it away. You grab a simple pair of grey leggings to match. Shrugging off your clothes, you quickly get dressed and tug on your boots. You grab the blanket and go to check yourself in the mirror. Raking your hair into a messy ponytail, you tuck your stray hairs behind your ears before nodding at yourself in the mirror. Smiling, you head out to meet him blanket in tow. When you reach your meeting spot, you're surprised to find he isn't there yet. "Where are you?" You ask pouting slightly.

"Looking for someone?" You hear his husky voice off to your side and are greeted by his playful smirk.

You feign confusion, putting a finger to your lips in thought. "I was looking for my irritable husband." You say and he snorts putting his hand on your waist. You note that he holds a cloth bundle over his shoulder haphazardly and you smile at the fact that he couldn't find a basket. 

His eyes roam your body and he tugs lightly at the hem of your dress, his eyes darker, more seductive. He pulls you close wrapping his arms around you. "Funny, I was looking for my pain in the ass wife."

You giggle your face flushing. "Haven't seen her." You say smiling up at him. 

He raises an eyebrow and sighs. "A shame." He grabs your hand in his and pulls you along, throwing you a crooked smile over his shoulder. "You look good by the way."

You blush, rocking on your heels before following. "Why, thank you." You peck him on the cheek . "You look quite handsome yourself." 

He shakes his head, his hair falling in his eyes. "Come on."

You'd found a spot just outside of the town under an oak tree. The ground is dappled with light as you lay out your blanket. Levi seems a little weary to be sitting on the ground, making sure he's well within the middle of the blanket before he gets comfortable. You take a seat and he sets the cloth bundle between you two. The breeze blows through the trees and you smile as it tousles his hair. 

"I suppose this isn't too bad." He admits, his eyes flicking to you and he raises an eyebrow when he catches you staring at him. "What?"

"Nothing." You smile crossing your legs in front of you. His thumb brushes the back of your hand and you can feel your heart beating faster in your chest. His eyes search your face before wandering to your shoulders, your chest, and then finally down the length of your legs. You know the tips of your ears are red under his gaze as his thumb brushes against your hand once more. 

His eyes finally stray back to your face and he takes a deep breath. "Hungry?"

"What?" You yelp swallowing the lump in your throat. He chuckles, eyebrows scrunched together as he reaches for the bundle untying it. You'd never been more jealous of an inanimate object in your life. 

He unfolds the cloth and your immediately intrigued by the paper box at its center. "That isn't from the mess hall." 

He smiles. "No, it isn't."

You lean closer, your lips pursed as you reach for the box. Levi swats your hand away and you pout.

"You'll make a mess of it." He says, opening it gingerly. 

You raise your eyebrows surprised at what you see. "Cake?"

Levi nods the corners of lips twitching. "You were eyeing it last time on our way to the tea house."

You grin. "The one with the strawberries?" You wriggle in place as you stare at it in anticipation. The strawberries are plump and red against the puffy whipped topping.

"You're drooling." He smirks and you fix him with a hurt look.

"Am not."

He chuckles handing you a fork. You take it and he nods towards it, smiling. "Go ahead."

You scrunch your nose in excitement. The gesture alone is sweet and you're sure he spent a small fortune given the fact that it had strawberries in it. You spear the cake, taking a small piece and leaning towards him. You offer it to him, blushing slightly. "You first." He stares at the cake, an eyebrow raised before he obliges. The cake disappears in his mouth and the tips of his ears are red as he chews. "Good?" 

He swallows and nods. "Try it for yourself." He mutters not looking at you. You can't help but smile at his awkwardness. 

You take another forkful and bring it to your mouth. You close your eyes savoring the sweetness. He grasps your hand in his and you open your eyes. He's looking at you, eyes narrowed. They're the color of the sky at dusk and they dance as he stares at you. You worry your lip as he scoots closer. His hand goes to your cheek and he runs his index along your lower lip. It's only then that you notice the icing on his fingertip and you flush red. He chuckles and you're surprised when he wipes it on the blanket. His eyes don't leave yours and his fingers trace the curve of your cheek and jaw. You shiver under his touch and he smiles leaning in. He kisses you on your forehead and he wrinkles his nose at you playfully.

"Levi." You pout your heart hammering away in your chest. 

His eyes flick to your lips momentarily. "Yes?" The smirk is back and you scrunch your eyebrows together.

"You're such a tease."

"Am I?" He hovers closer before he captures your lips with his. His hand cups your cheek and you melt beneath his touch. He pulls you closer deepening the kiss. He tugs at your bottom lip begging you for more. You sigh and his tongue slips into your mouth. His kiss is needy but gentle as his hand falls to your shoulder and he eases you down onto the blanket. The ground is cool against your back, his body warm against yours. You gasp as he tugs on your lip again. 

"Levi." You breathe and he pulls away only to kiss your jaw, leaving a trail of kisses down to your collar bone. You close your eyes to the sensation of his lips. "Levi." You say again trying to reel yourself back to a place of decency. Your eyes flutter open and he's staring at you, fingers running through your hair as he pulls it loose from your hair band. Your breath catches as you look at him. His midnight hair spilling over his eager eyes. Your stomach flutters nervously under his gaze and you wish you were back in your quarters away from prying eyes. You frown tugging gently on a piece of his hair. 

He runs his fingers through your hair as he watches you. "What are you thinking right now?"

You blush looking him in the eye. "That its completely indecent for you to be on top of me out in public, and that a part of me doesn't want you to stop any of this."

He smirks pecking you on the cheek. "Funny how things change." He says rolling off of you onto his side. He props his head up with his hand.

"What are you implying?" You glare at him and he laughs.

"Just that you didn't seem to care during our sparring matches not too long ago."

"That was a long time ago and it was different." 

"Was it?"

You punch him in the arm and he snorts. "For one, we or rather I had no clue that I was even into you. You were just some annoying asshole back then."

"And here I thought you'd spare my feelings, y/n." He chuckles and you refrain yourself from punching him again. He plays with a strand of your hair, his expression thoughtful. "Of course, Erwin ruined our fun that time around." 

"Levi." Your face is twice as red now. "Dear god, stop talking."

"Why? Are you embarrassed? You seemed rather proud of yourself."

"Levi Ackerman, I swear to god." He smirks and you shove him, he grabs your wrist pulling you with him as he falls onto his back. He wraps you in his arms staring at you with playful eyes. "You're an ass, you know that?" You grumble and he kisses you on the forehead as you rest your head on his chest.

"As long as I'm yours, that's all I care about." He strokes your hair. You roll your eyes at him but smile. "Y/n." His expression is serious now. 

"Hm?"

"Do you ever want more than this?" His voice is soft and you look up at him to see him worrying his lip.

"What do you mean?"

He sighs. "I don't know. That bastard just has me thinking too damn much." You realize that he's talking about Erwin.

You readjust yourself so you can look at him better. He looks worried, even a little melancholy. You cup his cheek with your hand. "Levi?"

He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. "I don't know, sometimes I just feel like I'm not enough for you. I'm always busy with my work and god knows our missions never go the way I think they will." He exhales loudly shaking his head. "That's not what I mean, I'm not trying to say that I think you don't love me. Fuck, I sound like a dumbass."

You raise an eyebrow at him as he runs a hand through his hair with his free hand. "Levi, slow down. I'm not sure I understand what you're trying to say, but I knew what I signed up for when we decided to be together. You're the god damn Captain of the Survey Corps, you're important. I knew that from the start. As for missions, as long as we all make it home alive, I can deal with the stress."

He groans throwing his head back on the blanket. "That's not what I mean."

"Than what do you mean?" Irritation bleeds into your voice and you immediately feel bad for it. 

He covers his face with his hand. "What that asshole said about our squad and how we are around them."

You stare at him eyebrows furrowed. Just what the hell was he getting at? You try to remember what Erwin said exactly about your squad.

"That we're like cranky, doting parents to them?" It hits you and you bite your lip as you notice the tips of his ears are red. "Oh. Dear lord, is that what he meant by us sorting out our personal lives?" He gives you an awkward smile but he's having trouble looking you in the eye. "Levi, it's our first day off and this is where you steer our conversation?"

He groans, rubbing his temples. "I'm sorry. I can't get that idiot's words out of my head. For fuck's sake, I wasn't even able to sleep last night because I couldn't get out of my head."

You grab his hand, worrying the inside of your cheek. "What are your thoughts?"

He sighs and finally looks you in the eye. "I don't know. I never really thought about it much. I had a shit childhood. I grew up in the damn Underground for fuck's sake, and until recently, I didn't even think I'd be thinking about this. About kids." He says the word softly like saying it loud makes it somehow more real and scary. You suppose he wasn't far off as the prospect terrifies you too. 

You sigh, resting your head on his chest again. "I'm not even sure how that would work with us both constantly going on missions, let alone being nearly killed by titans on a regular basis. Is that really something we would want to put a kid through?"

"We could make it work, if that's what you want." You tip your head back so you can see him and your heart swells at the sincerity playing across his features. You search his face and you can see it. Him being a father. He'd be overprotective and stern, but loving nonetheless. You picture a little version of him running around tracking mud across your quarters, Levi chasing after him angry at the mess he's making and your heart warms. "Y/n?"

You smile at him. "I don't know." There's a hint of sadness in your voice and he catches it, wrapping his arms around you. "I just don't know if that's in the cards for us."

"Fuck the cards. When have we ever let anyone dictate our lives?" He kisses the top of your head. "Besides it's whatever makes you happy."

"Us happy." You correct him. "And I am happy, Levi." You sigh. "Can you just give me some time to think about it? Of course, you think about it too. This isn't just my choice."

He nods.

"For now, can you just hold me?" You ask and he cradles you in his strong, warm arms.

"Anything for you." He breathes and you close your eyes and just listen to rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you all think? My heart is so full as I wrote this. Let me know your thoughts and I hope you're looking forward to so many more sweet moments between these two <3


	48. A Welcome Respite, Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy this chapter <3

You both take your breakfast in the mess hall. Your squad surrounds you and you fidget uncomfortably in the silence. They're ignoring the pair of you. 

Sasha is leaning on Connie as she finishes her food, giving you a timid smile, while Armin and Mikasa stare at their food clearly avoiding Levi. Eren is sulking at the end of the table, fists clenched in his lap. 

"Glad you chose to have breakfast with us." Jean says breaking the silence. He wrinkles his nose at you and smirks. "We were starting to miss your sarcastic ass." You smile in relief. "I'd take you and the Captain any day over that crazy lady." He shakes his head, his fawn eyes narrowing as he stares into his cup. Levi frowns at him but he ignores the grumpy Captain. "You should see the way she has Moblit and her squad running around doing her bidding. It's insane, right Armin?" He turns to look at him.

The blonde boy ducks his head before looking at you with a faint smile. It doesn't quite reach his eyes. 'Squad Leader Hange can be a bit much." 

Eren's eyes dart toward the two of you finally and you elbow Levi. He flinches, his cup of tea halfway to his lips. You motion towards Eren and his frown deepens as he sets his cup down.

He grinds his teeth and you roll your eyes at how difficult he's being. "Oi, Eren."

Eren's eyes dart to Levi, his eyebrows knitted together in anger. You hold your breath, hoping that he doesn't lash out. Knowing Levi, if Eren did, apologizing would be the last thing on his mind.

Levi fidgets next to you, his finger gliding along the handle of his cup. "How do you feel about sparring?"

Eren raises his eyebrows at him and the whole squad looks to Levi surprised. You can't blame them. You weren't expecting the words to come out of his mouth either. You'd expected him to say he was sorry, not offer to fight him. 

Eren nods with determined eyes as Levi picks up his tea and takes a sip. "When you're done?"

Eren rises from his seat. "I'm ready now."

Levi nods setting down his cup and standing. You watch as the two walk towards the exit.

"Well fuck, this ought to be interesting." Jean says as you all rise from the table to follow. You sigh heavily as you walk and Sasha pats you on the shoulder reassuringly. 

Eren and Levi face off. Eren holds his fists close to his center, feet apart while Levi just stands there, muscles relaxed as he watches him. You can tell Eren's temper is getting the best of him. He can't keep still and he launches himself at Levi without even assessing his body language. Eren throws a punch and Levi catches it, twisting his wrist. 

"Bastard!" Eren yells rearing back his other arm and you wince as his fist connects with Levi's jaw. Levi's eyes narrow and he releases Eren's arm, throwing him off balance. Eren's eyes widen as Levi pivots, swinging his leg so his boot connects with Eren's face. Eren flies backward rolling onto the ground. 

"Levi!" You yell your voice sticking in your throat as you try to berate him. He doesn't acknowledge you as he takes a step toward Eren who's crouched on the ground, hand covering his bleeding nose. 

"Get up, Eren." Levi's voice is silent, deadly and you wonder why he's being like this. You had expected him to at least let Eren win. 

Eren staggers to his feet, wiping his nose with the back of his hand. He glares at Levi before charging him again. He aims for his shoulder and Levi steps out of the way at the last moment, kicking him in the back of the shin. Eren sprawls into the dirt cursing under his breath.

Levi turns toward him leveling him with hard slate eyes. "Get up."

Eren pushes himself up. "Fuck you!" He growls shooting to his feet. He bares his teeth as he throws another punch. Levi sighs kicking his legs out from underneath him.

Eren lays on his back, angry tears beading at the corners of his eyes as he glowers at him. 

Levi squats next to him. "Are you really just going to let me kick the shit out of you, or are you going to put up a fight?" 

"Ah!" Eren yells and you can hear the anger and desperation in his cry. He strikes upwards and Levi catches his arm by the elbow, glaring down at him. Eren's breath is ragged as he throws another punch with his free hand and this time it hits his mark, Levi's face, and you flinch at the sickening thud. 

Levi's head hangs low, his hair in his eyes. He smirks lifting Eren to his feet as he stands. "Good." His fingers brush along his cheek where he'd just been hit and he rolls his shoulders. "Now again."

Eren charges toward him and you watch the two of them in wonder. Leave it to Levi, to solve a problem with violence. You sigh as you watch Levi dodge another punch, landing one of his own knocking the breath out of Eren. It doesn't keep him from fighting though as he catches Levi in the shoulder causing him to stagger backwards. It goes on like that for what seems like forever. The two dancing around one another, landing blow after blow on the other. 

Both are standing a few feet apart now. Eren's breathing heavily and strings of Levi's hair are sticking to his forehead as he tries to calm his own irregular breathing. Eren circles Levi, and you bite your lip. 

"Can't they just call it a draw already." You nearly whisper and Armin and Jean look at you. 

Jean chuckles putting his hands on his hips as he assesses the two of them. "You wouldn't understand y/n." He smiles as he watches Eren pick himself up off the ground again. "There's just something about fighting to get your point across that makes you a little stupid and not want to quit." He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly and you think back to all the times you'd seen Jean and Eren at each other's throats. Was this the same? 

Your eyes wander back to Levi and Eren. Levi hits him with another kick, this time to his chest and Eren falls hard on his ass. You expect him to be angry, but as he lifts himself up to a sitting position there's a smile on his face as he looks at Levi. You raise an eyebrow as laughter bubbles over Eren's lips. Your eyes dart to Levi and you're surprised to see the gentleness in his eyes as he helps the boy up once more. 

Eren's on his feet dusting himself off, staring at Levi. "I'm sorry, Captain. Seems you were right. I was cocky." 

A hint of a smile plays on Levi's lips as he puts a hand on his shoulder. Your heart warms as you stare at the two. The way Eren's green eyes glimmer with admiration despite the fact that he was bruised and bloody. You smile as Levi squeezes his shoulder before walking toward you. His expression is soft as he stops in front of you and the rest of the squad. "How about I treat you all to some tea?" He asks, and the tension melts around you. 

"Can we get food, too?" Sasha pipes up and Levi's eyebrows scrunch together as he gives her an exasperated look. 

"Sash." Connie hisses. 

"What? I want to take advantage of his generosity. It's not everyday the Captain is offering to take us all out." She fixes Levi with a pointed look and he sighs, clearly caving. 

"Fine. Just this once." His eyes dart to you and you smile taking his hand in yours. You give it a gentle squeeze before you all turn to start the short walk to the tea house. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing like a spar to clear the tension, am I right? I love how Eren and Levi think honestly, and I really enjoyed writing this chapter because I think that they both really are better at discerning things this way rather than with words. After all, they both are men of action lol. 
> 
> Let me know your thoughts and thank you all for continuing to read my work. Love you guys <3


	49. A Welcome Respite, Part 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy some of their time relaxing with the squad <3

“Sasha!” Connie yelps as she stuffs her face with almond cookies that you’d found on the way and chases it down with a long swig of tea. She grimaces staring into her cup before grabbing another cookie. Connie grabs her hand, trying to pry it free. “Those are for all of us.”

Jean’s eyebrows are knitted together as he stares at the two. “Connie, you’re fighting a losing battle.”

Connie ignores Jean as Sasha breaks the cookie in half and scarfs it down.

“Oi, would you stop making so much damn noise.” Levi growls, throwing them a glare. 

You chuckle into your cup of tea as Armin looks around the room. 

“Captain Levi has a point. People are staring, guys.” Armin’s blue eyes dart back to Sasha.

“And we aren’t even supposed to bring food in here anyway.” Mikasa adds with a sigh.

You look around the room. It seems everyone is staring, but you soon realize it’s not just because of Sasha’s antics. A couple at a table in the corner keep eyeing Eren and Levi. You look back at them, confirming your suspicions. They look like a damn mess. Eren has dried blood etched onto the back of his hand and chin. Levi looks rumpled and more prickly than normal, especially with the rose-colored bruises blossoming across his jaw and cheek. You laugh softly, they’re the perfect poster boys for the Survey Corps.

“Something funny?” Levi’s low voice catches your attention and you smile. 

“Oh, nothing. Just that people are staring at you and Eren.” You chime and Levi raises an eyebrow as he takes a sip of his tea.

“They are?” You hear Eren yelp, he’s managed to steal one of the cookies from Sasha and its hovering inches from his mouth.

You snort. “Yep.”

“Who cares.” Levi sets his cup down, tilting his head as he looks at you. “We’re the only reason half of these people are safe and able to live what they consider to be normal lives.”

You roll your eyes at him, something snide about to fall off your tongue when you hear something crash. Your head whips to the end of the table.

“Sash! Watch what the hell you’re doing.” Connie yells and its only then that you see the smashed teacup on the floor, tea oozing out from its cracked remains.

A chair groans across the wood floor and your eyes dart to Levi as he stands. He stalks to the end of the table, grabbing Sasha by the collar of her shirt. You stand, the whole tea house is staring now.

Sasha struggles against Levi’s grip, thrashing wildly as she kicks over her chair. Your squad watches in horror as Levi glares down at her, his mouth twisted into a scowl. He drags her to the door and she grabs onto the frame for dear life. It’s then you realize she still has a cookie in her mouth and you sigh heavily. 

You make your way around the table. The owner of the tea house, Magdalene, looks at you and you throw her an apologetic smile before turning to Armin. “Armin, can you help clean that up?”

He nods and you walk to the door. Sasha’s dark eyes search your face as you force the cookie into her mouth and start working her fingers free. You’re finally able to peel them away and Levi drags her the remainder of the way out and down the street a bit where he deposits her roughly onto her ass. She finishes chewing as she stares up at the two of you.

“God damn it, Blouse.” Levi growls, and you put a hand on his shoulder to stop him. He looks at you sideways as you pass him crouching down next to Sasha. 

You pinch her cheek, frowning at her as her eyes widen. “Sasha, you really need to be more aware of what you’re doing.” You begin. “Levi was nice enough to buy a treat for everyone and here you are hoarding it and making a scene.”

“Tch.” You hear Levi tut and you roll your eyes. You’re sure he’s not happy with the way you’re berating her but you don’t care. It’s better than having him kick some sense into her, which unfortunately had happened before and wasn’t terribly effective.

She pouts as she stares at you. “Now, you’re going to go back inside and apologize to not only our squad, but to the owner of the tea shop. Do you understand?”

“It’s Connie’s fault.” She grumbles and you sigh. 

“Sasha, are you really going to throw the blame on your boyfriend right now?” You raise an eyebrow at her and she blushes. You groan. “Fine. I’ll give you my share of the cookies if you do what I ask.” 

Her eyes light up as she stands and dusts herself off. She nearly skips to the door and you turn to look after her. 

Levi flicks your ear and you hiss. “What the hell?”

“She makes a scene and interrupts my tea, and you agree to give her your share of the cookies. Are you insane, brat?”

You rub your ear, smiling at him. “Nope.” You chime as you head back to the tea house. Levi shakes his head and follows.

Sasha’s halfway through her apology when you both take your seats. Things seem to have calmed down as more tea is served to each of you. You look up at Magdalene with a grin. “Sorry for, well, everything.” 

She waves it off with a smile before returning behind the counter.

“Y/n.” Sasha says and you tilt your head to look at her. “I did what you asked.”

You smile at her procuring the two cookies that would have been yours. She ogles them, almost drooling. Your eyes dart to Levi and you toss one to him. He catches it gracefully, eyebrows raised. You motion to your mouth and he scrunches his eyebrows together in understanding, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips. 

“Hey!” Sasha yelps as you and Levi finish off your share. 

You smirk at her. “Maybe next time you’ll think before you make a scene like that.”

Connie laughs and she punches him in the shoulder. “Whose side are you on?” Sasha grumbles and he rubs the back of his neck, wrapping his other arm around her.

You look across the table to Levi. His grey eyes meet yours and you can’t help but smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ha! I love this chapter and Levi and Reader's interactions with the squad. Let me know your thoughts, and thank you so so much for reading <3


	50. A Welcome Respite, Part 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are my readers. Another update! Sorry for the wait, and I hope you enjoy <3

It's morning, the sun is peeking above Wall Rose casting the office a gentle shade of pink. You smile, dragging your cleaning rag along the bookshelf trying to tidy up per Levi's request. You knew he hated when things were a mess so you took extra care to sweep the corners and the spines of the books for dust. You stretch, trying to reach the top of the bookshelf and nearly tumble, hitting the side of your head against the hard wood. 

"Shit." You growl rubbing your head.

Levi chuckles behind you and you whirl to face him. His arm is draped over the back of the couch, reports in his other hand, while he looks at you. 

"Something funny?" You growl readjusting the handkerchief you'd tied around your forehead to keep dust from collecting in your hair. 

He smirks. "Nothing, just enjoying the view." 

You glare at him. "Enjoy this, you ass." You flip him off and he laughs. You sigh, resting your arm at your hip. "Are you going to help me, or am I going to have to clean the whole damn place to your standards alone?" He narrows his eyes, waving the papers casually. You groan. "Erwin said this is our time off, I don't understand why the hell he's sending you reports to look over."

Levi shrugs. "Someone has to look over them."

"Then get Hange to do it. She's always bitching how she wants Erwin to take her more seriously."

Levi looks horrified as he stares at you. "Y/n, have you ever seen Four Eyes do paperwork?"

You frown. "I suppose I haven't."

He sighs deeply. "Be glad, it's a shit show. I pity Moblit, honestly."

"Wait, you're telling me she pawns all of her work off on him?" 

He nods.

"Well fuck, that's a little one sided of her."

"You're telling me." He shakes his head. 

You let out a breath and walk to the couch. Levi follows you with his eyes. You take a seat dropping the rag on the floor which gets you a sour look from him. "Don't worry, I won't leave it there. I need a break."

He raises an eyebrow. "You've barely started."

You scrunch your nose at him and he rolls his eyes. "Lazy ass." He mutters. 

"Excuse me? Lazy? We're supposed to be relaxing!" You snatch the papers from his hand, pivoting so they're just out of reach.

"Oi." He growls, grabbing your wrist. His face is inches from yours and you take the opportunity to glare at him. His eyes meet yours and he does the same, but his grip loosens.

He sighs as you set the papers on the table. Wrapping his arms around you, he pulls you closer. "Fine. You win. I'll help." He kisses you playfully on the ear. "Besides I'd probably have to redo your cleaning anyway." He kisses your shoulder and you narrow your eyes at him. 

"Ass."

He chuckles, rising to his feet. You follow and your lips pull into a smile as he wraps a spare handkerchief around his forehead. You try not to laugh. It's adorable and dorky, and it makes you love him even more as he levels you with a glare. You pick up the rag you'd dropped and start working on the shelves that line the wall. Levi had grabbed a rag of his own and you can hear him dragging it across the window, the smell of lemons reaching your nose. You sigh contentedly. It reminded you of the first few times you'd come to his office. The days where you'd cleaned while he poured over his reports. You held those days close to your heart. The days you'd found out that he wasn't just a sarcastic asshole, but rather a sweet and compassionate man trying to hide his hurt behind those cold eyes and his deep frown. Your eyes linger on the pictures of your old squads and you stop cleaning. 

"Hey Levi." You say though you don't look at him. 

"Yeah?"

"What do you think about getting a picture of all of us for the shelf?" You stare at the picture of your brother and smile sadly. Your current squad was as much your family now as Squad Byron had been. You wanted to commemorate that. That they held a special place in your heart. And you knew they did for Levi too, even if they annoyed him on a daily basis.

He sighs. "If that's what you want. Though it'll be a pain in the ass to get everyone together."

You turn to look at him. He's staring at you, his dark eyes thoughtful. "What?" You ask and he shakes his head, returning to cleaning the windows. You watch him for a moment. The way the peaks of his shoulders roll beneath the fabric of his shirt, the way his hair falls away from his face as he concentrates on his work showing off Eren's handiwork. You're glad to see that the bruise is only a faint shade of purple. 

"Just what are you thinking Levi?" You weren't even aware the words had tumbled over your lips until he looked at you. He raises an eyebrow and you blush. "Forget it." You squeak turning back to the shelf slightly embarrassed. 

"Brat, you okay?" His voice is closer and his calloused fingers curl around your arm as he forces you to turn and look at him. "Did that blow you took to the bookshelf scramble your brain, or something?"

You roll your eyes. "Really?"

He laughs though it doesn't quite reach his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know." You say honestly. You wonder if its the nostalgia of cleaning the office, or looking at the pictures of your old squads, but you feel a little bit of sadness eating at you. And you swear you can see it in Levi's features too. Was this just the result of all your years in the Survey Corps? The heaviness that you seemed to live and breath. It was smothering. 

You take a shaky breath and really look at him. It's been a little over two years since you'd met him. One since you'd gotten married, and truly he is the happiest part of your life. The constant. Full of warmth and love. You take his hand and pull him into a hug. 

"Y/n?"

"I love you." You whisper. You run your fingers through the bristled hairs of his undercut grateful for his warmth. For him. 

"I love you too." He wraps his arms around you but his voice sounds worried. He pushes you an arms length away. Searching your face, he cups your cheek with his hand. "Tell me what's wrong."

"Can we go for a walk or something? I'm just not feeling well, I guess." 

He worries his lip and nods. He pulls the handkerchief from his hair before undoing yours and he throws them onto the table. "Of course. Anywhere in mind?" You shrug as he takes your hand.

The streets are relatively quiet as you walk them and you're grateful for the breath of fresh air. Though Levi keeps stealing glances at you, his expression worried. You feel awful for it, but you needed to get away from it all. The barracks. His office. It was just a little overwhelming all of a sudden. He tugs your arm slightly and you look at him.

"Hm?" You hum, and he gives you a hint of a smile.

"Stay here. I'll be right back." He squeezes your hand before walking away and you watch him momentarily before you assess the street around you. It's a sunny day though the breeze keeps away the biting heat. People mill to and fro and for once you envy the simplicity of their lives. The ability to come and go as they liked. To own little homes and not have to follow orders. To be safe among those they loved. You sigh, since when did you start getting so damned sentimental?

You're ripped from your thoughts as something collides with you. You look down and are genuinely surprised by the boy at your feet. He barely looks older than seven. He looks up at you frowning, as he rubs his head. "Ouch. That hurt." He pouts, glaring up at you. "You should watch where you're going."

You raise an eyebrow. Was this kid serious? You hadn't moved, perfectly still as this boy had plowed into you and yet he had the audacity to say it was your fault? "I think you ran into me, kid." You grumble though upon closer inspection, you feel a little sorry for him. His expression changes to one of confusion and his eyes dart around as if searching for something. "You lost or something?"

"I'm not lost." He grumbles though he keeps searching the surrounding area.

You sigh. "Kid-"

"My name isn't kid, it's Seth."

"Okay, Seth. Do you need help with something?"

He wiggles his eyebrows trying to contemplate if he can trust you probably. He sighs kicking you in the leg. You frown, trying not to lose it on the kid.

"I'm looking for my dad." He admits. 

"Okay, what does he look like? Maybe I've seen him."

"He's really tall." He begins and you internally sigh, to this kid anyone could be tall. "He's got reddish brown hair and a ton of freckles."

You nod. Brown and freckles. You scan the crowd and unfortunately don't see anyone fitting his description. "Do you know where you were headed before you got lost?" 

Seth bites his lip and nods. "The Tea house."

"Dear lord, why didn't you say that sooner." You grab the boy's hand in yours and he blushes. You try not to roll your eyes as you half drag him with you. 

"Y/n." You hear Levi behind you. You turn to face him and Seth hides behind your leg, glaring at him. "What the hell are you doing with that brat?"

"None of your business, you grumpy old tree." Seth sticks his tongue out and you swear you can see Levi's eyebrow twitching. He chooses to ignore the boy and looks at you eyebrows raised.

You sigh. "He's lost. His dad was taking him to the tea house."

Levi sighs. "I swear I can't leave you alone for even a second." He looks down at the boy with narrowed eyes. 

"You're scary." Seth grumbles and Levi frowns. 

"Let's go." He starts toward the tea house without another word and you sigh. This kid was something else. You follow, Seth's hand clenched in yours.

"Is he your boyfriend?" The boy asks looking up at you with curious eyes. 

"Husband actually." You chime, smiling as you see Levi roll his shoulders uncomfortably.

"You married him? You seem too nice for someone as scary as him."

You try not to smile. "He's not as scary as he looks."

The boy's eyes dart to Levi and he cocks his head. "Really?"

"Really." You confirm and Levi looks back at the two of you. You expect him to be grumpy but the corners of his mouth are twitching into a faint smile.

"Hey brat." He looks down at Seth. "Come here."

Seth looks up at you for reassurance and you nod. He shuffles toward Levi hesitantly and you follow. It's then you realize that Levi had stopped at one of the stands serving all kinds of confections. 

He motions toward the stand. "Pick something." 

Seth's eyes light up briefly before he levels Levi with a glare. "You can't buy me candy and think I'll like you."

Levi shrugs. "Think what you want. This is my last offer."

Seth's eyes widen and he looks at the stall. His eyes dart between different treats before he points at a small box of ginger candy. 

"I'll take those." Levi says to the shopkeeper and he quickly pays for them, handing the kid the box. 

Seth doesn't seem to know what to say as he looks down at the candy.

"It's fine. You don't have to say thank you." Levi puts his hands in his pockets and turns to keep walking.

"I wasn't going to." Seth says and he's blushing. 

You stifle a laugh as you put a hand on his shoulder. "Come on." You finally reach the Tea House and as you reach the door, a man with enough freckles that the sky would be jealous, runs toward you. 

"Seth!" His eyes are relieved as he takes in his son. He scoops him into his arms and Seth loops his arms around his neck. 

"Dad!"

His father takes in you and Levi and he smiles bashfully. "I guess I have you two to thank for taking care of and finding my son?"

You nod and Levi fixes him with narrowed eyes. "You should keep a better eye on him."

You throw Levi a pointed look. He's being too harsh.

Seth sticks his tongue out at him and Levi sighs. 

"You're right." The man says rubbing the back of his neck. "His mother would kill me if she knew I lost him. But thank you. I really appreciate all you've done. Is there anything I can do to repay you?"

You put your hands up about to wave him off, when Levi speaks. "Just keep him safe." Levi says and you look at him. The way he's looking at the kid, like he's something precious despite his surly attitude. It makes your heart melt.

He turns to leave and you bid the two farewell before following. The man calls after you both. "Hey, what are your names?"

"Y/n and Levi." You call back and his eyes widen.

"Levi?" You hear him utter in wonder. You're sure he knows exactly who he is at this point and you roll your eyes, a smile on your lips. 

Levi takes your hand in his and tugs you along. "Why is it you get in all kinds of trouble when I'm not around, brat?" He looks at you sideways and your heart flutters.

"You know me." You chime, throwing him your best smile. He rolls his eyes before pulling you off the path and toward a small stand of trees. You nearly trip and he sighs.

"Do I have to carry you?"

"Nope, that won't be necessary." You blush remembering the time he'd carried you all the way back to barracks in the rain. It had been embarrassing.

He smiles before turning to you. His eyes are dancing, much happier than they were earlier. He strokes your cheek. "You seem to be feeling better. I'm glad."

"I do feel better." You're genuinely surprised by your change in mood. 

Levi sighs. "Then I guess buying this was worthless." He pulls something out of his pocket.

You follow his gaze and see the slightly rumpled white flower in his palm. It's beautiful. The petals remind you of fresh snow, white with hints of pale blue. You smile. "Is this what you were doing when you told me to wait?"

He shrugs but he's smiling. "I wanted to cheer you up." 

You kiss him on the cheek. "Levi." 

His eyes are soft and loving as he tucks the flower behind your ear. "There." His voice is low.

You finger the flower, blushing as his eyes search your face. "Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me."

You grab his hand in yours, brushing the back of it with your thumb. "You're full of surprises today."

His forehead wrinkles as he stares at you. "What does that mean?"

"It means you're being nice. You even bought that kid candy. I wasn't expecting that especially since he called you a grumpy old tree."

He blushes, his mouth twisting into a frown. "I can be nice."

You smile at him. "You can be." You giggle and he pulls you closer.

"Shut up, brat." He kisses you. His lips are warm and soft against yours. He cups your cheek and you feel your heart fluttering against your rib cage. You pull away, cupping his cheeks in your hands, your thumbs brushing along his warm skin. He stares at you, dark eyes like liquid silver. 

"God, I love you." So much that it hurts, you think. You put your forehead to his and he wraps you in his arms. 

"What's with all the proclamations of love today?" He whispers into your hair. 

You sigh. "I don't know. I just guess somewhere along the way, I just wish we could be just us."

He kisses your cheek and neck. "Y/n." Your name falls off his lips and you take a deep breath. "We can be. We are."

"I'm not so sure."

He grabs your chin between his thumb and index forcing you to look at him. He kisses you roughly, his tongue dancing with yours. Your stomach works itself into knots, your body flowing with warmth. He retreats, looking at you with determined eyes. "You're my wife, or did you forget, Y/n Ackerman?" His smile is teasing. "And I'd do god damn near anything to make you smile. To keep you safe." He kisses you again lighter this time. You gasp as his fingers run through your hair. You clutch his collar, holding onto him for dear life. He retreats once more and he runs a finger along your jaw. "Now stop worrying about things we can't change. Be with me. Here. Now. While we aren't out beyond the wall. While the whole damn world isn't crumbling around us." His eyes are fire: warm and inviting. No, pleading you to let go. 

You take a shaky breath. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I got so wrapped up in my head."

He smiles and your heart melts. "It's okay."

You kiss him and your troubles drift away. Just what the hell had you been worried about? You had him. Strong and warm and kind beneath your fingertips. Your husband. The man you loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not going to lie, I struggled a bit with this chapter. I really wanted Reader to have doubts especially now that they have time off. Not sure if I was able to write that successfully, but hey not every chapter can be perfect. 
> 
> Regardless, I hope you enjoyed it and let me know your thoughts <3


	51. A Welcome Respite, Part 5 (Drunk and In Love)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you are my readers. Another sweet chapter. Hope you enjoy and sorry for the late update <3

The mess hall is loud, filled to the brim with laughter and voices. It's dark through the pane glass window and at the table you sit at, honeyed whiskey glares back at you from your glass winking in the lantern light. You reach for your glass, scowling when your hand doesn't connect with it.

"Shit." You growl, trying again and nearly toppling the whole thing. The amber liquid sweats down the side of the glass and onto the wooden table. You scowl at it. "Asshole."

"Y/n, why are you wasting a perfectly good drink?" Hange narrows her eyes at you though her lips are quivering into a grin. It's contagious. You smile, laughter bubbling over your lips.

"Stupid whiskey keeps running away." You utter and she raises an eyebrow before leaning in and whispering far too loud.

"I saw it. Damn thing doesn't want to be drunk." She laughs taking a gulp of her own drink.

You frown, glaring at your drink. You lunge for it, grateful when your fingers curl around the glass and for the fire that licks at your throat as you drink. Warm and sensational.

"Fuck. They're toasted." Mike says, leaning his head on his hand. 

Moblit sighs beside him, gripping his flagon of beer in a white knuckled fist. "He's going to kill us."

Mike laughs, its too loud for your ears and you glare at him, raising a shaky hand to point at him.

"Hey, Mike! Shut the hell up." You growl. Hange snorts into her drink beside you.

"Make me, y/n." His lips twitch into a smirk. His eyes laughing at you. You hate it.

You place your hand on the table, rising from your seat. The room lurches around you but you manage, putting one foot down after the other. Mike's smirk fills your vision and you round the table grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. It does nothing but bunch the fabric at his neck. 

"Listen here, you dick." You growl. "I'm not putting up with your shit tonight."

His eyes flick to your closed fist around his shirt before returning to your face. "A shame, y/n. Here I thought we were all having fun."

"I was until you opened your big ass mouth, you shit-eating giant."

"Shit-eating giant?" He laughs putting a large hand on your shoulder. "And here I thought you were better than Levi. Name calling and shit jokes, really y/n?" His smile is teasing and you pout.

"Leave Levi out of it." You glower at him. 

"Leave me out of what?" Levi steps into the room, his expression sour. You turn to look at him, Mike's collar still held in your clenched fist. 

You wrinkle your nose at Levi. "It doesn't concern you."

Levi raises an eyebrow at you and looks to Moblit and Mike. Moblit is as white as a sheet under Levi's glare. "Mike?"

Mike snorts putting his hands in the air. "I didn't do anything, y/n decided to assault me for no damn reason."

You glare down at him. "You fucker." You rear your arm back ready to hit him.

"Y/n!" Moblit starts to stand but Levi is on you in an instant. He pulls you back by your elbows, Mike slipping from your grasp.

"Levi!" You growl fighting against him. He takes a deep breath before looking between them.

"Who's ass do I have to kick for her being this drunk?" He asks, grinding his teeth as you hit him in the chest. 

Moblit blanches beneath his glare but says nothing. Mike pipes up. "Hange. Who else?"

Levi's eyebrow twitches as he watches Hange try to pour herself another glass and spill the drink all over the table. "And you let them?"

Mike shrugs. "Y/n has a will of her own, and you know how Hange's a pain in the ass."

Moblit frowns at his words, looking into his own cup.

Levi sighs before looking to Moblit. "When Shitty Glasses sobers up, tell her I'm burning all her damn titan loving research." 

"Levi." Moblit tries to protest, but is immediately silenced by Levi's glare. Levi's eyes dart to Mike as he tries to keep you from falling backwards, as the room spins around you again. "If he doesn't tell her, make sure you do." Mike nods and Levi finally focuses on you. His dark eyes settle on your face and he sighs deeply. "Dear god, y/n." He grabs you by the waist and puts your arm around his shoulder and leaning on him you both leave the mess hall. The world tips and turns around you and your hand goes to your knotted stomach. 

"Levi, I don't feel good."

He exhales deeply through his nose before looking at you. "I wonder why, brat." He sighs before lifting you into his arms. Your stomach lurches at the movement. "Close your eyes and tuck your head into my chest. It'll be better for you."

"Levi." You groan. 

"Just do it." 

You do and immediately feel better. It's a short walk to your quarters and you're grateful when he lays you down on the couch. He's frowning down at you and you pout. "Come here." You say grabbing him by the arm. Aggravation floods his features, but he obliges. He leans closer and you cup his cheeks with both hands. Your thumbs go to the corners of his mouth, trying to force him to smile. "You need to smile more, you grumpy ass." His eyebrows knit together fiercely as he stares down at you but he doesn't say anything. You let go of the corners of his mouth and you push at his furrowed brows trying to make him look less angry. He takes a deep breath before prying your hands from his face. He stalks across the room to light the fire. 

"Idiot." You hear him grumble. 

"Levi, why didn't you drink with us?" You pick at the buttons of your blouse. You sort of remembered him talking about Erwin. 

He looks back at you, shaking his head. He walks back to you, re-buttoning your shirt with a roll of his eyes. "Y/n, I already told you."

"Tell me again."

"You're such a pain in the ass." He sits down next to you scooping your legs into his lap. His dark eyes are aggravated and concerned as he looks at you. His fingers glide along your knee and you shiver. He sighs. "I'm making you my second in command." 

You squirm beneath his dark eyes and he smiles faintly. Excitement bubbles inside you but more so than that is the pride you feel at hearing the words fall from his lips. Second in command. You were going to be his second in command. It made you just about as giddy as him calling you his wife for the first time. You sit up, nearly crawling in his lap. He searches your face as you cup his face once more in your hands.

"Please tell me, you're not going to try and make me smile again." His eyebrows are furrowed but his eyes tell you that he's happy and just a tad annoyed. You smile at him, pecking him on the lips.

"Nope. Not doing that again." You chime and he smiles in relief.

"Good."

"I'm so excited." You run your thumb along his jaw, staring into his eyes. They're like a starless night and you want to get lost in them forever.

He rolls his eyes. "Don't get too excited. It's mostly honorary. It just means you're in charge of the squad when I'm not there."

You smirk, leaning back. "I can't wait to tell Mikasa."

His eyebrows knit together again as he sighs. "You're trouble, I swear."

Your smirk grows into a shit-eating grin. Mikasa had been striving for the spot and Levi had considered it for a time, though you're ability to mother the squad and having all of their respect made you the more likeable candidate. Besides, you had far more experience beyond the wall. You readjust yourself in his lap and squeak when you tumble out of it and onto the floor, nearly bumping your head on the table.

"Y/n!"

Laughter tumbles from your lips as you look up at him, your limbs sprawled awkwardly beneath you. 

"Dear god, brat." He grabs you by the elbow and helps you back onto the couch. The tea kettle is whistling and he makes sure you're secure on the couch twice before he goes to remove it from the fire. He pours you both a cup, and forces the teacup into your hands. You're grateful for the warmth and bring it to your lips, the steam kissing your face.

Levi grabs your wrist, a look of horror on his face. He grabs the cup and sets it down on the table. "Maybe wait till its cooled down enough to drink?" You nod and he shakes his head. He runs a hand through your hair, before pulling you into his arms. The tea forgotten completely. "You idiot." He breathes kissing you on the top of your head. "Why'd you have to go and get drunk?"

"Sorry." You mumble fidgeting with the cuff of his sleeve.You look up at him, at the gentleness that lingers in his eyes. 

"You're a beautiful mess, y/n." He hugs you tighter and you lean into him soaking up his warmth.

"You too."

He chuckles. "Thanks, brat." He kisses you on the cheek, a smile tugging at his lips. "I can't believe you were going to punch Mike." His voice is filled with a hint of awe. "God, I love you."

You pout, scrunching your eyebrows together. "He was being an ass. Besides he wouldn't hurt me even if I did try to kick his ass."

Levi raises an eyebrow. "He wouldn't live to see another day if he did." He grumbles.

You giggle. "Levi, you can't kill Mike. That would make Erwin mad."

Levi shakes his head, his hair falling in his eyes. He grabs your chin with his thumb and index, raising your head so you look at him. "Don't worry, I wouldn't kill him." There's a hint of a smirk on his lips and you frown. "Hey, don't give me that face." He kisses you. Once. Twice. You cling to his collar, your thumbs stroking the warm skin of his chest. He sighs, resting his forehead against yours. Your eyes flit to the buttons of his shirt and his calloused hand wraps around yours. He shakes his head before removing your hands. He kisses you on the cheek. "Not tonight." He motions toward the table with his chin. "Drink your tea. You need to sober up." 

Frowning, you crawl out of his lap and grab your tea. Luckily, you don't spill it as you bring it to your lips once more. It's bitter and warm and it does wonders for your swimming head. You tilt your head, looking at Levi. "Thank you, Captain."

His smile is strained. "Captain? You haven't called me that in a long time."

You stick your tongue out at him before taking another sip of tea. "You know I've always liked your title."

He laughs. "How much did you drink tonight, y/n?"

You blush, your lips pursed. "I only had twelve shots."

"Twelve?" His voice hitches, eyes narrowing. "Fuck. They're dead. Those assholes."

"Levi." You chastise him and he sighs looking back at you. 

"Joking." You fix him with a glare. "Mostly." He sips his tea and you watch him a moment. The way his fingers straddle the rim of his teacup, the way his eyelashes brush his cheeks as he drinks, the subtle and sexy way he crosses his legs. You smile, taking another sip of your tea. This man. Captain Levi Ackerman. He was yours. His eyes flick to you and you wrinkle your nose at him. "What?" He asks.

"Nothing. I just love you, Captain."

He rolls his eyes but he's smiling. He sets his cup down and you take a last sip before setting yours down too. "Come here." He pulls you to him. You settle in his lap, his arms wrapped around you. He rubs circles into your bare arms. He let's out a deep breath, stirring a few strands of your hair. "And I'm so helplessly in love with you, y/n." He kisses your temple and you feel the tears budding in the corner of your eyes. His words are too much for your little heart and your swimming head. 

"Levi." Your lip is trembling as you stare up at him. He's smiling down at you, as he brushes your hair out of your face.

"Come here, brat." He guides you down onto the couch beside him. Your back is flush to his chest and he sighs draping his arm over you, holding you close. "Try to get some rest. If this is anything like the last time you were drunk, you're going to be in for one hell of a day tomorrow." He kisses your shoulder and you snuggle into him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you all think? I'm in love with this chapter <3


	52. A Welcome Respite, Part 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the super late update guys! I just started college classes for the Fall semester and boy are they kicking my butt. But anywho, here is the next little snippet of this amazing story and I hope you do enjoy it. I know my little heart is happy <3

It's dusk. The wind tousles your hair as you stand on top of Wall Rose, the vast sky turning a beautiful lavender as you look out over the countryside between Wall Rose and Maria. It's peaceful. No titans in sight, only endless green fields and the sporadic clusters of trees their leaves changing to golds and reds with the change of the season. The wind nips at your cheeks leaving them ruddy and pink. You take in a breath of the crisp air, feeling its coldness dwell in your lungs. Feel it rejuvenate your tiredness. 

"Y/n." 

You turn to Levi. His dark bangs are windswept. His eyes silver in the waning light. "Sorry, coming." You jog to catch up and he shakes his head grasping your hand in his when you reach him. You're grateful for his warmth. You walk hand in hand across the wall to the edge. 

"Ready?" He asks and you nod. He nibbles at his lip and you can tell he's nervous. After all, he hadn't really liked the idea all too much. You give him a reassuring smile. He grabs you by the elbow as you sit at the edge. Your legs dangling over. "Anchor yourself." His tone is harsh but you know he just wants to make sure you're safe. 

"Alright, alright." He tugs at your lines and once content he follows suit. His boots clack noisily against the side of the wall as he sits and you smile. Despite his bravery, it seemed this was a little out of his comfort zone. 

He casts you a weary look. "How is it that you always end up convincing me to do stupid things?"

You grin at him. "Because you love me."

He rolls his eyes. "Didn't I tell you you'd be the death of me." He sighs leaning back on his palms. 

You giggle as he relaxes. His eyes half-lidded as he looks out on the horizon. "It's pretty isn't it?"

He nods. "Yeah."

You swing your feet thoughtfully. "Levi, what do you think is beyond the walls?"

He shrugs. "Aside from titans, I don't know." He tilts his head, his adam's apple bobbing. "I heard Armin talking about how there might be an ocean out there, but I'm not sure I believe it."

You sigh in wonder. "Wouldn't that be something though?"

He turns to look at you, his eyes searching your face. "What do you think is out there, y/n?"

You chuckle. "I don't know. Hope? For a better future."

"And what kind of future is that?" You catch a glimpse of his expression. He's serious, a smile twitching at the corners of his lips.

You tuck your hair behind your ear. "One with you of course." 

He snorts. "How did I know that was what you would say?"

You punch him in the shoulder lightly and he laughs. "Don't make fun of me."

"Sorry, I'm not. Tell me more. Just what is it you see, y/n. What do you picture us like out there beyond the walls? In a world of hope."

A blush creeps onto your cheeks and you hope he blames the cold. "Hm, let me think." Your eyes scan the horizon, to a patch of trees and you smile. "I can see us living in a little house in the woods. There'd be a creek nearby so we could keep up with your excessive cleaning." You bite back a laugh as he rolls his eyes. "It'd have a little fireplace and a garden. We'd work together to keep it maintained, to put food on the table." 

"So your idea of happiness is one of menial labor?" He chuckles his eyes playful. You roll your eyes at him and he intertwines his hand with yours. "Anything else I should be warned about?" 

You frown. "You're so funny."

He smirks. Despite his teasing, you love it. "Sorry. Keep talking. I want to hear more." He kisses the back of your hand and all is forgiven. 

"I don't know. I guess I see us having kids." You blush remembering the previous conversation you'd had on the subject. Levi's silent and you turn to look at him. He's staring at you, eyes wide. Mouth drawn into a flat line. You close your mouth afraid you'd said something wrong. Afraid you'd hurt him somehow. 

But he sighs, letting go of your hand to run his fingers through your hair. The pads of his fingers graze across your cheek warm and delightful. He smiles. "I can see it."

You worry your cheek lost in those dark eyes. "Boy or girl?" He raises an eyebrow and you laugh. "Sorry, which do you prefer?"

His eyebrows scrunch together. "Is that really a question people ask? I don't care." It's his turn, his ears tinged red in the near dark.

You smile. "I see a little boy. Your dark hair, too brave for his own good." You snicker and Levi cups your cheek drawing your eyes to him.

He's smiling. "Your big heart and kindness. I can see it."

The timbre of his voice makes you shiver. It makes your heart ache. What had started as a fun game now left you feeling strangely melancholy. Was this only a dream you could have in some fictitious world, in your imaginings? 

His eyes search your face. His smile vanishing on the wind. His expression is somber. His fingers trembling against your jaw. "Y/n." You don't speak. You can't find the words for him. "I want that for us. And maybe I'm selfish for that. Maybe it isn't the right time, or completely fair." He sucks in a breath. "But don't we deserve some piece of that dream?"

"Levi." His touch is gentle. You could melt under his tender gaze. He brushes his finger over your lips and gives you a small smile. 

"I think this world needs more kind people. More people like you."

"And like you. You tend to forget you're kind too."

He chuckles. "Fine, like us." He runs his fingers through your hair once more. "What do you say, y/n? Do you think that could be in our future? Our real future?"

You feel like crying. Your stomach flutters with excitement and nervousness. Were you ready for that kind of responsibility? Could you handle it? Being a mother? Levi kisses you against your temple and you let out a shaky breath. With him beside you, you could do anything. You capture his lips in yours, looking up at him through your lashes as you part. "Yes." You breathe. "Yes, I want that future." He kisses you again, cupping your cheek in his warm hand. Your foreheads resting against each other, you both listen to each other's soft breathing as the night turns black. As the torches are lit on the other side of the wall. As the stars gape down at you. None of it matters. Only the warmth of his breath on your cheek. The subtle curve of his lips as he smiles. His fingers laced in yours. All that matters is the two of you.  
Husband and wife and the hope flickering in your hearts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Sighs contentedly* So what did you all think? I think I'm in love <3


	53. A New Day, Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are, my readers. Hope you enjoy! I'm excited for this chapter and the one's to come <3

You lay in bed, your eyes closed to the blinding light peeking through the bedroom window. You groan rolling over to face Levi and hoping to go back to sleep but he's determined to wake you. His lips are warm against your cheek, your neck, your bare shoulder. You flinch your hands pushing against his bare chest. 

"Levi." You groan and he chuckles nuzzling against your neck, his hair tickling you. You finally open your eyes to find him staring at you. Your cheeks tinge pink at the tenderness you find there. 

He kisses you on the forehead. "Come on, you need to get up."

You groan as he gets out of bed, you reach for his hand wanting to drag him back but he's just out of reach and you pout. Your eyes roam over his bareback and the silver scars that dapple his skin. He reaches for a shirt and you sigh when you can no longer admire him. You rest your head in your hands, propping yourself up. He looks at you over his shoulder, his hair falling in his eyes and he shakes his head. 

"Come back to bed." You grumble and he rolls his eyes sitting on the edge. 

He cups your cheek in a warm hand before kissing you. "Y/n, come on it's our first day back on duty."

You grab his collar pulling him down with you onto the bed. A smile tugging at your lips as you kiss him. Again and again. He fingers the strap of your nightgown and you sigh before kissing him along his jaw and neck. He lets out a shaky breath, eyes half-lidded and you shiver at the noise. He sighs placing a kiss on your cheek before untangling himself from you. He's biting his lip clearly wrestling with his self-control. You stare up at him and he narrows his eyes at you. "Y/n." Your fingers go to the buttons of his shirt and he covers your hands with his. His eyes are dark, his jaw working as he stares at you. 

"Levi." You smile at him.

He groans letting go of you and launching himself out of bed. 

"Later." He says and you watch him. The blush creeping across his cheeks and down his neck. The stiff way in which he finishes dressing. You loved that you had this effect on him. 

"Promise?" You ask sliding to sit on the edge of the bed. 

He finishes buttoning his shirt. Harness in hand as he walks toward you. He kisses your ear. "Promise." He whispers. You shiver. He grabs your arm lifting you to your feet. "Now get dressed." You stretch your arms over your head when he releases you. Your whole body is sore and you grin at the memories of the night prior as you walk to the closet. You quickly change into your uniform and are grateful for the warm cup of tea Levi hands you once you join him in the office. You take a few sips noticing that he's fallen into his routine already. Eyes roaming over his paperwork, legs crossed as he absently sips his tea. 

You sigh taking a dreg of your own cup. "Meet you at the training grounds?" You already knew he was going to skip breakfast. 

His eyes rise to meet yours. "Actually we're meeting with Erwin, Hange, and Mike after breakfast."

You raise an eyebrow. "The whole squad?"

He nods. "Guess they waited for us to come back to start another expedition." He frowns.

"Joy." You grumble tugging on your boots. "Well, I suppose I'll grab breakfast and try and at least enjoy the squad's company for a bit." You stand up striding to his desk and placing a kiss at his temple. "I'll see you a little later." He smiles up at you before tugging you closer and placing a kiss on your lips. Your heart flutters contently against your chest as you turn to leave knowing full well he's already delving back into his paperwork.

You reach the mess hall. It's noisier than you remember as you take your seat next to Sasha and Jean. They both throw an arm over you. "Y/n!" Sasha beams giving your shoulder a squeeze.

"Glad to have you back." Jean grins at you and you can't help but smile at the two.

"We're all glad to have you back," Eren utters and your eyes dart to him and the slight annoyance playing across his features. He's glaring at Jean and you chuckle glad to see that not much had changed in your two-week absence. 

"I never said I was excluding any of you." Jean grumbles and your surprised that he isn't immediately biting off Eren's head. 

Sasha leans in close. "Jean and Eren had a bit of a bro moment while you were gone. Seems Moblit is rather good at pacifying idiots."

"I heard that Potato Girl," Jean growls.

Sasha pouts. "I eat a potato once in training and suddenly that's the only name you can think of to call me? Sheesh." Sasha's laughter is contagious and you find yourself clutching your stomach trying not to choke on your toast.

"Okay, okay. This was definitely worth waking up for." You chuckle.

Sasha redirects her attention to you. "Oh yeah, how was your vacation?" She winks at you. "Do anything fun and exciting?" She sighs. "Unfortunately, we just ran drills and tried to escape Hange's crazy episodes."

You laugh imagining the horror the group had probably had to endure. "It was relaxing. We definitely needed the break. " You blush slightly and avert your eyes when you see Sasha's smirk. Nope. There was no way you were discussing the details of your much-needed break or the fact that you and Levi had finally decided you were going to try and be parents. You sigh, they'd find out eventually, right? No need to share. 

You look at Armin, hoping to engage him in some sort of conversation to keep Sasha from continuing her train of thought. "Armin, did you guys learn any new tactics from Hange's squad?" His face lights up and you let out a sigh of relief as he starts babbling about all the maneuvers he'd learned under Hange's supervision.

Your mouth twitches as you stare at Erwin. His voice grating your nerves as he goes over your objective for the third time. Your squad was present as were Hange's and Mike's. Levi had joined you all shortly after your squad had arrived and you looked sideways at him now wondering just what he thought of this ridiculous expedition. No one speaks so you decide to pipe up.

"Excuse me, but didn't we already capture a titan ages ago? Why are we capturing another?" You ask, your eyebrow raised as you give Hange a pointed look.

"Well, you see." She starts rubbing the back of her neck. "I kind of got carried away."

"Tch. Fucking idiot." Levi grumbles glaring at her. You roll your eyes as well. Of course, you had to go on this ridiculous expedition because she'd fucked up.

"Fine, how many meters?"

Erwin appraises you with amused blue eyes. "Six."

Mike steps closer to you and Levi and you can see Levi tense. Mike sniffs in your direction and you raise an eyebrow but let it go. 

You look to Levi. "Should our Squad bait it?" 

He nods. "We're the least likely to get killed." You flinch slightly at his back-handed words. 

Mike frowns. "I have an objection."

Erwin looks to Mike. "What is it?"

"Y/n shouldn't come." Mike is staring at you now. Eyes filled with intrigue.

"Excuse me?" You glare at him as does Levi.

"She's coming," Levi growls.

Mike sighs, rolling his eyes at the shorter Captain. "Don't be an idiot, Levi, or do you want your pregnant wife to be in danger for something as stupid as a mistake that Hange made?"

All eyes dart to you. You look at Mike, mouth agape. "What?"

He sighs. "Well, at least I know now that you both aren't idiots, and you weren't aware."

Your eyes flick to Levi's. His expression is one of wonder but you can see the worry start to cloud his eyes. "You're not going." He finally says.

"Levi, we don't even know if what Mike's saying is true." You try to rationalize with him but he shakes his head. 

"Sasha, you're staying with her." He looks at her briefly and she salutes before his eyes fall on you again. "I want you to go see a doctor."

"Levi." You take a step forward and he takes your hand in his. 

"Please just do this for me, okay?" His voice is soft as he worries his lip. "I'll be fine. It's a simple mission and we have three squads." 

Jean and Eren step forward. Jean puts his hand on your shoulder with a soft smile. "We'll protect him out there for you." He says and Eren nods vigorously next to him, green eyes determined. 

"Thank you." You utter, your heart squeezing in your chest. You wanted to be with him but if what Mike said was true, you had someone else to worry about too. 

Erwin clears his throat. "Y/n, we'll see you when we get back." He turns to the rest of the assembled squads. "As for us, we need to move out." They all slowly follow him out of the hall. Sasha quickly says her goodbyes to Connie.

Levi stops and pecks you on the cheek. "I love you." He rests his forehead against yours briefly.

"I love you too." 

He sighs and you watch him, the wings of freedom fluttering across his shoulders as he disappears down the hall.

You take a shaky breath trying to compose yourself. Sasha squeezes your shoulder. "Come on, let's get you to a doctor." She smiles at you and you nod. This was not at all how you had expected your first day back on duty to go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, so! What did you think? I'm super excited for this relationship to get more complicated and endearing <3


	54. A New Day, Part 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, my readers!! I am so sorry for such a late update! I hope you enjoy this chapter and I will try to update again soon. Upper level English courses are kicking my butt right now.

You had visited the doctor like Levi had asked and boy was your head spinning. Not only were you pregnant but a lot further along than you had expected. 

"Seven months? I only have seven months." You stare into your cup of tea as Sasha tries to comfort you. 

"Hey, look at it this way. You'll get to see the little guy or girl sooner. Isn't that a blessing?" She smiles down at you.

You stare up at her with wide eyes. "Sasha, we literally decided to try and be parents two days ago. I'm not ready for this. I mean I wasn't expecting this...so soon."

Sasha gives your arm a gentle squeeze as she gives you a sheepish grin. You realize you're making her slightly uncomfortable. "Sorry, Sasha. I didn't mean to drag you into this. It wasn't fair for Levi to force you to stay with me."

She shakes her head. "Don't worry about it y/n." She gives you a half-hug. "Honestly, I'm happy for you two. Though Eren and Jean may be a little peeved that they lost the bet."

You raise an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

She laughs. "Sorry. We may have all sort of bet as to whether or not you guys would have kids. We were bored and drunk one night." She shrugs.

You roll your eyes. "You guys are idiots."

"Yeah, sometimes." She chuckles. "Though Connie and I were sure you would and here we are." She winks.

You sigh finishing your cup of tea. " Sasha, if I'm being honest, I'm a little scared. I know nothing about being a parent and we still haven't really figured out how this is going to work. I'm probably going to be replaced on the squad. I'll be out of commission for seven months." You swallow the lump forming in your throat.

"Y/n...are you kidding?" You look up at Sasha to see her staring at you like you have a second head. "Do you really think Captain Levi will replace you? Y/n he made you his second in command. By the walls, you're his wife. Stop acting like he's going to cast you aside. He wouldn't do that. He loves you too much to do something that stupid."

You take a deep breath reassured by her words. "You're right, Sasha. I'm being silly." You look toward the door. "I just wish they would get back already." You chew on your lip and Sasha smiles though you can see her own anxiety as she casts a glance at the door. You felt a little guilty for your selfishness. She was waiting for Connie to come home too. "Thank you for being here." You squeeze her hand, giving her a small smile. "It means a lot to have a friend with me." She nods, and the door rattles on its frame as it swung open.

"Y/n!" Levi crosses the room his eyes searching your face.

"I'll go find Connie." She says and you mouth a 'thank you' as she leaves. 

You look up at Levi as he takes a seat next to you. He's anxious, you can tell from the way his eyebrows are stitched together but also by the fact that he was sitting here in a dirty uniform on your couch. You bite your lip giving him a small smile. "We're going to be parents." He lets out a breath he's been holding and captures you in a hug resting his forehead against yours. 

"And? Is everything okay? Are you okay?"

"Levi..." His arms tighten around you. You stroke his arm and he loosens his grip slightly. "I'm fine. Though I'm two months along, which means we only have seven months to figure everything out."

You look up at him. His expression is nearly unreadable, his teeth grinding together. "We'll figure it out. Even if it means you don't go on expeditions. You can still do some basic training with the squad."

You pull away from him and frown. "Levi," You were ready to argue for you to stay on with the squad as long as possible. You blink, his words finally registering. "Wait, did you just say I could still do basic training?"

"As long as you don't overdo it and you follow whatever the doctor wants you to do." His usually composed voice is a tad frantic and you smile at him. 

"Of course." You kiss him on the cheek and he pulls you closer, not at all satisfied when he kisses you on the lips. 

"We're going to be parents. Holy shit." He smiles and you can't help but giggle. 

"Looks like that future we hoped for is happening." All the fear you'd felt earlier melted away at the look he gave you. His eyes meet yours and your heart skips a beat. The happiness you saw there, the tenderness. 

He strokes your cheek and you lean into the familiar warmth as he gives you a crooked grin. "I'm looking forward to every moment of it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you all think?


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